Seeking Justice

The court room is full of people meandering their way to their seats. The hum of murmurs, whispers and shuffling fills the air as they all slowly begin to settle into their places and chatter amongst themselves. A loud creak breaks the noise as the old courtroom door opens, room seems to fall instantly silent as the Judge slowly enters the room.

From her seat she is nervous her heart tightens and she gasps as she tried to catch her breath, while her hands fumble aimlessly in her lap, absentmindedly tearing at the tissue she is clenching. Sweat starts beading along her forehead as she tries to stop the uncontrollable shaking, the last several gruelling months of dragging up her past demons have all come down to this final moment, this is it. As the Judge stands to address the court, her nerves become to much, for a second the court room seems to fade away and her memories take her back to the reason why she is here in the first place. To draw on her last ounce of strength she allows herself to remember…

A scared little girl stands in a dark room shaking and paralysed by fear, she knows that she is no longer alone in darkness of the room. Her body trembles as she hears him move closer, the hairs at the back of her neck prickles as she feels his warm, raspy breath be her ear. Her skin crawls as she feels his hand creeping up the back of her dress to remove her panties while the other hand covers her mouth from behind, she is not to make a sound as his wife, her older sister, is in the next room unaware of the events about to unfold. His breath gets heavier and feels wet in her ear as he moves in even closer, she can hear the all too familiar screeching sound of his zip and with a single thrust he is in. Inside she is screaming while tears fall freely from her eyes as her innocence dies slowly a little more with each thrust. What only takes a few moments feels to her like an entire lifetime has passed and with one final groan he releases her from his grip, zips up his pants and instantly leaves her to her secret shame. The deed is done. The little girl falls to the ground too exhausted to hold up her gaunt and trembling body. She feels muted, betrayed, alone and unable to escape. She huddles her knees to her chest and cries herself into a tormented sleep once again.

The gabble slams down on the Judge’s desk as he calls for order while the lawyer’s bicker over something that has been said, jolting her back to the reality of the courtroom. Remembering her purpose gives her a small amount of courage. She gradually begins to look across the divided courtroom of her all family members and then to her offender, how can he remain so calm and composed? How can he sit there and pretend that he did not do this? As she ponders these questions her gaze eventually falls to her older sister sitting promptly beside him. Memories of her childhood come to mind. The loving and fond times that she shared with her sister, she was like a mother to her, and the unshakable bond and trust they once held, all seems a distant fairy tale now, why won’t she believe me? I don’t understand. She looks down towards her fidgeting hands that have completely shredded the tissue into confetti like pieces now, fighting back tears at the loss of her sister. ‘She wont even look at me’ she thinks to herself as her the guilt she has for the whole situation starts to take hold and the nerves intensify once more as the cruel reality of the family divide sets in, no matter what the outcome is. She never wanted to hurt anyone, especially her sister.

The judge starts his speech about his final verdict and the court room falls harrowingly silent once more. He begins with; that while he believes these acts of heinous sexual abuse towards a minor have taken place but a verdict cannot be rule by that so due to; too many years passed, lack of ‘physical’ evidence and most importantly proof beyond reasonable doubt… Her throat goes instantly dry and she is struggling to swallow and breath while she feels her heart bursting inside her chest as the words ‘NOT GUILTY!’ seem echo throughout the court room.

In that moment her world completely stops and a sense of clam takes over, the commotion and disarray all around her blurs and falls quiet. She turns and looks towards the door way, surrounded by the chaos she sees the scared and broken little girl from all that time ago and for a minute in time they both stop, everything is still and their gazes align. The little girl, who was once frightened, trapped and abused is now, in this moment, is happy, smiling and angelic. The little girl walks towards her and embraces her with open and loving arms, nothing can hurt her anymore - they are one.

You see with or without the justice of the flawed court systems, her truth has been spoken and she is finally free.

Justice is served.