grief
Losing a family member is one of the most traumatic life events; Families must support one another to endure the five stages of grief and get through it together.
The Silver Lining of Surviving
There is a centuries-old Japanese tradition that involves the art and philosophy of repairing broken pottery. It is called Kintsukuroi, which means “golden repair,” or sometimes Kintsugi, meaning “golden joinery.” When a precious bowl is broken, it is not discarded as something that has lost its beauty or become unworthy. It is carefully, delicately and lovingly pieced back together using a golden lacquer to rejoin the broken pieces. The philosophy behind this practice is based on the belief that the bowl has been transformed into something more beautiful and more resilient than it was before. That its story, told in gold, makes it invaluable in an exquisitely flawed way.
By Greta Rosenberger5 years ago in Families
Threads Through Memories Lost and Memories Made
I sat alone in the hospital next to my mother. It was her seventy-first birthday and she just lay there, breathing heavily with her eyes closed- the same way she had for many days prior. I knew this would be her last birthday, and we sang quietly to her even though she did not show us she heard. I knew she did.
By Lauren Maringola5 years ago in Families
Seeing the damage Be undone
Cps is negatively affecting families nation wide , as they seek to detain children sometimes for reasons that should not be deemed credible. There is no reason for workers to exercise such extreme measures upon families who genuinely love their children. They have no accountability to any agency or higher level of government and some of the workers are not even qualified to make such important decisions, sometimes lacking both education and experience. I think it should be a requirement for workers to pass some form of training program before being thrown into the field.Family preservation is said to be their main focuses in dependency cases however with no specific persons or agencies overseeing them, this sometimes is not the case. During the course of the investigation and even during family reunification workers put together reports for the judge that also state their recommendation, the context of these reports have a great influence in the judges decision in the families case. Not often enough is anything on their report verified by a third party. As a result the workers claims in their reports are assumed to be true and used to hold parents and guardians accountable for allegations, sometimes even despite their being no physical evidence what so ever. This is being allowed because the department of children and family services have their dependency hearings in their own court house rather than the superior court in the county’s in which they operate. When parents feel they are being treated unfairly or wish to refute any of the allegations they are being accused of, their is no third party in which the parents can seek assistance or in which they can file a complaint against the department without feeling that they may then be victimized in a attempt to retaliate. The cost in most situations is not an item of material value but rather their flesh and blood, their children. In the United States parental rights are considered to be a fundamental right, one that is protected by the constitution of this great country. Cps being as independent as they are, with no accountability for their actions from an overseer, sometimes both intentionally and unintentionally abuse this power. The trauma that this causes not only the family involved but society as a whole is enormous beyond a doubt as it leave entire families distraught and children are faced with life long emotional and mental disorders that sometime never go away. As a result, many people affected are burden with trauma related depression, attachment, trust , and anxiety disorders that affect their ability to be a well functioning member of society as a whole. “Breaking up the family’s unit is a threat to not only the family involved , but a menace to the very foundations of society itself” I propose that there be an agency created , in whom members are voted in by the people, to oversee the department of children and family’s services. Member of this third party agency are to give monthly public addresses to the people that follow up with any positive progress from the department and share ways in which the department helped families stay together. This agency will also have an agenda pertaining to follow up Curtsies via telephone, email, or in person visits to any and every client of the department and a survey should be completed during these follow ups. During this engagement the clients( parents) will Be asked general questions such as , the overall satisfaction rate from their experience with the social workers with the department, if the department is doing anything to help meet family’s goals , if their are any complaints about the departments actions or non actions, and any feedback on their behavior and engagement with the family unit. The agency’s should also review monthly reports prepared by the workers about each and every case they’ve are involved in and these reports should be verified by the third party to assure the accuracy of workers claims. There should also be an investigation following up on every complaint against the department and disciplinary action for any employee giving false testimony against a client. there should also be repercussions and consequences for the department as a whole with ever proven true investigation. The department and it’s social workers should be held accountable for any violation of the fundamental constitutional rights of a parent or guardian over their child. Forced Adoption , actually adoption in general, has Been proven to have more negative affects on both child and family ( both biological and adoptive) that it should be the last resort yet a lot of the times it is instead put first over family’s preservation. A broken home is then grown into a broken society. We must do all we can do to assure that the departments of children and family service are practicing within their own said claims of operation, and they are focused on preserving the family first and foremost and only leaning toward adoption when it is absolutely necessary.
By Jennifer church5 years ago in Families
Gone
I stand in an empty room, quiet and silent. No sound, no tone to the music that was once your voice. This room was always so fully furnished, filled with tables of love, chairs of hope, cups of inspiration, plates of understanding, Platters of deep connections, spoonful's of talks, those conversations that would last hours, but played with time like a swing full of minutes. How could this have happened? Why did you seem to change so quickly? ...
By Yolanda Olivia Anderson5 years ago in Families
the Young Old Lady
I was 12 years old when my grandmother bought a knitting kit for me and told me she was going to teach me how to knit. I was an epic failure. She was left handed and I was right handed and she did it completely differently than I had to in order to make it work. I was supposed to be knitting a very simple purse with a beautiful crystal button in the middle and I botched the job over and over again. She would rip it out and would adjust it for me so I felt like I had accomplished something. For months I battled with the needles and yarn, not understanding the mechanics at all and, frankly, I thought it was odd that I wasn't yet in my teens being taught what is well known to be an older lady activity. I felt I didn't have a knack for it and the project was abandoned for months on end.
By Emily Hinkle-DeGraff5 years ago in Families
PATRICIA
My mother, she was a strong woman. I didn’t think so when I was young. When I was young, my house was filled with the roaring presence of men. They inspired in me a stubborn sense of pride that made me eager and hungry to prove that I was as strong as they were. It wasn’t hard, when I was young. Boys and girls were similar in strength. Thus a girl could fight a boy and win, when we were young. I was a tomboy, when I was young. For three girls to be raised with six brothers, what else could one expect?
By Shequinah Nanshanapa5 years ago in Families
Specks
Mom burnt everything. Cookbooks lined our kitchen crevices, but mom burnt everything. We’d be out, and she’d get that look in her eyes. The oh crap, I left food in there again look. And then she’d admit it. Although, we already knew what she was going to say once she gave us that look.
By Madeline Morkin5 years ago in Families
Grieving 101: When the tears won't stop
In a few days it will be 3 months since my husband passed away and today was a rough day. I have cried practically the entire day for various reasons.My 90 year old neighbor across the street passed away yesterday and my last memory of her is what triggered my tears. Two weeks ago an ambulance took her to the hospital on a rainy Sunday and I knew she would not return home. Instead of placing her on a stretcher as they had at other times, the paramedics brought her out of her home in a blanket.
By Cheryl E Preston5 years ago in Families
Dancing with Cancer
My mom lived with cancer for almost 10 years, and it wasn’t until after she passed away late January of this year that I learned she actually preferred to call it “dancing with cancer.” My dad and I were working on a post for social media to announce her passing, and as we were writing it, he corrected me, saying, “no, she didn’t just live with cancer, she danced.”
By Kayla Warren5 years ago in Families
