The Garden

The thing stared at me, never breaking its focus. Its eyes bloodshot, causing them to stand out against its pale, white skin. The dark, brown mass perched on top its head was all entangled within itself, forming a giant knot. It was repulsive to look at, though at the same time, I couldn’t pull myself to look away from the beast. Somewhere, hidden behind the bloodshot eyes I could vaguely see the pain and hurt that the creature was feeling. As if it was searching for somebody to just notice it and help it. Then, snap, I recognized the beast.

In fact, it wasn’t a beast or a creature of any sort that I had been staring at. It was my own reflection, in my mirror.

“Wow, you really let yourself go the past couple weeks, haven’t ya.” I said to myself as I began to pull at my skin, as if to automatically fix myself. Stepping back and realizing that I was still unsatisfied with my appearance, I then began to undress and jumped into the shower.

It had been a rough couple of weeks with my great grandmother passing, causing a fracas to occur throughout the entire family. Nobody was satisfied with how others were coping with the heartbreaking news; some moving on with their lives, while others completely broke down and cried about every little thing. Then there were those few that were still in shock, waiting for somebody to tell us that none of it was real and that our great grandmother was indeed still alive and well.

I was one of the few. Looking as if I was coping just fine on the outside, helping those who weren’t managing well, while in fact I was breaking away on the inside piece by piece.

Now, here I was looking like some ungodly creature, weeks after her passing and about to have a breakdown in my shower. The scalding, hot water trickling down my face as I just stood there, refusing to move even the tiniest muscle. I could feel the tears swelling up in my eyes, trying to break through the barrier my eyelids were creating and fall down my cheeks, escaping to the tub drain.

Then before I could begin to just let go and cry, I began to hear something. Almost like a faint yelling coming from downstairs. Immediately turning the water off and springing out of the shower, I wrapped my towel around myself and cracked the bathroom door open to hear the commotion.

“I’m selling the house! It’s a dump anyway!”

Great. My grandmother had decided to stop by for a visit by the sounds of it.

“Mom, just calm down! We haven’t even had her funeral yet! This all can wait!” I heard my mother scream back.

I quickly proceeded to get dressed and headed downstairs to see what I could do to stop the yelling.

“I need money, not another house!” my grandmother yelled while she began ripping family photos off the wall and throwing them into a cardboard box, barely even looking back to see if she was damaging any of them in the process.

“You weren’t even there when she died! I’m the only one in this family who took care of her.” my mother responded, following behind my grandmother and rehang the pictures in their previous locations.

I just stood there, baffled by what I was witnessing; neither of them even noticing I was there. I wasn’t in the mood to deal with their chaos, so I headed back upstairs to try and get away from the noise.

I found myself standing in the middle of my great grandmother’s office, just taking in everything before it was destroyed by the tornado that was currently downstairs. My great grandmothers pink desk sitting in the corner, covered in paperwork and magazines that she must’ve been rummaging through when she last sat there.

I sat down, picking up the magazine closest to me and began thumbing through it, bringing a smile to my face whenever I noticed her fragile handwriting next to the things she wanted on the pages. Then there it was on the back cover of BETTER HOMES AND GARDEN, in a small, crooked font.

Marilyn Talbot

136 E. Fountain Dr.

Emmett, Idaho 83617

Her name was there, staring at me. It was always such a respectable name for such a respectable woman, and it began to make me miss her even more just thinking about it.

I put down the magazine, and began to cry hysterically, my tears soaking all the loose paper that laid on the desk.

I could still hear, my mother and grandmother downstairs yelling at each other, so I knew I was safe from anyone walking in on me. I sat there for at least an hour just like that, my head down on the desk, just sobbing from all the built up pain over the past couple of weeks that I had pushed away.

When I finally stopped crying, I looked up to see a little black book peeking out of one of the cubby holes on the desk. I had never remembered seeing this notebook before, so it confused me to see it sitting there. Without hesitation I grabbed it from its hiding spot and began to look through it. It was pretty boring, just a simple address book that my great grandmother had kept filled with old addresses from when she had kept in touch with her college sorority sisters. As I sat there skimming the pages of the old addresses, there was one that stood out to me. There, under the “C’s” was my name in bold, cursive lettering, but in place of my address there was a small message instead. It read:

Look in the GARDEN. Glass vial.

I was confused as to what my great grandmother had been trying to tell me. She had many gardens around her property and many glass vials in various spots. I was trying to figure out what she had meant by this when I could hear somebody coming up the stairs.

“Emma? Are you up here?” I heard my mother ask as the footsteps began to near the office doorway.

“Uh, yeah Mom! I’m in the office!” I shouted back.

I quickly put the address book back where I had found it, covering it with random papers, so nobody else would see it, then backing away from the desk so my mother wouldn’t grow suspicious.

“Your grandma just left. Of course, only after she tore our house apart.” she said, growing frustrated as she talked about it.

“Yeah, I could hear you guys fighting so I just came up here to get away.” I replied.

“Good choice.” she plopped herself in the desk chair I had just stood up from and began picking at her nails. “Find anything interesting up here?” she asked, still picking at her nails.

“Nah. Just some old magazines and paperwork, nothing exciting.” I said grabbing an old nail file off of the nearby vanity and handing it to my mother, hoping to stop her bad habit.

“Hey Mom, do you know which garden was Gram’s favorite? I wanna repot some flowers out of there, so we can take them when we move.” I asked, hoping she wouldn’t become too curious.

My mom looked up from her nails, her eyes directly meeting mine. I could see my reflection in the light blue centers I had always been jealous of as a child.

“Yeah, the front garden, next to the driveway. It was the one garden she could see clearly from her window.” she answered.

“Thanks Mom, and don’t let Grammie get to you. We know she’s always been a little difficult.” I said, leaning down to hug her.

She wrapped her arms around me and squeezed tightly. I could feel her nails digging into my back as we sat there, both of us trying not to let the other see our pain. When we let go, I left the office and headed outside to check the garden.

I didn’t see anything at first, just lots of flowers and dirt. I was about to give up when out of the corner of my eye, I saw something sparkle in the corner of the garden. I pulled the flowers out of my way to reveal a hole in the side of the brick lining, with none other than a small glass vial laying inside. I pulled out the vial, and to my surprise there was another note inside.

Emma Dear,

Your mother, you and your sister are the only ones who truly cared for me. The ones who uprooted their entire lives to come live with me and I would be lying if I didn’t tell you that those were the best years of my life. I couldn’t leave you anything in my will, because unfortunately the rest of the family is greedy and all they cared about was my money. So I am writing this to you because I know you will do the right thing. Check by the well and under the loose brick where you and your sister used to dig up the bugs there is now an envelope. Inside I have written you a check of $20,000. Please take care of your sister and mother for me. I miss you all so dearly. I love you my Emma Dear.

GRAM

I couldn’t believe what I had just read. I gripped the note in my hand, making sure not to lose it and ran over to the well that was across the driveway. At first, I was nervous to lift the brick, to see if what my great grandmother had written was true. There it was clear as day. An envelope with a check for $20,000.

I ran back inside, skipping every other stair on my way back up to the office, where I had hoped my mother was still sitting.

“Mom!” I screamed, too excited to keep my cool.

“What? What’s wrong?” she asked, starting to look a little worried.

“Nothing mom. Absolutely nothing is wrong.” I said.

I handed her the envelope and the letter, smiling the largest smile that had ever been placed amongst my face, knowing that even then my great grandmother was still watching over us.