Yu Minhong: it is more important to cultivate a person who is accepted by society than to be admitted to a hundred Peking University.

The theme of the speech is "Family Education in the context of Great Education".

The main problem for Chinese families is the lack of quality education resources in China and the contradiction between parents' desire for quality education for their children.

There is little solution to this problem.

First, the lack of high-quality educational resources, whether kindergarten, primary school, junior high school, senior high school, or any remote county, there are problems.

Second, although the birth rate has declined rather than risen in recent years, to a certain extent, everyone can go to college if they want, but it still does not ease the anxiety of parents.

Because what parents want is not for their children to go to college, but whether they can enter high-quality education circles such as Peking University and Tsinghua University.

Many parents unwittingly equate going to a good university with the future of their children. At the same time, few parents are willing to admit that their child is an ordinary person.

If parents do not recognize this fact and put an ordinary child in the top competition of 5% and 10%, the child's ability is not enough, and the teacher and parents force him to have psychological problems under unbearable pressure. so now many children are anxious and depressed.

So, in this sense, it is really important for us to put forward an expectation for our children.

This is: the all-round development of morality, intelligence, physique, beauty and labor is the whole content of cultivating a child.

How to train morally, intellectually, physically, and physically?

The most important thing is to cultivate children's four abilities: the first is called personality ability, the second is moral ability, the third is learning ability, and the fourth is group ability.

The cultivation of these four abilities has laid a fertile soil for the lifelong development of children.

Plant a tree in fertile soil, as long as he lives long, he does not have to worry about how to grow, because he will continue to absorb nutrients from the earth.

First, personality ability.

A person first cultivate his positive and optimistic personality, I think he has room for survival.

This positive optimism includes his attitude towards life in the face of setbacks and failures.

Unfortunately, our frustration education is really too poor. very often, we make our children frustrated for life.

For example, when the child's academic performance is poor, it is not to help the child rationally, but to deny it.

If a child gets 40 points, the teacher is very angry and the parents beat the child. There are not many parents who can sit down with their children, seriously discuss this issue, and encourage their children.

What is frustration education? frustration education is to give a child the courage to move on when he fails.

If the child gets a score of 40, the first thing we need to do is to tell him that 40 is good and why he has done 40% right.

What we're going to do next is to analyze why these 60 points are lost. Then put forward the request for progress to the child, such as whether you can get 60 points next time.

In this process, parents should provide selfless help to make their children feel that 60 is not a difficult score, so that they are willing to fight for it. It is possible that he will get 60 or even 75 next time.

Children's progress often needs the encouragement and guidance of their parents.

When a child is faced with difficulties and setbacks, we use the wrong method, which will only bring a greater blow and frustration to the child, thus causing him to give up.

Family is a safe haven for children. No matter what happens to your children, you must first accept their current situation.

And let the child know that even if he encounters all the difficulties in the world and comes home, his parents can still receive him rationally and warmly.

In reality, however, what our parents often do is to push their children to the opposite of themselves.

Constantly comparing with other people's children, constantly blaming, or making unreliable demands will make children feel alienated from their parents, distrust their parents, and lead to great rebellion over time. Even run away from home and die.

Parents, only after giving their children enough rational protection, make demands with their children.

The second is moral ability.

Moral ability is a child's ability to behave in society.

More is cultivated in the family, parents' every move directly established the height of the child.

A calculating, short-sighted, complain about everything, psychological dark parents, want to cultivate open and aboveboard, honest, magnificent children, the possibility is very small.

Because, moral ability, from the example and demonstration of parents.

My father is a carpenter, erecting girders, eighteen miles around, who built a house, he must go to set up girders.

He has a rule that if the family is well-off, he will be paid, and if the family is in difficulty, he will leave after a bowl of wine.

This generosity is directly confirmed by me.

The influence of parents brings about the existence of your basic character and moral character, which is particularly important.

In the final analysis, moral ability is a word that allows your child to be accepted by all the people around him and think that he is a good person.

Therefore, our upbringing of a child's behavior should be set according to the social acceptance of the child's behavior.

When I take care of my two children, there is a prerequisite that the grades can be bad, and the most important thing is to be accepted by the friends around me, which is particularly important.

Third, the ability of continuous learning.

When my children were young, I had a habit of taking two ten-day holidays a year to explore the world.

I will make a plan with my children, and this year we will visit some places, such as Greek culture.

I will conduct a study a month in advance and work out a route to discuss with my child. Everywhere we go, we talk to our children about what's going on in this place.

Why do this let the child have a deeper understanding of the whole world, let him have feelings for the world.

When my daughter was 5 years old, we sat by the sea, waiting for the moon to rise from the sea, slowly rising and getting smaller. I was on one side to recite the "Spring River Flower Moon Night" to my daughter, reciting one sentence after another, and my daughter was fascinated.

This is to cultivate children's deeper understanding of the beauty of nature, which is something that parents have to do, and no one else can do it.

Make them curious about the world, so now I see two children holding history books to read me, because this is where I raised them.

When I went to Israel, I found that in front of any family pushing the door in, there was a stove wall, which was a book wall, as was the case in every household. This is an important reason why each Israeli person reads an average of 65 books a year.

I often say that if you fall in love with reading all your life, you can live a relatively confident and good life even if you don't go to college.

Every time I go out to play, there must be two or three books in the box. When the children see my packed books, they will bring two.

On the plane, on the train, in the hotel, by the swimming pool, I would take out the book and read it. When the two children saw me reading, they would also take the book out to read.

Children must be made to love reading.

In addition, to let the child learn to do it, parents should also accompany him from an early age.

Learning is not just an examination, but an in-depth study, and the impact of this process on children is very important.

The fourth is group ability.

Man is an animal living in society, and for us, the ability to c