Buyers and sellers

Running my new eBay store, Cinderbox, has been a learning experience. I’m trying to figure out ways to stand out in the sea of sellers—building a website, maybe even doing merch down the line. But this story isn’t really about my store. It’s about something bigger: negative reviews.

I just got my first one, and it wasn’t the red minus or the percentage drop that bothered me—it was the way the buyer handled it.

I picked up a box of stuff at a garage sale, and inside were two Playboy magazines from the ’60s. I thought, why not see what they’re worth? One was a regular issue, not worth much, so I listed it for $10. The other had an Ian Fleming story, so I put that one up for $35. A few people looked, but eventually the $10 issue sold. I shipped it right away, happy for the sale—every sale matters when you’re starting out.

Then I saw the feedback:

“Pages torn out Center fold gone You are not honest. Avoid this seller”

That hit me. I didn’t rip out the pages—I just didn’t check carefully enough before listing. Dumb mistake, sure, but dishonest? No.

I messaged the buyer immediately, apologized, explained the oversight, and offered either a partial refund or a full return. I even posted under his feedback that I was sorry again and repeated the offer. His reply?

“Okay, not necessary”

So he kept the review as is. I hoped he’d change it, but he didn’t. And when I checked the other magazine, I found missing pages there too—so I pulled the listing. Lesson learned: from now on, I’ll check books and magazines before posting.

But here’s the bigger point. I see this all the time on Amazon, Best Buy, everywhere. Buyers go from happy to hostile in seconds, without considering that mistakes happen—or that damage can occur in transit. Reviews are powerful, and sometimes they’re written like weapons.

The seller isn’t always the villain. Yet they’re the easiest target.

I’ve seen the opposite too. I once sold a shoe rack and realized, while taking it apart to ship, that a wingnut was missing. I couldn’t find a replacement anywhere, so I wrote the buyer to explain. Her response was simple: “Send it, I’ll fix it.” She got the rack, handled the repair herself, and left me a good review. That’s what happens when buyers choose cooperation over hostility—the marketplace feels human again.

When I buy from Amazon and something’s wrong—missing part, broken item—I contact the seller first if I can. Most of the time, they fix it. If they don’t respond or refuse to help, then I leave negative feedback. That’s fair. But too often, people skip that step and go straight to blasting the seller.

There are plenty of reasons a product might arrive flawed:

1. Oversight by the seller (like me not checking the magazine).

2. A defect at the company level.

3. Damage in transit.

4. Human error at the warehouse or store.

I believe negative feedback has its place. If a seller ignores you, refuses to fix a problem, or misrepresents an item, then yes—buyers should warn others. But blasting someone for an honest mistake, especially when they offer a resolution, doesn’t help anyone.

I’m not going to beg this buyer to change his review. I’ll take it on the chin and move forward. But I hope readers think twice before firing off negative feedback. Sometimes it’s just a mistake. Sometimes it’s not even the seller’s fault. And sometimes, giving them a chance to fix it shows you more about their honesty than the product itself.