Oh no, secretly masturbating was discovered by my partner!

 For many men, masturbation is like a Pandora's box that's been present since birth. Most males open it during adolescence. Once they've experienced the pleasure, the box often stays open.



Masturbation is one of the simplest ways for men to satisfy their sexual desires. So, it's common for some men who lead relatively isolated lives to become addicted to masturbation. However, as long as it doesn't affect physical health or daily routines, it's a normal way to release sexual energy. A good masturbation habit can relax the body and mind, dispel杂念, and restore focus. It can be very helpful for a man's life and work.



But some non - single men may still masturbate in their free time. If their partners find out, it can lead to conflicts. Why does this happen? A major reason is the female "possession desire."



When they discover their male partner masturbating, women often bombard them with questions like:



"Why do you still watch porn and masturbate when you have me?"



"Do you not love me anymore? Why masturbate when we can have sex?"



"Are you not attracted to me? Have you grown tired of me?"



Many men may feel puzzled and wronged in such situations.



**Masturbation Is Like "Solo Practice"**



Masturbation is essentially harmless. Using sports as a metaphor, masturbation is like individual practice, while sexual intercourse is like a competitive match with a partner. The two are not contradictory.



Individual sports practice can take various forms. For example, basketball players can practice dribbling and shooting alone; tennis and volleyball players can use the force of a ball rebounding off a wall to practice; and badminton players can train their wrist swings and leg strength by playing against a wall. In general, any recreational activity that allows for self - improvement requires solo practice, self - exploration, and self - dialogue.



We know that intimate interaction and mutual adaptation between partners are key in sexual activity. However, such adaptation doesn't happen naturally. It requires couples to explore and磨合 over time. To effectively enhance mutual adaptation in a short period, it's essential to understand each other's minds and bodies, as well as to have self - awareness and understanding.



For instance, you need to know what you like, what excites you, and how to achieve new sensations. Use masturbation to thoroughly explore your body and mind. With this self - knowledge, you can accurately communicate your needs and desires to your partner, helping to create a satisfying sexual life for both of you. In other words, even in the best of relationships, masturbation still plays a role.



**Solo and Partner Modes**



Moreover, masturbation is akin to the "single - player mode" in video games, while sexual intercourse resembles the "multi - player mode." Both solo and partnered play are valid forms of sexual expression and should be viewed positively. Although partnered sex offers more realistic sensory experiences, solo play has its own advantages, such as no need to consider others' feelings, low pressure, no physical exertion, and time - saving. You can control the pace, whether fast or slow, and even fantasize about things you wouldn't normally do, satisfying yourself in a way that's unique to men.



**Communicating with Your Partner**



It's not worth arguing with your partner over masturbation. Instead, communication is key. First, recognize that when a woman discovers her partner masturbating, she may feel hurt and question her self - worth. This is understandable. As a man, reassure her of your deep love and preference for making love together. Explain that you still have additional sexual needs and ask for her understanding. You can also emphasize that you don't want to tire her out and that masturbation helps you quickly relieve sexual tension so you can focus on work. Additionally, tell her that your solo exploration can enhance the sexual experience you share, leading to greater satisfaction for both of you. Over time, she may come to understand and accept this. Of course, when making love together, put in extra effort to show your commitment.



Finally, a reminder for men: if your partner asks whether masturbation or sex with her feels better, be prepared with a thoughtful response.