Blue & Grey

Meera would often dream.

It was the only fortress she had once the battle for sleep had finally been won. Once again, she could escape to a world opposite to hers and experience what she could only understand to be happiness.

Not often would she remember these dreams, except for one that was imprinted in her memory.

She would be transformed into a singular Black Barn Owl, flying to the highest point in the night sky. Aware of the dangers that circled below. Engulfed by the darkness of the peaceful night.

There was no specific location, no landmarks to recognise. Just the vast sea of darkness and all the promise and serenity that came with it.

Freedom was all she felt. No fear for how high she would soar. Observing her soot-coloured wings as they held her close to the cold night air. She felt herself but at the same time not.

It was not often the case that Meera thought herself a beauty, not often at all. However, while she so delicately floated and glided through the welcoming darkness, she couldn’t help but think maybe there was a shine to her dullness that she could appreciate.

It was a relief to her, to be so far away from the heavy, bleak ground below. Whenever she would look down it would seem to be only a black hole. Waiting patiently to swallow her up should she dare to ever get close to it.

So, she wouldn’t.

In the sky she felt safe, a comfort. The glow of the pearl moon and the scattered stars that burned brightly like candles in an undisturbed church. She was alone but not lonely as she glided through this existence.

Unaware of any conscious thoughts that plagued her mind, totally focused on the infinite canvas that lay before her.

She didn’t feel worthless up here.

Unboxed and unbroken, free of the overwhelming chains that would capture and ensnare her each time she opened her eyes to the morning light.

In this time of her unconsciously moving forward, it felt like a reason, not a mistake for her to exist here. A purpose that was only for her.

There did not need to be any worry or consequence for any action she took. No pre-made plan or finish line with a ticking clock echoing in her head. No chance of failure, she could not take a wrong turn up here in this heaven of emptiness.

Sometimes, she would be mirrored by other companions seeking refuge in the night sky. Gently sweeping by so as to not to destroy the illusion, close enough though for Meera to contemplate the coat of black that they also wore under the unassuming spotlight of the moons glow.

It was a true sight indeed to see a creature like herself, unique and unheard of, now duplicated in what she had always felt her own personal isolated freedom. What chains held these suffering souls down she wondered.

Meera knew the dream was not infinite. This space that was safe, where she felt unguarded and capable, would soon be consumed by the raging black hole that was ever-present beneath her.

Hungry for the effervescent night sky. Restless to consume the optimism that laced through the darkness and the hope that each burning star carried.

As fast as Meera soared through that night sky, as hard as she submerged herself in the darkness and as desperately as she scorched herself on the burning stars, it was not enough.

Her eyes open, her body heavy with the chains that imprison her. The room is cloaked in Blue and Grey as a single tear escapes down her cheek. How she longed to be back in the darkness.