The Stalker

Lurking in the bushes nearby, I sensed eyes on me, dark barren eyes like empty barrels. The chill down my back, prickled with instinct. Here we go again, I thought, going into fight or flight mode, that was more just a flight mode, because there was no way I was going to try fight this.

I started picking up the pace, still with perspiration on my forehead a little bit from my recent work out at the gym. As I moved with urgency, I clutched my bag like it could save me, pulling it closer to me like it was the shield Captain America uses. I caught myself wishing it was a shield in that moment. I’d have more chance of saving myself, I thought, somehow almost laughing at my thought, although it definitely wasn’t the time for jokes.

I did not dare peer into the bushes where I knew the eyes were watching me from. I just crossed the road, but as the adrenaline pumped through me, I found it hard to concentrate, so I almost tripped over my shoelace as I stepped up onto the curb from the road.

The wind was blowing like it was calling me away from my fear that I knew was behind me, but still lingering silently. The gaze was burning a hole in my familiarity and turning all that I once knew as commonplace into ashes, just with a single sinister stare. In the twilight of the evening, brightness was fading like someone was turning the dimmer down slowly over the horizon, mirroring the hope inside me that was flickering, but fading as my mood was not lit or dark, just desperate.

The cool night air felt fresher than it actually was on that spring evening, because of the chilling reality I found myself in. Everything was distorted, even my own mortality it seemed. Everything hung on a precarious ledge of chance mixed with danger, that swung its scent in the air like a cannonball. My brain was frantic, as thoughts flew around like arrows with nowhere to fly to, as the wind continued to blow my hair into my eyes.

I sped up, scuffling along down the road like I was in a fast-walking race, because I was so eager to run, but I did not for the life of me, want to start nor encourage a chase. I felt so tempted to look behind me to see if I was being followed, but my angst kept me only looking forward, as the darkness now fell in the sky like a curtain at the end of a play.

I knew my home was only a few blocks away, but right there in that moment of warped awareness of time, it felt like hours away. Every step, every second, every breath felt momentous and crucial to my very existence. Life felt like a blank slate, and only getting to my front door was my focus. Everything that had resembled life before had melted away like butter on toast. It was as though nothing else in the world mattered, and right then and there, I guess it didn’t.

Even though time felt frozen, my heart wasn’t. The beat was so rapid, it felt like it was working overtime, and the power and intensity of the beating made me feel like it was going to bust right out of my chest and explode. Until that night, I had only ever known fear from watching horror movies, but this was real. It was the first time for me to experience the desperation of fear’s cold callous paralysis it had over my body.

Adrenaline was the only thing making me move forward, because the terror alone could have made me drop to the ground and freeze still. Somehow, I managed to move closer and closer to my home, step by step and each agonizing moment by moment. The sun had now very much gone down now and until it had, the pinkish hue in the sky had given me hope and light. Now, the growing darkness only intensified my anxiety.

I turned another corner, wishing that, what I had seen was just a figment of my very expansive imagination, but I knew it wasn’t. Was there someone close at my heels, I wondered. Was the owner of those creepy demon eyes on my trail or were they still back in those bushes? I wanted to know, and that made me want to turn around and check, but I still couldn’t bring myself to do it. My thoughts were scattered and all my, ‘what ifs’ were scaring me into oblivion.

As I moved through the desolate streets, I tried not to think grim thoughts. My feet seemed to have a mind of their own, carrying the rest of my shaky body towards the direction of home, on autopilot. I was now only a short distance from my driveway. I longed to be safe inside my house more than I ever had before in my entire life. Going home complacently was something I took for granted every time before now.

In my frenzied panic of what could be behind me, I almost tripped over again. That scared me further, because I knew if I was being followed and I had fallen, I could then easily be captured. It would give my shadow in the night, time to gather speed, and I certainly did not want that to happen.

Speedily now I had managed to get only a street away from safety. The pitch black of night was increasing my panic so much, my rubbery legs were unsteady. In this part of town, the streetlights were dim. It was the ghetto part of suburbia that could have done with a makeover. Some of the parts of the streets in that area didn’t even have lights at all, and that was where I was about to walk, because it was the shortcut to my house. All I needed to do was get through a short alleyway, and then just a little further and I would be there, but as I took steps into the pure darkness, my heart skipped a beat.

In a whirlwind of fear, I started to pick up the pace, because I hated being in that much darkness. It was a feeling of stepping into an abyss of nothingness. All I could see were the shadows of the shrubs to the sides of me, and even those looked like funny shaped, shrimpy monsters. It was then that I just knew I should have taken the longer way home, because at least there were lights on that route. It was in that moment that I gasped for air because a hand, a familiar hand was now cupping my mouth from behind so I couldn’t make a sound. Would I take another breath?