Tainted Love

As Sarah walks away, she can’t help but feel an immense amount of guilt. She’s walking away from the person she loves, obviously she’s going to feel some amount of guilt, but the amount she is feeling is overwhelming, it takes over her. They were never meant to be together anyways, she shouldn’t feel this guilty. He’s the one that decided it was best to do this, Sarah never agreed, but he dragged her along anyway. I mean why would he try and get her drunk anyways, he knew that she used to be a raging alcoholic, and now she has been clean for a full year.

He told Sarah to get dressed up that they were going out tonight, she was hesitant but it sounded like a good time. She got all dolled up, looking ever so pretty, but then they showed up, at a bar. She immediately got upset but decided that she would go in anyways, that she had enough self-control to have fun without a drink. But of course, she ended up drinking a lot, and was pretty drunk but not completely when she noticed that Josh was flirting with a girl, and then she saw them kiss. It wasn’t fair, and she completely lost her temper. He had taken HER out for a fun night and now he’s cheating on her, it’s even worse than if he had gone out by himself to cheat on her. She got pissed and dragged him outside to talk to him.

They got outside, Josh completely dazed and confused why Sara had running mascara and looked furious.

“You really thought you could take ME out and then start hitting on other girls?!!” Sarah yelled at him.

“Let's not do this right now, we’re both drunk, let's calm down.” He responded, slurring his words.

“Oh no you don’t, we are talking about this right now. I don’t care how drunk we are. This is your fault.” She says confidently despite the tears running down her face.

“I’M SORRY” Josh cries out, a sudden shift in mood as he regrets all he’s done. This wasn’t his first time cheating on her.

“SURE” she replies, rolling her eyes. The truth is now right in front of her.

Josh takes a step towards the edge of the cliff the bar is on, “What are you doing?” Sarah asks incredulously.

“I feel so bad, I don’t deserve to live-” he cries out, running towards the edge before ultimately jumping saying one last thing as he goes down, “I always loved you Sarah, I’m so sorry…”

Sarah stands there, shocked at what just happened. She just witnessed a su!c!de and part of it is her fault, maybe if she hadn’t yelled at him and waited until they were calmed down-. She immediately dials 911 making sure to change her voice some so that she can’t be identified.

“911 what’s your emergency” a female responder asks.

“Someone just jumped off the cliff by the bar on Tulip Street” Sarah responds before hanging up.

She takes one last look at where she last saw Josh and she turns around slowly, guilt and sadness enveloping her, along with a feeling of… freedom. She runs to her car as fast as she can, not wanting to be accused of murder. She immediately goes home, packs up her stuff and leaves town, grateful to be free from a relationship she didn’t even realize was toxic until now.

For years after this, she has flashbacks of the night he died, and all the times he was a jerk and she hadn’t noticed. It haunts her that his death was partly her fault, but she never turns herself in.