Cindy's Pond

Cindy said that she found her father’s naked body near the pond in the backyard of their house. She claimed he was lying face down on his right side, with his lower half still in water and upper half on land when she came upon him. He had died almost immediately because there were no signs of struggle.

The police confirmed that Cindy's story is accurate; they added it has been drizzling for days and so a puddle formed by the creek near the stream running at the back of the house would have made it easy to drown. Charles' body had hardly any marks on it.

The autopsy report suggests that he drowned within 12-24 hours before his corpse was discovered, and the time of death varied between midnight and 2 a.m. There were no signs of violence on Charles’ body or in the house, which meant there was no struggle prior to his death; however this brought about many questions from those closest to him: how did he end up at the pond? And what was he doing by himself when everyone else was asleep?

The pond at the back of their house had always been a source of fear for Cindy as well as the rest of her family. It was often their custom to gather around the campfire in this backyard, but everyone agreed that they would only have done so if it was summertime and not cold outside; however, even during summer evenings, most members of the family preferred to spend time indoors instead.

There were many times when Cindy had skipped out on camping by herself or with friends because she said she didn't like being near that pond. She thought it was too close to the house; she felt getting closer would have been like inviting a disaster in. Charles, however, had always been the one to push her out of this comfort zone. Cindy said whenever she complained about that pond being too close to their house because it was dangerous, he would say: “It’s not hard for a person to find peace in nature; all you need is the desire to do so and a little courage. You’re capable of it – just try and you will succeed!”

Cindy felt like there was something mysterious lurking around the pond and she wanted nothing to do with it; yet she also felt guilty for allowing those fears to get in her way.

She knew she was being silly, yet she couldn’t seem to get over her feelings of fear about the pond. She felt uneasy whenever they had a BBQ in the backyard, or even when she found herself too close to that place; that was why she avoided it as much as possible.

Cindy would often ask herself: what will happen if I overcome my fear and go near the pond? Will something pop out of nowhere and try to hurt me? Or will it be fine once I get over the idea that this place is scary? But even after asking those questions, Cindy could never give herself a straight answer.

She was not in denial about her fears. She knew she might have been silly for fearing that place as much as she did; she wanted to conquer her fears, yet couldn’t; therefore she chalked it up to her being too weak.

Cindy once asked her father why he wanted to spend so much time around nature when it was clear that peace and solace were hard things to find in the wilderness. He simply answered: “Personal happiness doesn’t just come from who you have as friends, or what you do for a living… It also comes from how peaceful you feel, whether deep inside you or at the surface of your heart. To be surrounded by beauty is itself a gift given only to us humans!”

Cindy thought it was an odd thing to say; her father had always been more of a practical sort than someone who focused on the trivialities of life. She felt he only said that because he knew she was afraid of the pond, but she still couldn’t get over how bizarre his response seemed.

The campfire they used for most of these BBQs were positioned behind their house in order to avoid any dangerous situations involving sparks from going too close to an area covered with dry grass and leaves. At one point, Charles suggested they consider moving it closer to the pond which would have saved them time when cooking dinner. Cindy nixed that idea instantly saying “but that place is so scary!” Her father had replied with: “It’s our responsibility to get rid of those bad feelings, Cindy. A change of perspective can make a huge difference; there are lots of things out there which aren't scary after all! It's just that most people fail to see the beauty hidden in plain view.” Her father’s reply left Cindy feeling even more confused about the meaning of beauty.

Charles had always been a man of few words; whenever he did start to talk, it was usually because he felt there were things that needed explaining. This attitude made him difficult to talk to at times, yet also very interesting. His thoughts were poetic; his observations seemed spot on despite the fact they were delivered in a roundabout way. Cindy often wondered if she came up with her own ideas by listening carefully to what her father said during dinner conversations or when she overheard one of his arguments with other people working around their house – or maybe some combination of those three scenarios? If only I could figure out how he thinks! She said to herself.

She wondered how her father could see something as beautiful like the pond when she saw it as something that was out of place, and scary to boot! This realization made Cindy feel worse about herself. She always knew she wasn’t the smartest person in the world; she never liked studying nor worked hard at anything; if only I work harder at doing things people tell me will help me grow up into a better person then I can one day be accepted by others… But what sort of things were those? Cindy didn’t know. Her father had told her many times before that life was easier for people who were more adaptable - especially during challenging situations - but being “adaptable” was a difficult thing to be in her mind.

Cindy wanted to ask more questions about what made the pond so beautiful, but there were always too many people around to do it right then and there. So she waited until she was alone with her mother at home one day; once they were both sitting in their favorite armchairs in the living room - Cindy said: “Mom? There’s something I want to ask you...”

She had been feeling anxious all the time ever since that conversation with Charles by the campfire. She knew full well that she shouldn’t let such thoughts keep her up at night, but thoughts are hard things to control sometimes! Thoughts kept coming no matter what she did. Even while she was playing with the other children at school, or when her mother took her to the market - Cindy couldn’t help but think: am I really a low-life who can't do anything well? She didn’t like thinking these thoughts; it was painful to be reminded of them all the time!

She began by saying “Mom, my father said tonight that he thinks we should move our BBQ location closer to the pond so that we can use it for dinner too... and… I told him no, because nobody likes that place and I feel scared about going near it. He looked very sad after hearing me say that; I think he was hurt by what I said. I want to know what you think about the green light that sometimes appears in that place so that I can explain it better to him when he gets home from work; do you have any ideas?”

Cindy’s mother stayed quiet; she had always been a kind person, and very good at explaining things. She was also very smart too - although she never went to school past grade six – before moving away with her parents during high school in order to earn money for the whole family by working as a nanny for an influential couple who lived in one of the wealthiest parts of the city. When Cindy asked her what thoughts were going through her head while they talked, Marie –Just smiled without saying anything. She'd learned long ago that it was better to listen a lot more than she spoke, especially when talking with Cindy’s father. It was also easier for her to listen and learn about humans if they weren’t speaking to her directly; people either lie or tell half-truths when taking part in direct conversations because of the way our brains are wired - so whenever possible, Marie preferred to watch what others did while listening carefully. That way she could learn more about how people were feeling and what they really wanted.

Marie saw Cindy’s father as someone who had a lot of middle-class sensibilities, mostly because of the way that he talked - especially when arguing with other adults. She saw him to be an incurable romantic too; something that she found both endearing and perplexing because even though it was never mentioned aloud, she knew from observing him in her everyday life that he wasn’t nearly so idealistic and silly when hanging out with his friends after work at night during those rare times he did drink alcohol while socializing with them (he usually just drank soda instead for health reasons). Marie always found him to be more like the person he seemed to be when she first met him. He was so idealistic and romantic in those situations that it sometimes made her want to smile out loud at just how silly some of the things that came out of his mouth really were.

Marie had been watching him from her bedroom window ever since the green light first appeared by the pond; she saw Cindy’s father come out there almost every evening just before sunset to sit with his back against a tree, just staring into the greenish water as it glowed in a way that was different from anything else she had ever seen anywhere else. It wasn’t obvious at first: but after spending some time watching him - Marie started noticing little signs of how worried he seemed to be about something. He sometimes cried quietly to himself when no one was nearby, and then would rush back indoors during those times without telling anyone where he had gone or what he did while outside. She also noticed that whenever people did ask him what his green light was, he just always seemed to blush, stutter and then say something like “it’s a long story… I don’t think you’d believe me if I told you anyway. It's complicated... that green light sometimes makes me feel very scared you know?” A short time after she noticed Cindy trying to convince her father that the green light is dangerous at night - but whenever they did have a normal conversation, she found him saying things such as: 'I wish you could just enjoy it too sometimes… it's not hurting anyone, and nothing bad is going to happen here while I'm still alive. After Cindy's father passed away she continued to stare at the pond at night as the green light slowly makes it's way closer to her window inch by inch each night, she forces herself to overcome her fear searching for the beauty within the light.