Embedded quotient of a Boss

Hard to imagine at this age, in my mothers shoes; I would have six children and married for over a decade. Truthfully I struggle with establishing my own foundation so the comparison is far fetched. I know marriage is a partnership overall, however the distribution of responsibilities shared between a man a woman usually are by far two extremes. Women definitely came a long way and many feminist claim there’s still a journey to conquer among our opposite species. I’m all for women empowerment and independence, I just know that there are things that a man can do that I can’t and many times just refuse. The placement on these responsibilities I believe are discovered during the agreement of the union between two parties. This in no way makes the value of the responsibilities superior to any specifics by sex. I believe the value of responsibility is equal and total individual preferences accordingly. Brief Background on my parents who are now both senior citizens (early sixties). Her four year senior, my father met my mom when she was eighteen. At this age my mother became pregnant and refusing to have a child out of wedlock my parents wed. The pregnancy prevented my mother from completing high school and from that time for the next decade they would produce six children; two boys and four girls. On the fifth pregnancy my mom would have twins which she believed could never happen. As a twin also my mother was informed by doctors that she wouldn’t be able to twins herself. One can only imagine the shock of the news of twins when you already have a full household to feed and add two more mouths. Being one of the twins which made us the youngest of her children, we were often told by siblings that we had it easy and that we were spoiled. I just like to think by her fifth pregnancy she had enough practice to know what would make her job easier. I can’t speak on the mother that my siblings experienced. I can only share my personal experience shared with my mom individually. Even the experiences and relationship between my twin and I as individuals with our mother are truthfully on two different spectrum. I remember my twin stating that my mom showed me favoritism. I do not agree and frankly know it was the exact opposite. I can remembering asking my mother why did she show my twin favoritism and she said because she did not feel I needed the attention. There is no resentment because of this, I do believe my twin was more of an attention seeker early on. My twin also knew what tools she could utilize for this attention at all times. I’ve always described myself and laid back and down to earth, and many friends would often express how my twin and I were night and day. Meaning there’s no way my mother would be able to treat night and day equally. This makes total sense to me and I can’t object to anything. My mother is so loving and selfless I often tell her she is the exact definition of faith. She is the most faithful person I know and definitely a positive motivating force in my life.

As I realized the seriousness of the pandemic, I recognize that my mind acknowledges the pandemic with a sense of panic. However I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t panicking and how my peace of mind through all that was going on maintained. The progress of analyzing this only left one person, My mother Sandra Lightner. My earliest memories were when we would go to church as a family and attend bible study during the week. My parents were young and didn’t have their parents around to be the ideal role model. I know they were just learning as they went along and attending church provided a sense of structure and organization. This also allowed my parents to use the Bible as a blueprint for thir authority over six children. I consider this the foundation of the quotient of a boss a very beautiful woman inside and out;my mother. As early as three I can remember my mother making us learn the ABC’s of the Bible. Not only did we have to memorize them she made it her personal duty that we believed them wholeheartedly. The ABC’s of the Bible I would describe as popular quotes from the Bible that many would find encouraging and motivating when applied to everyday life. I consider my self a shy person however not because of low self esteem. My mother knew we didn’t have a lot and proclaims that children are a blessing. She is the most optimistic person I know. If she wants something no one can tell her she can not get it. Without knowing how or even having the means she just know that she will obtain it eventually. Along with the ABC’s of the Bible everyday before school she would do cheers that also became core beliefs in my life. She would yell out negative things that could be said to a kid in elementary and we would have to reply “No! I am a beautiful blessed child of god!” So she would yell out “you’re ugly” or “you’re stupid” and in unison we would respond with the phrase she told us to say. You don’t realize it as a child and I don’t think I ever literally had to use that phrase. However the power of that exercise embedded so much positivity at a young age this is the basis on which the core of my foundation is built upon. As an adult I often get discouraged then I’ll remember the ABC’s of the Bible or hear my moms exercises even her words of love and encouragement from my child hood to early adolescence. This embedded quotients and admirable traits of a beautiful mother and selfless boss has made my perception on life a beautiful and enjoyable existence. Even through hard times and mentally challenging times such as Covid. Without knowing fully why I feel content I give my mom all the credit. She taught me that I can accomplish and receive anything if I apply myself. She embedded such a confidence of humility that this allows room to be a genuine human being. There are some many admirable qualities of my mom that I’m often reminded of who I am because of her. She made me aspire to become selfless more and more everyday. I’m embedded with a sense of faith that on days or experiences when many would give up; though I can’t see the way or means I’m overwhelmed with a sense that every thing will work out and I do not have to allow or accept negativity in my life. My mom is so unique that when she enters a room she greets every one as beautiful. Doesn’t matter race or sex you’re beautiful people to my mother and for me that’s so profound because the reaction let’s me know that she has touched someone with a greeting not knowing how their day went or if they even consider their self beautiful. My mom told me the other day that my twin stated that she did not want my mom to address her as beautiful. I was shocked and couldn’t grasp the negativity in beauty to no longer want some one to address you as beautiful. I asked my mom what did she tell her? She replied “Wow ok, I’ve been calling you that your whole life.. I guess I won’t call you beautiful” She then said to me I don’t understand when I’ve been calling you beautiful your entire life. I said “I know so if you stop calling me beautiful we’re gonna have a problem!” We laughed.