Back to Normal

We were sitting back at the porch again once the big celebration of my wedding is done. We were having normal lives except for me this time. Everyone gets a turn, Everyone has their own time of celebration, gathering, spending time with new people, having dinners, parties. It was mine. I went to husbands place, i got my new family meet and greet, I was very happy. New life, new lifestyle, new people and most of all with my husband. All that matters was how well we would be and what happens next!!

Once we settled in, again life is back to the same schedule, wake up, get ready, cook breakfast, pack your lunch, leave to office. But the slight change about coming back from office was that- My husband would be waiting. I came with that feeling until he left to Australia. Then i moved back to my Mom's place. Waiting for visa to be approved, hoping to travel soon, to have a beautiful newly wed life with him. But life is always with surprises. I did get visa, but the timing of it was a little odd. Corona the biggest pandemic in years hit and i got struck and i had no choice but to stay back in India. This costed our relationship struggle, goals, time, emotions for about 1.8 years.

Yet again, coming back to new normal. You always have to get back to that phase as if nothing happened. As if no change has happened. I waited. I thought i would pull it off. I thought I could be normal with the new normal that life has put me in. I badly wanted to express how i would feel by not being able to travel, not being able to meet my husband. Luckily , god's grace and husbands choice- he asked me not to put down my papers. Somewhere that helped me with my normal. I had my job to hold on to. I had my finances managed to pay it for my family. Life had it plan to hold on to for a while where in i could actually contribute to my family.didnt know then , but now i can corelate. After a while, had an interest of buying a house. invested my interest, time, his time , his money and honestly with a lot and lot of difficulty fought for a nice 3BHK flat. Probably the best decision someone who really wants to buy a house , had an intention of buying it is at it. I once had a convesation with my man , and he had expressed it about . Didnt know it would strike back at me after about 12 months from then. Life is always planning on us. We do not know then, but we will be at that place when time for sure. My place getting back to the state where i really wished to want something, and me getting there might take a lot of time, lot of patience, would get my hardest state but I am sure, i would get it.

Then again! what next, when is the borders opening. Meanwhile had to put a pin on this , continuing with my normal life, work and had time with family, had a great birthday celebrations with friends, had meals together, vsisited native, stayed with my gandmother, beautiful weddings, friends visit, dine-in's , office parties, endless calls with Husband, fights, crying, cribbing, waiting, expressing the pain of not meeting, feeling hopelessness etc. Yet again the next day seems normal, next day seems hopeful in earning, doing good, enjoying the next day. Even after every puzzle , every piece fits , yet the whole picture isnt complete.

To me, life has put in every possible situation, where i just have to give my best. I do not have choice. I need to do my thing and expect god to give back the results. I had my first job , my mom was working tooo. Things then went fine. I had then not understood why? what? later after 2 years there, i got to know, she had to quit, and by the time it is adjusted with me getting one. So basically, life had plans for us so that we do not suffer, we do not get struck. I was very happy and always kind and wanting to do more for my people and I am glad god choosed me to! Life has its plan to put back every piece of me at the right time right place.

Finally , the time had come to fly. I was now scared, worried. What if leaving job and travelling, what if i would not get a job, what if i do not work anymore. what if i cant support my family anymore, what if They would not be able to maintain. I was crazily worried about all this thoughts. I tried hard to apply from India on Australia jobs on all of the possible sites. But no luck ! I had no choice to quit working and travelling as i badly was missing my man. wanted to spend the time with him. The whole time we not being together was a void , even though i had many people with me around, the piece that connects you is missing. I came , had to be in a quarantine. Then my man always at rescue, got me australia number. I applied for jobs. Lucky me! i got one. Then i realised, Life had plans for me here already. What would happen if i wouldnt get? or i was wondering how did I get sooo early. how come this is possible? or why is it ? Since everyone already here from 2 years were struggling, I do not know how did i? why ? but I was extremely happy. I moved to my Husband's place. I was free, happy, relieved, excited, to see him. First time i was at a place where i had to be. The puzzle was complete.

Then came a time where, my sister got her marriage fixed. Then was the time i realised, this is why God helped me get a job. This is why I got my job during quarantine, and this is my reason to earn. We often fall back, we offen breakdown when we get to know the real cause for the reasons or for the struggle god put us in. I had Always wondered? why me. Always thought whats with me and the struggle, why I would be always put in a state. I would be super upset. But later with the outcomes that life has for me, from me. Me helping people, me getting to know what my potential is, me having that blissful , blessed nature makes it all a very potential character and stronger version of me. So many like this has been my stories. Life has and always is not fair to anyone, but it has its own plans of binding us , filling us with all the strength and getting together the best version of us. Have faith. have that confidence inside you, which always says nothing can go wrong. There is always a plan. To me, life has always made me stronger, always work hard on what you want. I would have it in my plate but to reach i would have to eat something which i do not like. I wonder if this is the plan , or wonder what next? but i would love to sit back, wait, have that strength and over come what comes next. Be it the new normal, or the extreme situation which turns to be the new normal.

Life is a parade, you have to keep moving. you have roles to play in between, entertain, play, sing, cry, show your emotions, put yourself in the extreme place , pull yourself together, Grow, learn, back to the same place with the stronger version of you. Have that person or people who love you close by. Thats the greatest strength. Today, when you look back, life would give you a 1000 reasons to smile. Thats all you need in life.

A small peotry i wrote about me !!

Who am I ?

Few think i am very strong, as they see me winning my fights,They don’t see me cry, struggle all along even when my heart ignites!

Few assume I am always lucky , getting things looking at my progress,They don’t see my hard work, burned to reach that state without regrets !

Few believe I am bold , as I enter beyond my limits to achieve things,They don’t see how multitasking I am and it is way beyond exhausting!

Few express I am going good , need an improvement in the approach,They don’t know how many attempts have I failed without having a coach!

Few perceive I am crazy about the way I think exclusively for anyone,But no one appreciates the efforts I put in covering all aspects for each one!

Few conclude I am quick like lightning, I create noise like the thunder,But they don’t know how I learn, improve and expecting to create wonder!

I know I am true to the core in what or to whom I do, will be assessed, I leave all the outcomes to the supreme and shall simply rest!

This is me, my way and this is who I have become over the years,Love me or hate me , accept me or reject me, I am happy , here!

I always have a role to play In my Life. Want to be good and kind always. This is me. and this is my parade since 29 years and continuing......

-HU