I know how God feels. Forced to listen to you, crying for what you want. Giving you food and shelter. Even love. Still expected to clean up your shit. You should worship me. Bring gifts. Sacrifices. Hell, the cat brings me a dead mouse. She knows what’s up. Knows the hell I can rain down from above. Treat your god well. Show the appreciation He deserves. Give him a song and dance once in a while. Even Jesus’ daddy had an angry side. Look what happened to him. All right, all right. Quiet down. I’m looking for the damn wipes.
About the Creator
Sean A.
A happy guy that tends to write a little cynically. Just my way of dealing with the world outside my joyous little bubble.
If You Love Me, You'll Do It
I met Jason when I was five years old. I could say that I loved him from the moment I saw him. He was so handsome to me and I felt in awe by his presence. When they introduced him as the new kid in school, I wanted to be his friend right away. I remember it like it was yesterday. I remember his smile and how he didn't seem shy. He appeared confident and ready to learn. I waved at him and said "hello," before anyone else could even say a word. He sat next to me, and I asked him if he wanted to be friends. He looked so happy as he said, "Yes!"
By Sidney Smith (Sid Smith)7 days ago in Fiction
Comments (6)
This took me a second read to get what's up 😁
Well-wrought and very amusing! My favorite version of the old man in the sky has to be George Burns in the "Oh, God!" films, especially since, in one of them, he played the devil too! Also gotta give a nod to Morgan Freeman in "Bruce Almighty" and Alanis Morrissette in "Dogma"!
Cleverly done, Shaun! Hope you found the wipes before things went nuclear!
The wipes are where the little dictator has hidden them, of course. lol
Very clever, Shaun! The cat is clearly on to something.
Ha ha! We've all been there with our tiny tyrants! Made me laugh!