In the Stillness of the Night
For Ray's Oh Jeff Unofficial Challenge
Ray's Oh Jeff Flash Fiction Contest
"Oh, Jeff...I love you, too...but..."
He pulls the phone from his ear slowly and sighs.
She continues to speak, her voice tinny, unreal. But he has stopped listening.
He remembers better days when they rarely argued, her eyes so wet with love that he was sometimes embarrassed to return her gaze.
Slowly raising the phone again, he hears her ask him, "Don't you have anything to say?"
"Please don't go," he whispers.
"We've been over this before, Jeff. I need more than please."
"Please," he replies hoarsely.
"Goodbye, Jeff."
Slowly he lowers the phone to the desk and opens the drawer and gazes for a long time at the pistol resting there.
A single shot rings out in the stillness of the night.
____________________
123 Words
Be safe during the holidays. If needed, reach out to the national suicide hot line by dialing or texting 9-8-8
About the Creator
John Cox
Twisted teller of mind bending tales. I never met a myth I didn't love or a subject that I couldn't twist out of joint. I have a little something for almost everyone here. Cept AI. Aint got none of that.
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Comments (22)
Please forgive the clumsy cut and paste. I would like to publish your entry (or entries) to the Oh-Jeff challenge in an upcoming book and of course need your permission to do so. Details are all here: https://shopping-feedback.today/writers/oh-jeff-the-book%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E Thanks, Ray
Oh this was sad 😿
So tragic … well done ✅
Oh that ending, even after reading that he moved the phone from his ear and was not listening, it skilfully did not prepare me for what was to come. Outstanding work John 👏🏽👌🏽
Back to say congratulations for the leaderboard mention.
I didn't see that coming, but important to write about...losing someone who has been so integral to our own psyche can be devastating. Wish you had included a suicide hot line number. :( Especially around the holidays for some. You made us feel and congrats on the leaderboard. Maybe a content warning?
Heyyyy John! Congratulations on your Leaderboard placement! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
Quite sobering but all so very pivotal and dynamic in few words.
WOW that was intense! Fabulous writing!
I wrote a dead one too. tragic but true. People die for love. 8 billion people in the world just waiting to find love. just keep looking, maybe.
ah you bastid! actually teared up! 123 words to tears! masterful, John, seriously!
Well, that was final and very dramatic! Nice entry, my friend!
My heart broke so much for Jeff. His pain was so palpable 🥺
Oh no!! How sad! This was quite the tragedy in just a few words
She should have listened to his plea, not the please.
Oh no, Jeff. 😬
Wow! That was intense. Well written!
Wow, that gave me a chill. Powerful.
Yikes! NOW she's gonna be sorry. (But she'll probably get over it.)
Tragic. More fish, Jeff. There are more fish!
Ouch! She really can be replaced. Tough story, John.
Oh such a desolate ending. Ne me quite pas. Really evocative story, John and thanks for joining in