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Awaiting the Freedom Boat

Part 2 - The Lottery of No Return

By KomalPublished 11 months ago 2 min read

If you haven't read Part 1, here's the link given below:

By Rowan Finley :

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The boat rocked as the last of the passengers shuffled aboard, the deck creaking under their cautious steps. Casta clutched her daisy, twirling it between her fingers as she glanced around. Something felt… off.

Robert stood beside her, still avoiding eye contact but muttering to himself. “Thirty-two passengers. One captain. Four crew members. Zero lifeboats.

Casta’s caretaker, shifting her weight to her stronger leg, frowned. “Zero lifeboats?”

Robert nodded, his fingers twitching. “None. Not one.”

Before anyone could process that unsettling detail, a voice boomed from the ship’s speaker system, crackly and just a little too enthusiastic.

“WELCOME, SPECIAL PASSENGERS! YOU HAVE WON THE LOTTERY OF A LIFETIME! A NEW HOME AWAITS YOU—A PLACE WHERE YOU WILL BE SAFE, PRODUCTIVE, AND VALUED!”

Casta clapped. “Yay! I love being valued!”

Her caretaker, however, wasn’t celebrating. Neither was Robert.

“That sounded rehearsed,” Robert muttered. “Like an advertisement. Or… propaganda.”

Casta tugged at her caretaker’s sleeve. “Why does everyone keep saying we ‘won’ something? What did we win?”

Her caretaker bent down, smoothing Casta’s hair. “That’s what I’m trying to figure out, sweetheart.”

The cheerful woman in the yellow raincoat reappeared, her grin unwavering. “Now, if you’ll all head downstairs, we have a lovely orientation prepared for you!”

A few passengers hesitated, exchanging uneasy glances. Robert didn’t move. “We shouldn’t GO down there,” he whispered. “I heard a door LOCK earlier. The only way off this ship is the way we came.”

Casta, still clutching her daisy, squinted up at him. “Then let’s just go BACK!”

Her caretaker’s heart sank. The dock was already nothing more than a distant smudge on the horizon. There was no going back.

That’s when the first scream came from below deck.

A sharp, muffled yelp, followed by a heavy thud.

The cheerful woman’s grin didn’t fade, but her fingers twitched. “Now, now,” she said quickly. “Some of our guests just take a little longer to adjust! NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT!

Robert took a slow step backward. “Yeah. No. We should definitely worry.”

Casta frowned. “Maybe they just fell down the stairs?”

The boat groaned as if it, too, was uncertain about that explanation.

Then, from below deck, a voice—a new voice—rang out over the speaker system. This one wasn’t crackly. It wasn’t cheerful. It was low, smooth, and deliberate.

“Attention, passengers. The lottery is OVER. Welcome to your new reality.”

Casta’s grip on her daisy tightened.

Robert whispered, “I knew it.

And the ship kept moving forward, cutting through the endless sea.

Author's Note:

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR STOPPING BY! <3

Stay tuned for part 3 which will be written by Rowan Finley. His profile is listed below:

AdventureMysteryShort Story

About the Creator

Komal

I write poems and stories that hit the feels.

When I’m not lost in my own plots, I’m either daydreaming about the next big idea or just winging life with a grin.

𝕀 𝕙𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕖 ℙ𝕠𝕨𝕖𝕣 𝕥𝕠 𝕞𝕒𝕜𝕖 𝕒𝕟 𝕀𝕄ℙ𝔸ℂ𝕋

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

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Comments (12)

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  • Irene Mugang Narewec 8 months ago

    very interesting 👌

  • Rowan Finley 10 months ago

    To read part three, follow the link below: https://shopping-feedback.today/fiction/awaiting-the-freedom-boat-part-3%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">

  • A.short stories11 months ago

    very good parabens

  • Marie381Uk 11 months ago

    Beautifully written ♦️♦️♦️✍️

  • Tales by J.J.11 months ago

    I love the eerie atmosphere and the sense of mystery that builds throughout. Thank you for sharing such a captivating piece.

  • kikii11 months ago

    Oooh, I'm hooked- can't wait to see how it unfolds!

  • Mother Combs11 months ago

    Great story

  • Rowan Finley 11 months ago

    Yes, great tension building here. I appreciate how Robert is always counting things and then Casta’s innocence is especially endearing and a great juxtaposition to the boat and what’s going on behind the scenes.

  • JBaz11 months ago

    Nice build of tension, left us wondering what is going to happen

  • Ali Sadeek Ahmed11 months ago

    Amazing

  • Marie McGrath11 months ago

    Oooooh ..perfectly riveting. Where next? Love this journey.

  • Gripping and thrilling! Great writing!

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