In a stunning announcement sure to have significant ramifications for the entire world, War today declared victory in its long running conflict with Peace. In dedclaring victory War said the following "At long last, today we have defeated our eternal enemy, peace, once and for all. Humankind is finally free to destroy itself with impunity, killing every last man, woman, and child without worry or fear of some dope smoking hippie ruining their fun by going on and on about giving peace a chance or some dumb crap like that. Stupid hippies."
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Everyday Junglist
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Eastern Standard Time (EST) Taunts Arch Rivals Vows it Will Defeat All Other Time Zones
At a press conference in Las Vegas today heavyweight champion time zone of the world Eastern Standard Time (EST) taunted his arch rivals Central, Mountain, and Pacific Time Zones and challenged any and all comers to a winner take all title fight. EST boasted that “it was his time now” and that he would show the entire world that he is “the greatest of all time.” Continuing his tradition of using humor to frustrate and anger his would be opponents he bad mouthed each of his major North American contenders with a constant stream of insults.
By Everyday Junglist3 years ago in Fiction
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