the EYES

the EYES

All eyes were on one single spot. The scene was so revolting that except some, others tried to avert their eyes. Some others with children tried to cover their kids’ eyes and averted their own.

“Doesn’t anyone plan to pick this miserable corpse up?” A man in the crowd yelled. Another man, tossing his head, said: “I just ruined my whole day. You’re going to work just in the morning when you face this scene right at the foot of your apartment. Gosh, what an amazing start! When on earth is this damn thing gonna end?”

schoolchildren, standing some feet over there, headed to their school with tearful eyes. It was not the first time that people have witnessed such incidents in the past months; no one knew the reason, though.

*******

That day he went for a little walk to Main Square. He looked around and hastily crossed the street. It was a bit cool and a mild breeze blew into his hair. He was going to walk there for a short while before going back home when a big store across the square caught his eye. He pondered for a bit. It was not a bad idea to go and take a look. Since his childhood, he has loved shops with big, luminous windows; this store had of such: large, beautiful, and chic.

He did not usually come to this part of town for walking. He would sometimes pay this busy neighborhood a visit. Last time when he wanted to take a look at the store, changed his mind. It was crowded around, and a bunch of people was circling around something he couldn’t see. He tried to sneak a peek, but it was not possible. It was the same today. There was a dozen or two, standing on the sidewalk with a couple of kids among them. He would like to go and find out what that was; however, he was not in the mood of standing in the crowdedness. He would rather go and return some days later. It was a little late; so, he hurried to get home on time.

***

He glanced at the clock on the wall. It was some minutes past 8. He had planned to head straight downtown instead of spending time in the park near his house. If he went early morning, he did not get stuck in traffic and crowd. As soon as he ate his breakfast, he went. As he was getting passed the park, met some of his friends. He approached them and began talking.

- Hey guys. What’s up?

- Fine. What’s up with you? Long time, no see!

- I’m just around. I occasionally go to the other park here.

- What are you up to today?

- I’m going downtown.

- What’s special there?

- Just spend time. I wanna take a look at that big store there.

- It’s rumored that place is bewitching!

He sat and laughed his heart out.

- Come on! Curses and stuff are jokes.

- Don’t you know?

- Yeah, I’ve heard some stories, but all are some incidents after all. Stop fooling yourselves.

- We told you so. Are you really going there now?

- I was going to, but you two rambled and yammered so much that it got late. I can’t make it today. It’s tomorrow’s business, maybe the day after. I gotta go, guys. Bye for now.

With a pregnant sneer, he glanced at them, said goodbye, and headed home.

***

It had been pouring since the first hours of the morning. He took a quick look out of the window. He stood up and wandered around the house. He had no special plans for the day. He felt like strolling downtown, did not know, however, if it is a good idea to go there in this heavy rain. The last time he had gone out in rain, had caught a terrible cold that took his about a month to recover from. Besides, he had taken so many medicines and antibiotics that he lost six pounds.

He took another glance outside. It was raining less heavily. He went to the kitchen and saw there was no one there. Then he went back to the building entrance and stepped his feet on the doormat.

He took a long, deep breath. It was perfectly pleasant, and it was drizzling. He made up his mind. On the way, he greeted some friends and hurriedly reached Main Square. Watching the traffic light, crossed the street. He walk some steps when saw himself at the store entrance. It was open; he wanted to go in, but he couldn’t. He waited for some brief seconds, looked around, and rushed back home as quickly as he could.

He felt his mouth was dry. He grabbed the water hose in the yard and drank nonstop, but his mouth was still dry. He hastily went inside and covered himself under a blanket. He felt had a fever, he felt freezing, though. He did not know what was wrong with his. The frenzy of occurrences had made his insane. His friends were right; he had undoubtedly become haunted.

***

The day after he woke up later than usual. He climbed the stairs up and down a number of times, went to the kitchen, and two or three times went to the yard. He was doing all his best to forget what had happened the day before; it was not a big deal after all. He wondered why that incident had kept his thinking since last night. It was ridiculous. He wanted to get over it and get back to normal life; that was it.

He once again went back to the kitchen and took a look at the food on the table. It was some time that he had grown a little heavy, so he was watching what he ate. Nevertheless, to cheer himself up picked some and headed to the yard. He wandered around and sat at under the sunlight for a while. Then – as usual – got ready to go for his morning walk.

He saw a friend of his there in the park.

- Hey buddy.

- Hey! How are things with you?

- Nothing much. I just went to Main Square.

- You finally did it?

- Yep. I’m not superstitious like you. I went around that store, too. See! I’m not bewitched or haunted. You don’t seem like one that cares much about what people say!

- You seriously went there? Are you okay now? Thanks god nothing happened to you! I won’t risk it, anyway. Why should I do something that I might regret? Stop being dogged.

- Fine! Don’t make a big deal out of it. I’m going back home. You coming with me?

- No, you go. I need to do something.

- Bye for now, then.

He looked around, crossed the street, and got himself into the sidewalk. He was walking slowly, trying to make himself believe that nothing had happened; but it HAD. He was very well aware that what should not have occurred, HAD.

***

He spent tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, and some other days as his ordinary life. He got up, had breakfast, wandered up and down in the yard, walked in the park, returned home, ate again, yard again, and slept in the end. He tried to keep it as routine as possible, even more, and not even let his schedule be a second different, and he was to a good extent successful.

But that Monday messed all his plans up. As soon as he woke up, he looked around; yawned, and lay down again. Suddenly, his eyes became fixed on the photo on the wall. Even though he wholeheartedly insisted that everything was normal, he knew very well that nothing is normal. Something in his had changed. He must go; he must see, he must stay gazing; he must stand there. He must learn what on earth was wrong with him.

It was noon yet when he made up his mind. He gave up all his daily routine. He freshened up, combed and brushed his hair, and went. He had to give in to the curse. He had to carve that out in his soul. He had to quit fear and embrace that curse sincerely. It was the first time that such a fear had penetrated into his soul. He wanted to learn, find, feel, and that day was the best day. He might not have such an opportunity anymore.

***

Roughly at 11, he was just at the store. He waited for a bit and run around in circles once or twice. For some time he tried to forget about everything and return. “What’s the urge in it? Why should I put myself in trouble by my own hands?” He thought to himself. He was not able to resist the urge; he must go. He must go to the end of it. Once he approached the store entrance, he began to breathe heavily and panted louder and louder. He felt if he had kept still, his heart would have fallen out of his mouth. Hastily, he reached the entrance and stood where he had seen that the very first time. He had been standing exactly at that spot; the very same glamor, with those very ocean-blue eyes.

He stood there staring at that for hours. Time had stopped for him. He did not know whether it was afternoon or evening, whether it was lunchtime or it was way past dinnertime. He was just sitting and staring. He, for some minutes, felt those eyes were staring still at him, too. Sky-blue they were. He was watching them ceaselessly. His soul was overflowing with something strange, an endless feeling, a charming bewitchment, an indescribable feeling – indescribable with any words.

He was reawakened as the store shutters were closing. He had not been feeling the passing of time at all. He had been staying there without even a moment not thinking about those eyes. His strange feeling was comparable to nothing. He did not know how – at one single sight – that bewitchment had penetrated into his bone. That day, he gazed into them for hours, and with each moment he fell more in love with those eyes. They were blue, sky-blue; maybe ocean-deep blue. He had not seen the ocean so far, but he had once seen that in a postcard on the wall. It was alluring, dignified, and BLUE. And now, it was some days that he had been plunged into the ocean, or maybe drowned.

- Move aside!

A hasty passerby’s angry voice brought his back to himself. He looked around, and run fast back home. Everyone very definitely worried about him. He had no clue what excuse he should give. He made up his mind: he would go in from the backdoor and go to sleep without having dinner. He would be hungry until morning, but he would not be interrogated.

***

The day after he got up a little earlier, washed up, and got ready. He had made up his mind. He wanted to go. He wanted to take a leap in the dark. He had not slept a wink; he had been preoccupied with loads of thoughts. A number of times he had almost forgotten about what he wanted to do, but each time in the dark his eyes were absorbed by that postcard on the wall. He had remembered that everlasting blue, and then there he went again. After all, he would like to, for once in his life, let himself in the ocean, in the waves that kiss the shore and hug the horizon; what ocean would be better than this ocean? He took in a deep breath. Once again, he looked at himself head to toe and went.

Once he arrived at the Square, he was almost out of breath; but this time, it was different. Even the way he breathed was different. Everything was weirdly unusual. This time, he was not worried. He had unknown feelings, but it was alright. He liked the feeling he was experiencing. He was going to take a leap into the ocean. “As soon as she turns her head and sees me, I will gaze at him and reveal everything with my eyes. Eyes will surely say everything.” He thought to himself.

He remembered that when he was a child, his mother had told him how she had met his father. His mother used to tell this story so enthusiastically that he would never get tired of listening to it. As his mother said, they had first met at the fence of a farm. She said it was one sight and it was over. Supposedly, his mom was once before drowned in the same ocean. His father’s eyes were blue, too. His mother was also out of breath with a fever; interestingly, his mother had also learned what had happened. She did not fall ill; she did not seem like the sick, she was only drowned in those eyes. His mother said everyone assumes that love is in the heart, but what unveils it is the eyes. If eyes get drowned, it means everything is over. His mother had told him “The day when you saw two eyes looking at you with love, know that everything is over”. And that day, those two blue eyes kept staring at his eyes; for seconds, minutes, hours, …

***

It had become his routine. He would get up, wash up, scrutinize himself in the mirror, eat his breakfast quickly, and go. It was ten days that he had been waiting for her, not taking his eyes off her. He had not yet been able to attract his attention. It did not matter that much. Everything is not to happen all at once. She was always busy in that store. Sometimes, it took hours and she was snowed under the workload. Just yesterday, for instance, she was not even able to move until night. So, he must be patient. He will eventually unite his eyes with hers. Is it really possible that two eyes will not ever communicate at all?!

***

He did not feel very well that day. He had planned not to visit her again. Everyone at home was complaining about his irregularly going out and coming back. All the nagging aside, after a month and a half, she had not even given him half a glimpse. It is hard to believe! Was his mother wrong? Let’s imagine she had changed her mind; she had seen him at a glance, and she had second thoughts – that is it. But at least, she deserved a frown, she deserved avoidance, or she could come and talk, yell, scream; she ought to do something for god’s sake. Suspense is a terrible state. It is as if you were hanging from a gallows, and there was someone with a pair of scissors in hand; you were swinging, and every now and then he brought the scissors just near the rope; you were suffocating, and he was still there; and you were still hopeful that on the last breath, he cut the rope and you were able to breathe again. He did not know what to do. He must take an action. He must make a decision. The end result was of no importance, he only wanted to be able to breathe again. He would like them to drown together – but what if he would not? He must tell him the final words with his eyes. It would either give his breath back or the rope would choke him to death.

***

It was three days that he had not seen her; three days since the day he had promised himself to break everything up. He was haunted by a curious fear. Although he had resigned himself to getting any response that would be better than that suspense, in his heart he was looking for something else. He was afraid that those two ocean eyes rejected him. He was afraid to tell him there had been no look, no feeling, no rope. But no, it was only some days ago when she had not stopped looking at him. He was not wrong; those two ocean eyes were also enchanted by his night-dark eyes. But what if she had changed her mind since that day? If that was only the first sight and nothing more? If she had told him she had been looking at the wall behind him? Oh god, he was going crazy. He had been preoccupied with various thoughts since the early morning he had woken up. Although he had promised himself to break everything up under any circumstances and say what he feels at heart to her – with whatever result it yielded, he was still fearful. He went to the mirror and looked at himself. He felt half of his hair had gone white in the past couple of months.

***

He stood up and moved. He had taken his ultimate decision; he preferred his last breath to this uncertainty. He freshened up and went. He remembered the day his father was dying. He was healthy and young. One day he was going along that busy street, where the store is now located when he was hit by a car. The accident was so severe that his bones were all broken. Technically, there was no need for a doctor or medicine. It was over. He was just brought home to take in his last breaths at his own house. Everyone was gathering around him, and his mother was constantly crying. Some seconds passed, and his father expired. He would never forget it. Just in that last breath, his eyes were fixed on his mother. It was as if those eyes were the only pacifiers, and he only knew those eyes when it came to farewell.

That day, when he was looking at himself, he figured out something peculiar. He looked a lot like his father: his face, cheeks, hair color, and eyes. That day, he was looking at everything with his father’s eyes. He would like to carefully look at the whole way, all his friends, every and each store again and again. On his way, he went to the park nearby. He greeted and talked with his friends for a while and went. For some minutes, he stayed at the water fountain in the middle of a square on his way watching the drops of water. The nearer he was getting to Main Square, the faster his heart would beat. It was only a few steps. He reached the store. She was there, too; not in his regular spot, she was sitting some feet away with his blue eyes staring at him. He went forward as much as he could sit right in front of her. He gazed at her and poured whatever he had in his heart into his eyes. Hours passed, but those ocean eyes did not even give him half a glimpse. He stood up, moved around, and once again sit right in front of her – for hours and hours. It had gotten cold. The day passed, and night arrived, and he was still gazing at her. His eyes were tearful. His heart began to ache. He thought that all those years his mother was lying to him. He dropped his head to hide his tears from everyone.

*******

An old man angrily shook his stick in the air:

- I say there is someone who has problems with these miserable dogs. This dog is obviously healthy and domestic. See! He’s wearing a collar, it’s very expensive, too. Someone look at the collar for god’s sake. There may be an address, phone number, or something on it. We could at least find the owner.

- Who has a problem with these innocents? I guess the police have to interfere.

- I believe whoever does this is one of the store’s staff or salespeople. My son has a shop just down this street. He says the first time that a dog’s dead body was found here was exactly some after this store opened. Whatever this is, is their fault. I didn’t feel any good about this store from the beginning.

- Are you serious? If you knew this, why didn’t you call the police? Such nasty people are as poison to society. They must not live among the sane.

As soon as the corpse was collected, the crowd gradually scattered. The only one who was still there was a young girl who had gotten a job in the store some days before. The young girl had a lump in her throat, but she managed not to cry. As she was going back to her job, those blue eyes caught her eye. She was in shock for moments, and suddenly it was tears that running down on her cheeks.

It was 8 in the morning. The store’s shutters were not fully open so she got herself to the manager’s office.

- Hello ma’am. May I interrupt you for a minute?

- Oh, dear! It’s been only three days since you started working here. What is the big deal with you? I’m tied up. Say it quick and go.

- May I remove that taxidermized white dog from the window?

- Which dog?

- That blue-eyed one with a red silk scarf around its neck.

- Are you out of your mind? Do you know how much we paid for that? It is the jewel in our window, especially with that white hair and those remarkable blue eyes. It is so beautiful that I sometimes stand outside the store and watch it. now you say that we remove it?

- Well, …

- Go back to the check-out. There are plenty of customers in lines. What on earth is your business with the window?

The young girl went back to the check-out dejectedly when her eyes sparkled.

- Ma’am. Ma’am.

- What is it again?

- I meant it won’t be a bad idea to put one of our pairs of sunglasses on her eyes. You know how fancy will it look?

- I don’t know! It doesn’t sound bad. But, what about its blue eyes?

- I guess, her eyes have bored the people a little. We can make them more interesting with a pair of unique sunglasses.

- I like the idea! Bravo! You do it!

The young girl went carefully inside the window. He grabbed the darkest-panned sunglasses and dressed those blue eyes with them. He stood in front of the dog and looked carefully at her. She was sure that no dog would die in front of that window anymore.