"This Flesh I Am Encased In"

Ahh, the fresh air feels nice I have laid dormant for too long in this quiet dark space. I may not see but now that this cylinder is open sounds and feelings come rushing in. I have missed this place the smells the sounds take me back in time. When the salty breezes blew through my hair the night, I married my lover. Every year we returned to celebrate our love “beach hair don’t care” we would laugh. But, I do not feel my hair and I can not see the shore. The sound Oh I would know those sounds anywhere. Sometimes I would call to alexia to recreate the sounds and my body would just melt. It is crazy, even my body feels strange. I hear the voice of my children and grandchildren, but they can not hear me. This is so weird. Oh, I remember! Ashes to ashes and dust to dust, I have laid in wait of this day when my ashes would be given to the sea. I never thought I would know.

Wow freely I fly, the voices become silent now only the echo of the boat is heard through the water. I gently filter through the cool salty water. What! This cannot be! I have... I can see! This beautiful watery world that I have been so curious about my whole life. There are no birds singing but I hear sounds I can not identify. I feel the strength of my body as I move swiftly as though flying. I see a school of fish ahead. I can not wait to get to them I am amazed at the colors as they shine in the reflections of the sun.

As I get closer, I feel desire arising from the desire to eat. WHAT! NO, I strain against this new body I can not eat God’s beautiful creation. My fellow fish. What is wrong with me I just want to explore and enjoy this beautiful world. To live in peace. Quickly I turn, I have won the battle against the flesh I am encased in.

As I swim through the wreckage of the boat, I remember the life I had, the beautiful children I left behind. Do they know I loved them? I know I made plenty of mistakes. Did I fail to pass on my faith and the love God has imparted into my heart? There was a time, my life felt just like this boat hopelessly wrecked. I swim by a mirror and see my reflection. I am a shark! Well, I may be a shark, but I do not have to act like one. I refuse to devour my fellow fish! I refuse to go through this time as when I walked on two legs. It is not all about me my needs and my desires. Father let my spirit reign over this flesh.

It has been days since I have eaten the diet this flesh desires; I have chopped on some seaweed throughout the days. The other sharks sneer as they glide by. I imagine their thoughts on how stupid I am. Furthermore, don’t I know I am a shark, a predator no doubt. The bully of the sea! All the fish run from me. I am very lonely.

That is it! I am going to crystal beach. Maybe just maybe some of the kids will be there. Just to see their smiling faces frolicking in the water I know will help. Certainly, it could not hurt.

The sun is almost gone hard to see the shore I must get closer. What is that smell it draws me like no other? I feel sensations and instincts kicking in the closer I get the stronger the desire rises. A boy has cut his foot on the oyster shells the blood wafters through the water calling in the predators and me.

Brad what are you doing in the water this late get out! But he cannot hear me, and he does not see the crowd he is drawing. RUN!!! RUN!!! Before I realized what I had done my teeth ripped into the flesh tearing it apart! The and the feeding frenzy had begun. The water swishing blood bubbling up with each bite. It was horrible. Then I was free

Free of the flesh that encased me! My spirit floated up to heaven, as I looked down I seen brad reach the shore. When I attacked the lead shark in his path. I must have startled him. Then all the other sharks turned on me ripping me apart. It was worth it.

We read in the bible in James chapter 4 verse (14 you who do not know what will happen tomorrow, what your life will be like. For you are a smoky vapor that appears for a short time and then disappears. 15 Instead you should say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.”) Make your life count!!