Seller’s Market

I should have known better than to place a bid sight unseen!

Everyone always tells you: if you’re looking to buy property properly— TOUR IT FIRST!!!

Unfortunately it’s easy to make an absolute dump heap look like a steal, if a seller is crafty with the presentation!

It’s kinda like how you can exaggerate the size of an o next if you capture an image from the right angle.

Well I was stupid.

I saw the listing on what looked like a nice little property and the asking price seemed too good to be true. So I placed a bid— in this market I felt like I had to jump at the opportunity before someone else snatched it up.

You know how it is. These past few quarters, buyers have been bidding 60-80% over ask, and waving inspections, to strengthen their bids.

Well, I really regret caving to the pressure.

I placed a bid 30% over asking price, waved the inspection and never even conducted an in person tour.

Actually felt good about the whole thing— until I made the trip out and saw the place. Before I even set foot on my purchase I could tell I’d made a terrible mistake.

Even from inside my vehicle, I could see signs of infestation.

The first time I actually set foot on my new property I discovered it hadn’t been cleaned in ages.

Every surface is crawling with gross, disgusting little vermin. The sale was final so now I need to figure out a way to wipe these pests out completely. I can't even afford an exterminator, since I just sank so much money into this idiotic purchase.

So I'm stuck with a place I really don't want and never would have purchased if I had known ahead of time. Before I can ever relax there in peace I'll need to do some serious cleaning.

I suppose I can try and wipe out those nasty little buggers myself but I wouldn't know where to begin. And I really don't want to get in over my head. The way they fester and crawl just gives me the creeps.

I'm also, truth be told, a little bit worried that if I stir up their colonies they might get aggressive. I’ve never seen creatures quite like them, so I’m really not sure what to expect. Are they territorial? Are they coordinated?

I don’t even know the best way to kill them.

And I can’t just hit them with fire, I need to be careful not to damage my purchase in the process.

For now, I guess I’m really just venting.

I definitely don't want to set foot there again, though I suppose I must.

I gotta just toughen up and get into it. I’ll start by capturing a few of those yucky little critters.

Perhaps I can study them to determine their fatal weaknesses.

Wish me luck!

Now that I’ve bought this shithole called Earth, I’ve definitely got my work cut out for me.