Jail Journal: Page 16

Thinking about moving to Hillsboro is kind of nice thinking more about it. The jobs on InstaWork will be more accessible now and i won't need o spend so much on transportation. It's hard to remember that I have a life waiting for me outside of here.

I don't remember what I dreamt of at all. That is pretty sad but, true. I am still uncomfortably warm. I know it is all the era calories. I can tell though that my thoughts have become more stupid and dull as time passes in here. I hope I can recover properly once I am out.

I think I need to write down things as if I won the lottery or as if money was not an issue. I called my attorney but its either too early or they don't answer on the weekends. It bums me out I barely finished one page of my Jail Tasks and my release date is on page 4. The distance between where I am and where that is wears on me.

I am going to be so busy when I leave here compiling all of these journal pages. 35 entries is crazy. I'll probably have 35 more by the time I leave here. That's basically 2 months of writing.

A nap sounds pretty good right now. The medication makes me very open to sleep. Also as I told someone else in here, sleep is the only form of time ravel we have.

I haven't dreamt but I get these glimpses of people wanting to visit me. Also someone having a baby? It might be the TV invading my dreams. As I thought, my mind is a bit better after a nap. It was getting a bit bad, to be honest. Luckily, the Abilify is allowing me to sleep any bad thing away. I wish I knew exactly if it were the food or medication, but I guess I just got to deal with it as there is nothing I can do about it.

I am having a bit of a bad mental health day. I am super antsy and unsettled. I am just trying to sleep it away but I think I actually need to move or exercise to help it go away. Looking at the picture I drew of Yuuichirou, I am just thinking, " This man is so fine.. He's finer than fine China.." It is kind of helping me transmute my antsy feelings to more of excitement., similar to a kid waiting for Christmas Day or something.

I ended up giving Deebeelyn my contact info to give to her daughter. I think she was quite happy with that. Hopefully, she doesn't think I am gay? Meh, artists come off as that all the time so, I wouldn't doubt it. I am not against gays but, I don't view women sexually at all and view that sort of as disgusting. But I am trying not to judge what works for another person, you know?I find it funny the eccentric inmates are wanting to be by here. I think it is because she does have LGBT kids.

It's only 5:30 so I feel I need to at least attempt to stay up a bit longer. I noiced that most people in here are Cancers. Brooklynn, Deebeelyn, Lily, Emily, Jordyn... Do Cancers commit more crimes or something? Perhaps that is some sort of Jail code of like.. not telling your sign and just being a cancer but.. that is so odd, also why would people just agree to that. I mean I do have some Cancer placements but most people don't say they're cancer if it is like in their 6th house or something.