Shoe Box Money

The bell rang, calling for a dismissal of classes for the day.

Mark gathered up his books and headed to the school’s computer room to check for updates on his college applications and to submit his final assessment for High School. The computer room, at this hour, was often empty as most students had access to a computer at home. This wasn’t the case for Mark, he had never even owned a cell phone which didn’t do much for his social experience being a child of the digital age. His online presence and much of his social life was limited to the hours spent at school and as much as his friends tried to keep him updated and involved, he still felt left behind.

Mark’s entire life was shared with his single, undocumented mother in a tiny one bedroom flat in a building that seemed to be falling apart. He was very much aware of how hard his mother worked to provide for them both. As difficult as it was most times, Mark tried his best to understand and make the best of the life he was living. He was not completely withheld from the world; their TV, although not flat screened or plasma, if tuned just right managed to catch the news and a few movies on the local channels. This, like many other things, was out of Mark’s control and pushed him to focus more on the things he could control, like his academic performance and the image he portrayed. After all, there really wasn’t much to do but visit the park and indulge in the books he borrowed from the local library since he seemed to always feel out of place among his friends with never being able to pitch in for food or snacks or afford a movie ticket. He was also not very proud of the building he lived in and so encouraged no visits.

With most of his time spent studying, it really was no surprise that he would get accepted into the college of his choice. He knew he couldn’t afford an Ivy League and he wasn’t athletic enough so he banked everything on good grades to gain a scholarship. As he stared in awe at the acceptance letter displayed on the screen before him, elation spread through his body and his fists clenched as he threw them into the air and let out a whispered

“Yes!”

“Congratulations!”

said a voice behind him.

He spun around to see Penny Leone standing there smiling widely while snapping her fingers as a silent form of applause.

“Thanks!”

said Mark shyly with a smile.

"Didn’t think anyone else was in here”

he finished.

“Don't you know?"

Said Penny narrowing her eyes and leaning closer to his face.

We are never alone.”

she whispered while looking around nervously before bursting into giggles.

She headed to the computer beside Mark as his heart continued racing in his chest. He had only had a crush on Penny since forever. He knew her since elementary and still remembers her walking up to him during recess and handing him an invite to her party. That was the first time they had spoken and in that moment he wished that it would not be the last.

“Sooo, what about you? Have you decided where you’ll go?”

he spoke to fill the silence.

“That depends.”

said Penny turning to give him her full attention

“Will you continue to ignore me if I decide to go to Western with you?”

“Ahhh..”

drawled Mark confused.

"How do you know I'm going to Western?"

Penny giggled and pointed to his computer screen with the acceptance letter still displayed.

“I mean you’ve only missed every party and every social event I’ve ever invited you to. I get it.”

she sighed jokingly.

“But yes, I have chosen and to Western I go. They have an outstanding art program and I actually visited the campus and it’s not too bad and not too far from home if I get homesick.”

She finished shyly, blushing bright red as she turned back to the computer in front of her.

He could not believe his ears. Penny. The girl he’s been dreaming about for years will be going to the same college as he was. Were the stars finally aligning for him? He knew he had a dumb smile on his face so he quickly turned back to his screen as well.

“So what brings you here today?”

asked Mark

“Oh, just need to print a few forms for admission. My printer at home is broken.”

replied Penny, focused on the task at hand.

“Oh.”

said Mark as he tried to focus on the letter in front of him

“Well,”

he paused.

“Well what?”

asked Penny, turning to him.

Mark was staring at the screen with a look of shock and confusion.

“Mark?”

said Penny

“Helloooo”

she said while waving her hands beside his face.

“Ah yea. Well, I have to go”

said Mark as he abruptly stood up and started shoving his books into his backpack.

“See ya tomorrow Penny.”

he said as he forced a smile.

“Bye.”

whispered Penny as she watched him leave.

“Of course!”

he shouted as he stormed down the empty hallway a safe distance from the computer room.

Mark stalked down the sidewalk all the while screaming angry thoughts out loud in his head. He crossed the street without even waiting for the pedestrian light to go green. Cars honked and drivers yelled and shook their fists in his direction.

“Why me?”

he muttered as he continued the angry march down the alleyway to his building. He didn’t realize his speed until he saw his building in front of him. He launched himself over the fence and landed sharply on his feet as he continued through the doors and up the stairs. As he shut the door behind him, he pulled his backpack from his shoulders and tossed it angrily into the opposing wall.

“I have never.”

his voice quivered

“Asked for anything!”

he yelled.

“I’ve been a good son, a good student…”

his voice gave way to sobs.

“I just want a shot at a better life. I never asked for this and the one thing I do want I can’t have.”

he buried his head into his palms as he backed into the door and slid to the floor.

“Marcus?”

said a sleepy voice from the bedroom.

Mark jumped up at the sound of his mother's voice.

“Yea?”

he replied

“It’s me mom. Wh-What are you doing home so early?”

he called as he wiped his face with the sleeves of his t-shirt.

His mother came walking out the room.

“Oh, the boss thought I needed a break,”

she said stretching as her smile began to fade.

“Marcus, what’s wrong?”

She rushed to him.

“Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine mom. I just. I just need to shower.”

he said as he pushed past her.

“Marcus Elliot Thames, I carried you for 9 months, I know...”

“Every cut and scrape”

he finished

“Exactly. I know my son and you don’t need to shower right now. The hot water is out again.”

she said with a smirk

“So why don’t you sit on that couch and tell me what is wrong.”

she demanded sternly.

Marcus began

“Mom it’s..”

“Nothing”

she finished

“I heard that, now tell me something else”

Mark walked over to the couch and dropped down onto it, silently staring at the blank TV screen willing himself to not give in.

“If you don’t tell me, I am walking down to that school and asking every one of your little friends…”

“Goodluck”

replied Mark blankly.

His mother let out a sigh as she walked over to the couch.

“I know I don’t always have the answers and I know our life frustrates you but please don’t shut me out huh?”

she said brushing his hair with her fingers as he leaned his head on to her shoulder.

“I got into Western College”

he muttered.

“You what?”

said his mom high pitched

“I got into Western mom but I can’t go. We can’t afford it.”

he replied, before turning in the opposite direction to bury his face into the pillow he slept on each night.

“Marcus”

said his mother with a quivering voice

“I am so proud of you”

a tear escaping her eye as she leaned in to hug him.

“Look at me Marcus. Come on sit up. Talk to me.”

she probed

“Why can’t you go?”

“Mom just drop it”

his stifled voice replied from the pillow.

“Marcus, I don’t understand. It’s a scholarship no?”

she pressed

Mark sat up, eyes aimed at the floor

“It’s a partial scholarship mom. I need to find $20,000 to cover the remaining expenses. I have $2000 saved from my part time job at the water park . Why do we get this life mom?”

asked Mark sadly as tears streamed down his face.

“What’s the point of it all?”

“Marcus, don’t you ever let me hear you speak that way,”

she said while gripping his face.

“Wait here!”

she commanded as she got up and headed into the bedroom.

Marcus used the bottom of his shirt this time to pat his face dry as he looked up to see his mom standing in the bedroom doorway cradling a shoe box. She cast her eyes to the floor as she began speaking.

“I know this life..”

she stifled a sob

“our life isn't ideal. I know I have never been able to give you the things you deserve and you are deserving of the world son. When you were born, I had the option of giving you up.”

She started to slowly make her way over to Mark as she continued

“Everyone told me it meant you would have a better life. A life I would never be able to give you. I remember hearing you cry and asking them to give you to me and as soon as I held you, you just stopped and I knew”

She smiled

“I knew I was never letting you go but I knew I was robbing you of a chance at a better life too. So in that moment I made a promise to you, to always provide that sense of comfort when the world makes no sense to you and if ever the time came when you lost all hope that I would be there to give it right back.”

Now sitting beside him again, she slowly placed the shoe box on Mark’s lap as he stared at her in bewilderment.

Mark turned his attention to the box with a tear stained face. Brushing his face with the back of his hand, he then reached for the lid of the box. The box was stuffed with various denominations of cash.

“Mom.”

he said as he glanced back at her

“I’ve been saving ever since that day Marcus, hoping, praying that the day you needed it. It would be enough.”

she said, trying to force a smile.

“Mom, you were always enough”

said Marcus as he threw himself into her arms.

When they each felt enough comfort to let go, they sat together and started going through each bill, taking account of how much was saved in the box.

“60, 80, 100”

said Mark’s mom as Mark plugged it into his calculator.

“So where do we stand?”

she asked nervously

“Mom.”

said Mark gravely as he closed the little black notebook he was using to account the money.

“Oh no don’t tell me”

she said covering her eyes.

Mark reached over and took her hands down and said

“Mom, I love you”

he paused

“and I’m going to college!”

he yelled, as he jumped from his chair to hug her.

“How much was it?”

she asked

“Exactly $20,000”

replied Mark.