What I Deserve

Lily and I arrived at the goofy golf course at about the same time. Andy and Jane were already busily at play. Andy looked up in surprise when I arrived, and Jane glanced up a moment later.

"Hi, bro," I said. "You know Lily. Jane, this is Lily. Lily, this is Andy's girlfriend, Jane."

"Hi!" Lily smiled and extended her hand.

"Hi," Jane said shyly, shaking Lily's hand.

"I've been wanting to get you two together for ages," I told them. "You have something important in common."

They both just stared at me, surprised. "What on earth are you talking about, Lace?" asked Lily.

"Show Lily that picture of your Dad you showed me, Jane."

Puzzled, Jane took the photograph from her purse and showed it to Lily, who gasped. "That can't be your Dad!" she exclaimed. "He's my Dad!"

"Was your Dad in Las Vegas about nineteen years ago?" asked Jane.

"Why...yes, he was!" Understanding slowly dawned on Lily's face. "Do you mean to tell me that..."

Jane laughed. "We're sisters!" Tears were in their eyes as they embraced one another. "So where's Dad now?" asked Jane.

"He lives not too far from here," Lily replied. "I wonder why he never told me about you. Have you ever met him?"

"Never. My Mom never talks about him. She just gave me that one picture. I was raised by my stepfather, but he and my Mom got divorced a few months ago."

"I'll have to introduce you two as soon as I can," said Lily. "You know, it's funny he never mentioned you to me. I wonder if he even knows you exist."

Jane shrugged. "I have no idea. Is he still married to your Mom?"

"Oh, no. They got divorced a long time ago."

"Did either one of them ever get married again?"

"They both did. And then got divorced again." Lily sighed. "You know, I think they still have feelings for each other."

"Do you have any other brothers or sisters?"

"Nope. You?"

"I have a half-brother, Atlas. He's twelve."

By now everyone had lost interest in playing goofy golf. Jane left with Lily in her car to see if their Dad was home, and Andy and I both went back home, too.

When I got home, I saw that Maxim was pushing Morgan in one swing while Seth swung in the other, and Simba pranced around, barking happily. "Hey, boy!" I exclaimed as I bent down to scratch between his ears.

"So how did the meeting between Lily and Jane go?" asked Maxim. I'd told him of my plans before I'd left.

"It went great! Lily's taken Jane to meet their father. Thanks for watching the kids for me. I really appreciate it."

"Hey, no problem at all!" He came over and gave me a quick hug and kiss. "I think it's great that you got the two of them together."

"Yeah." I took over pushing Morgan and he went into the house.

Later I cooked roast beef and potatoes for our dinner. After dinner, Maxim and I did the dishes together while talking and laughing and then sat in the living room watching television and playing with the kids. While we were doing that, Lily called me.

"I just wanted to say thanks for bringing me and Jane together," she said. "She's great. We had a blast at my Dad's. It turns out he'd been sending her Mom money to help support her all along. I asked him why he never told me about her. He said that he was afraid I'd be mad at him because of my Mom, even though they were already divorced when he got together with her Mom."

"Then I asked why he'd never tried to visit her or get in touch with her. He said that he'd known she was in a stable family unit and hadn't wanted to disrupt that."

"Well, I'm glad you guys all had a nice time together," I said. My mind was on Chad and what he'd said to me when he'd come to visit his aunt in the hospital. Lily hadn't mentioned Ashton to me at all. Perhaps she wasn't even still seeing him. At any rate, I knew that it wasn't really the appropriate time to bring the subject up, so I didn't.

After I'd gotten the kids to bed, Maxim and I were snuggling together on the sofa watching a movie when I found my hand slowly moving southward until it reached the elastic of his underpants, then gently slipping beneath them to fondle him. When I'd gotten him hard, I slipped to my knees and tugged his shorts and underpants down.

He gave a gasp of pleasure as I slipped him into my mouth and began to suckle him while lightly massaging his balls. When he was close, he began to grunt and thrust, and we moved to the bedroom, where we tumbled onto the bed and he quickly removed my shorts and panties, put on a condom, and entered me.

"You've been very naughty, you know," he told me as we lay together in bed afterwards.

"I know."

"What do you think you deserve?"

"A spanking?"

"Uh huh." He grinned. "But this time, I have a special surprise for you."

"Oh, I love surprises!" I said.

"Close your eyes." Obediently, I closed them. There was silence for a few seconds, and then Maxim spoke again. "Now open them."

I opened my eyes to see him holding a pink paddle with a white ribbon wrapped around it.

"Do you like it?" he asked.

"I love it!" I told him. "You know just how to make a little girl happy!"

"Am I a good Daddy, then?"

"You're the best Daddy in the whole wide world!"

He handed it to me. "Unwrap it." Eagerly I untied the ribbon and let it fall, then handed the paddle back to my husband. "Now bend over."

He spanked me hard with the new paddle. It was a lot firmer than just his hand, but I loved it all the same. Afterwards, we lay perfectly still in bed, holding one another tightly, until I heard his gentle snoring.

Later that month, we went to WalMart to buy Seth's school supplies. While there, we met up with Yuri, Erin, and their children. "I'm gonna be in the big school this year," Seth proudly told Toni and Sonya.

"This is my last year there," Toni replied. "I'm going into the fifth grade. I'm gonna be in middle school next year. I can't wait! I want to be a cheerleader."

"That's fine with me, as long as you can keep your grades up," said Erin. "You know that has to come first."

"Oh, she'll be fine," Yuri assured his wife. "That's a whole year from now, anyway."

Busily I searched for all the items on Seth's school supply list. After what seemed like ages, I finally had everything together, and we all headed for the check-out lanes.

"Mama! Potty!" Morgan cried as we were standing in line. Hurriedly I grabbed her from the shopping cart and took her to the restroom.

Fortunately, we made it there on time. "Good girl!" I praised her. When we were finished, I returned to the check-out lane we'd been in to see that Maxim and Seth were nowhere to be found.

"We're over here, Mommy!" I turned in the direction of my son's voice to see him standing near the exit with the rest of the family. Maxim held the bags containing our purchases. I heaved a huge sigh of relief and rushed to join the others.

When we got back home, I labeled all Seth's new school supplies and put them in his backpack, ready for the first day of school. Then I bathed both kids, read them a story, and put them to bed.

I was watching television with Maxim when Seth called out to me about thirty minutes later. I entered his bedroom to find him lying in bed wide awake with a worried look on his face. "What is it, sweetie?" I asked him.

"What if the kids at the big school don't like me?" he asked.

"Of course they'll like you!" I replied. "Why wouldn't they?"

"I don't know."

I laughed and tucked him back in. "Silly boy, go to sleep!"

I was almost out of the room when I heard his voice again. "Mommy?"

With a sigh I turned back to him. "What if the teacher's mean? What if the work's too hard?"

"Everything's gonna be fine, Sage." I went back to him and kissed his forehead. "Now go to sleep."

Maxim gave me a questioning look as I returned to the living room. "Pre first day of school jitters," I explained.

That night, he asked me whether I wanted to be spanked with his hand or the paddle.

"You mean I get to choose?"

"Of course! I love my little girl and want her to be happy."

"Oh, you are a good Daddy! Start out using your hand, and then switch to the paddle."

"I'll do that." He did. I could tell when he switched because the blows felt different.

The following Monday morning, Maxim and I stood with Seth at the corner of our street, waiting for the bus. I saw that a slight blonde woman accompanied by a blond-haired boy of about six were there, too. The woman introduced herself as Kirsten and her son as Matthew.

"Oh yeah, I remember seeing him get off the bus in the afternoon last year," I told her.

"I recognize you," she told Maxim. "You gave me a speeding ticket a couple of weeks ago. I had no idea you lived right down the street from me."

"Sorry." Maxim looked terribly embarrassed. "Rules are rules."

At last the bus arrived, and I watched Seth mount the big steps, suddenly realizing how small he looked by comparison to them. Suddenly I felt Maxim's arm around me, giving me a reassuring hug. "He'll be fine, Lace!"

I arrived at work later to find the emergency room in total mayhem. "Somebody crashed into a school bus," another nurse told me.

My heart nearly stopped. Seth! "What school was it?" I asked.

"I don't know," the other nurse replied. Frustrated, I asked several other co-workers the same question, until at last someone told me the name of the school. I sagged with relief to learn that it wasn't Seth's school.

I joined the others in starting I.V. lines and applying bandages. A dozen or so of the children were seriously injured, and despite the best efforts of the emergency room personnel, we lost four of them. As I gazed at the little bodies lying there so very still, overwhelming sorrow overcame me. I thanked my lucky stars that I wasn't the one with the heartrending task of notifying the parents.

Although I soon became busy with other tasks, the vision of the dead children haunted me for the rest of the day, and I knew it was something I'd remember for the rest of my life.

That night, Maxim and I lay cuddling in bed when he asked me about it. "Something's been weighing heavy on your mind all evening," he remarked. "What is it?"

"Oh, Maxim, it was horrible!" Unable to hold it in any longer, I burst into tears. "Somebody smashed into a school bus this morning, and they brought all these little kids into the emergency room. They were all hurt and scared and crying, and four of them...four of them...didn't make it."

I began to sob heavily, and he held and comforted me. "When I first found out about it, I was so s-scared..." I stammered when I could speak again.

"I know, sweetheart. I know," Maxim murmured.

"It could just as easily have been Seth's bus," I continued.

"I know, darling." Tenderly he kissed my forehead. "It's all over with now. Everything's all right."

Several weeks after the beginning of the school term, Seth's kindergarten class went on a field trip to a farm. I volunteered to go along as a chaperone, because I thought it sounded like fun. I took Morgan along with me as well instead of sending her to child care that day. All the little girls in Seth's class gushed over her, saying how cute she was and almost coming to blows over who would sit beside her on the bus.

We rode far out into the country, and the bus finally came to a stop on a dirt road in front of a large field that contained a barn, a silo, and a dozen or so grazing cows. "Look at the cows, Mommy!" Seth exclaimed.

"Moo! Moo!" cried Morgan, jumping up and down excitedly.

The farmer took us on a tour of the farm, where we saw a tractor, a baler, and a combine harvester, and then he showed us the inside of the barn, where we saw sheep, pigs, and chickens.

"Wow, Mommy, it's really big in here!" Seth exclaimed.

"This baby chicken just hatched this morning," the farmer told the children, passing the little ball of fluff around for each child to hold. Morgan cried when I told her she was too small to hold the baby chick because she might crush it. I distracted her by letting her pet a sheep.

At the end of the visit, the farmer let each of the children taste some fresh milk from one of his cows, and then it was time to get back on the bus and return to the school. Morgan, of course, fell asleep almost as soon as the bus began to move. Seth chattered excitedly all the way back. "I'm gonna be a farmer when I grow up," he told me.

"I thought you were gonna be a policeman."

He looked thoughtful for a moment. "I'm gonna be a farmer and a policeman."

On the way home from the school, I had to go through the drive-through at the bank, and by the time we got home, Seth was yawning, but Morgan was wide awake.

The sky was filled with dark, angry storm clouds, but I hardly noticed them as I pulled into the hospital parking lot. I was thinking about a very sweet elderly man, Mr. Johnson, who'd gone into cardiac arrest on my last shift. We'd brought him back, but he was still comatose and unstable. I really hoped that he'd survived the night. Before he'd lost consciousness, he'd been such a pleasant patient, so sweet and kind. He'd reminded me a lot of my grandfather.

"Have you been listening to the weather?" Misty asked when she saw me.

"Not really," I replied.

"There's supposed to be a bad thunderstorm brewing," she told me. I thought about my children, safe at home with Maxim. How I wished I could be home with them! But I had to work because I needed the money.

After performing my regular duties, I went to check on Mr. Johnson and was relieved to see that, although he still hadn't regained consciousness, his vitals were now stable.

Suddenly I heard a loud clap of thunder, and the lights blinked off for just a second and then blinked right back on. I knew that that meant that we had lost power and the backup generator had just kicked on. I was sure that Seth and Morgan would be frightened and was glad that Maxim was there to comfort them.

Even the flurry of activity inside the emergency room couldn't drown out the wind's angry squalls, and as more and more people came in with anxiety symptoms and panic attacks, the floor in front of the door became slick with rain water. Several coronary patients had heart attacks during the night, and one elderly man went into arrest and couldn't be resuscitated. Thankfully, Mr. Johnson never regained consciousness throughout the entire ordeal.

In the early morning hours, the storm finally abated. Although exhausted, I managed to finish my duties but was very glad when it was finally time to go home. As I stepped into the parking lot, I saw that, even though the rain had stopped, there were huge mud puddles all over the place, and limbs that had been broken off trees were scattered all about. A large tree had been blown down and was blocking the road, so I had to take an alternative route home.

As I arrived, I was relieved to see that our house was still standing and that none of the windows were broken. I unlocked the door and entered the house and suddenly felt that I could hardly move. I made my way to the bedroom to find both kids in bed with Maxim. All three of them were fast asleep. Morgan lay in Maxim's arms, and Seth lay snuggled up beside them with one arm thrown over them both. The three of them were absolutely adorable.

Trying to be as quiet as I could, I slipped off my shoes, undressed down to my underwear, put on my pajamas, and lay down beside them. I was asleep within seconds.

I awoke around noon to the delicious aroma of take-out Asian food and suddenly realized that I was famished. I got up and walked into the dining room to find Maxim and the kids in the middle of enjoying their meal. Maxim saw me and grinned. "Good morning, sleepyhead."

"Boy, what a night!" I sat down in front of my waiting plate of hot steaming food. "We had so many patients it was unreal! This old guy had a heart attack right there in the emergency room, and they had to bring the defibrillators out and use them on him right there. Then some kid threw up all over Misty and she had to change clothes, and the roof started leaking, and..."

"Daddy took us to the park," Seth told me. "We didn't wake you up because he said you needed your rest."

"Morgan swing!" Morgan said happily.

"That's right, you sure did!" Maxim smiled.

"All three of you were sound asleep when I got in this morning," I remarked. "I don't know how you slept through all that thunder."

"They didn't," Maxim told me. "It got really bad around midnight. Morgan woke up screaming, so I cuddled in bed with her and told her a story and sang to her. I'd barely gotten her back to sleep when Seth ran into the room. 'I'm scared, Daddy,' he told me. 'Well, hop on up here with us,' I said. He climbed up onto the bed beside us and held onto me and fell asleep that way."

"That's the way you were when I came in," I replied. "The three of you looked so cute together! I almost wanted to stay awake just so I could watch you, but after last night, there was just no way!"

"Well, I hope you're feeling well rested now," Maxim said.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine now," I told him.

Later that month, I got the shock of my life when Chad and Lily showed up together on our doorstep. Lily was holding Luke. "Hi, Lacy," she said. "Guess what? We're married now!"

My mouth dropped open. "You got married and didn't invite me?"

"It was a spur of the moment decision," Chad explained. "I called Lily and she was crying. She'd just caught that guy she was seeing cheating on her. I ran right over, and we patched things up, and here we are!"

"Chad wanted to get married right away, and I didn't see any point in waiting," Lily continued. "We knew we loved each other, so we just went to the justice of the peace and did it right then and there."

"I can't believe you guys actually eloped!" I was still too shocked to be angry.

"To be honest, I have a hard time believing it myself," said Lily. "I never imagined I'd do something like this."

"Well, congratulations, both of you," said Maxim, who'd wandered into the room while we'd been talking. "And hello there, you little cutie!" He tickled Luke, and the baby laughed. He didn't have any teeth yet, and when he opened his mouth, my heart just melted. I looked at Maxim and could tell that he felt the same way.

"We're his legal guardians now," Lily told me. I knew that Trina still hadn't shown any signs of emerging from her coma and had been transferred to a long-term care facility.

"Well, he couldn't have better parents than you two," I told her.

Chad and Lily ended up staying for dinner and visiting for several hours afterwards. Luke was five months old now, and Seth and Morgan both fell in love with him instantly.

"I want a baby brother, Mommy," Seth said after they'd left.

"Maybe you'll have one some day," I told him.