Guide for Parents to Prepare for Child Custody Evaluation: Do's and Don't

After the divorce, the decree proposes plans for child custody, child support and visitation. When a couple cannot resolve the disputes, the court holds a trial, and the judge passes the judgment. Before trial, the Child Custody Law in Hawaii allows the judge to order a child custody evaluation to gather information about the child's family. This aids the judge in deciding the best interests of the child.

A custody evaluation is an objective assessment of the needs of a child and each parent's ability to provide those needs. It concerns the strengths and weaknesses of both parents. It attends to past events, present scenarios and future needs of the family and helps provide a positive adjustment after divorce. The court assigns a child custody evaluator who is a trained mental health professional. The evaluation includes observations, interviews of parents and children, home visits, information gathering, written tests, and psychological evaluation. At the end of the process, the evaluator presents a primary report to the court, followed by court hearings. Parents should cooperate with the evaluator and the court in the custody process.

How to Prepare for Child Custody Evaluation Process

Parents should put their best foot forward while participating in the child custody evaluation. Here are some tips to win contested child custody.

Do's

• Parents should treat the custodial evaluator with respect. The evaluator is an experienced and dignified professional and deserves your respect.
• Both parents should acknowledge each other’s strengths and weaknesses. They should talk about their plans for their children and parenting beliefs instead of highlighting the weaknesses of the other parent.
• They must be honest with the evaluator during the evaluation process. They should be honest in their interviews and provide transparent records and information to the evaluator.
• Parents should acknowledge the benefits of a positive child relationship with each parent. They should respect each other and express their willingness for different custody. They should know the difference between custody and visitation and respect the law and the system. They should be flexible and open to suggestions.
• The focus should always be on the child's well-being, and parents should display it in their attitude.
• They should arrive at appointments on time and dress appropriately, in clean and professional attire. Homes should be well-kept during home visits.
• Parents can organize their records and papers beforehand and should promptly provide them to the evaluator whenever asked. They can make notes of the questions they want to ask the custodial evaluator. The parent should provide as much evidence and data as possible to support their standpoint for better assessment. They can connect their evaluator with relevant persons like babysitters, school teachers etc., to support their report.

Don'ts

• Parents must not be disrespectful to the evaluator. They should not let the evaluator have a bad primary opinion about themselves.
• Parents should not speak negatively about each other. If the custodial evaluator asks about the strengths and weaknesses of the parent, try to give a balanced and even answer. The evaluation process is meant to provide child support in Hawaii and not therapy or psychological assistance to parents, and thus they should not ask the evaluator for therapy or personal advice. Do not mix marital issues with parenting during evaluation.
• Parents must not pre-train their kids on how to behave or what to say during evaluation sessions and let them be natural. The parents should also not pretend to be perfect and be natural and themselves during the evaluation.
• They must not miss any appointments.
• Do not try to be defensive if the evaluator asks unsettling questions to test you, and handle the situation with calmness.
• They should not disobey the court's orders while the evaluation is in progress.
• Parents must not try to manipulate the evaluator in any manner. The priority should always be the children, and thus the experienced professional should be allowed to make wise decisions without thinking about their own personal interests.

Keywords

It is important for parents to sit for child custody evaluation with the right space of mind when they have already just gone through a divorce and related anxieties. Parents just need to be respectful of the process and their children's best interests. A better future awaits us all.