A Change of Heart

The days always started off the same way. The sun slowly reached its arms over the western skyline, the city filled the air with its awakening roar, and Lucas Adams stumbled his way up the stairs with a head full of booze, regrets, and a deep longing for something more. That more being his soft warm bed at the moment.

No one ever tells you just how hard it is to be human. Society tells you what you should and shouldn’t do, turns around and does the opposite, leaving the bitter taste of apathy in the mouth of its youth.

So that’s how Lucas ended up living paycheck to paycheck trying to maintain his $1,200 a month 350 sq. ft. studio apartment. The pickpocketing was honestly just for fun, unless he really needed to make his rent on time. He didn’t mean for it to become a regular thing, and it wasn’t his fault he was so good at it. Some people sing, others dance, and no one gets upset when they use their natural born abilities. He was merely exploiting his own gift.

The soft tinkling of a bell behind the door broke him out of his thoughts as he came to the final steps leading to his hole he called home. He was greeted by a cacophony of meows, angrily demanding to be fed no less. He quickly shut the door before any mishaps had a chance to do their bidding and enjoyed the brief moment of freefall before hitting his mattress. The tinkling had yet to stop, and the noise became even louder, echoing in his ears as he tried to hide under the covers. Finally, he could no longer ignore the pitiful cries of woe. He begrudgingly dragged himself out of bed, and into his kitchen. A mini fridge, a gas stove, a basic sink and a makeshift countertop was all he and the screaming ball of fury needed to survive.

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” he muttered under his breath. The meowing and tinkling slowly subsided as he cracked open one of the last cans of cat food.

“Guess I’ll have to pay a visit to the market soon Nubs,” he called out to his feline companion. Nubs having no idea what he had just said, simply meowed in between bites of fishy goodness. He once again allowed himself to fall, this time into a deep sleep.

Sunday perhaps had discovered the secrets to time travel. Could it really be afternoon already? The heavy fog of sleep began to slowly clear out of his head, he yawned and stretched out his sore and aching body, with it bringing memories of the previous night. He took a moment to empty his pockets of his “findings”. A cellphone he had snagged from a man about to cross the street, a woman’s bag filled with cosmetics, and a small cat figurine from a small knick-knack shop. This month he was $200 short in rent money and he mentally braced himself for his landlord’s wrath. He remembered one last item he took from a strange looking man at a bus stop. There he had stood perfectly still with his eyes closed, as if he were the only person present among the sea of bodies. His dark colored clothing remained just as still as he, Lucas almost believed him to be a statue, and for a split second, Lucas felt like he was right there with the man, just the two of them in their own world. Perhaps that’s why he had felt so inclined to rid the man of his belongings, a little black book.

The little book was not much to look at. It was small and thin, no bigger than a cellphone. There were no words on the cover but as his fingers danced over the moleskin cover, he felt like there was something special about it. What secrets would he find written inside? With unyielding anticipation, Lucas opened the little book and saw… nothing. All the pages were empty, not a single word was written. Annoyed he rolled his eyes and tossed the book aside.

“Better get going before it gets dark,” Lucas called out to Nubs who sat watching her human friend with interest. Lucas made his way through the city to his local market, unfortunately Nubs did not have a job and therefore was unable to pay bills. It was up to him to provide her with sustenance or risk her leaving him for someone better suited for her needs.

As he walked the streets, he was greeted with the sight of the many unfortunate souls that called the streets their home. Lucas remembered he had lived that life long ago. He was one of the lucky ones who managed to escape the street’s cruel hand. He then noticed among the many tents a woman and her two children sitting on the floor. The air was icy this time of year, even the sun was unable to overcome her foe and warm those beneath her. Lucas saw as the woman used her entire body to try to shield her children form the cold and wrinkled fingers of winter. Lucas zipped up his sweater and kept walking. There was nothing he could do, he had nothing to give and yet something cold and heavy settled deep inside of his chest.

He soon reached his destination and scanned the isles for his objective. Once in the que for his items he reached for his back pocket searching for his wallet. He had noticed to things immediately. One, he had forgotten his wallet at home, and two, he had the little black book in his back pocket. Rolling his eyes, he stepped out of the line to put back the cans of cat food. He walked towards the only trashcan in the store, with full intentions to throw away the little black book. He knew there was nothing written in the book, but he opened it anyway.

Surprise was a small and childlike imp, that liked to settle into your veins before giving you a quick electric charge. Lucas felt his entire body become rigid with electricity, his palms began to sweat, and his brow scrunched together in confusion as he read the words neatly printed on the very first page of the little black book. He read and reread those two words, but his mind was unable to comprehend what they were trying to tell him.

Find me

And before his very eyes, an address faded in from nothing to black. Lucas quickly shoved the little book into his back pocket and ran outside, gasping at the air around him desperately trying to draw in as much of it as he could into his lungs. Pulling the book out once again, half expecting the words to be gone half hoping they wouldn’t, he saw the words printed as clear as he saw his own hand.

Find me

8953 Olive St.

It wasn’t a hard decision when it came down to it. There was an address and typically people resided in those addresses. Lucas would give back the creepy little book to the creepy man that owned it and he would be on his way, leaving this weird chapter of his life far vbehind him.

So, it was settled, Lucas set the address into his GPS device and was on his way. He once again walked the streets, hands deep in his pockets trying to keep warm when a sudden rush of heat washed over him. He looked up to see an apartment building raging with fire. He had been so deep in his own thoughts he hadn’t noticed the air was full of screams of panic and agony as he saw an old man being placed on a gurney by EMT. The old man’s skin was black with ash, his moans rang in Lucas’ ears. For a brief moment, he could see himself in the man’s eyes until they went dull, lifeless and was unable to anything at all.

In shock, he ran and ran not bothering with time or directions. His feet, finally gave unable to withstand the weight of is heart, brought Lucas to a crashing stop on the cold concrete ground. Tears ran down his face and his head swam through a sea of thoughts.

This is what life was. We are born full of life and hope, we are told if we work hard enough someday things can be different. Then suddenly, at some point we are no longer good enough for encouragement or opportunity. One misstep and backs are turned, and we are left behind. Everyone was out for themselves, and the ones above leave nothing for the ones below.

Lucas sat up, tears still in his eyes and saw he had arrived at his destination.

8953 Oliva St. was nothing but an empty lot with overgrown weeds and the like. It was a barren wasteland just like everything else. He stood up and looked walked around, in no particular direction. His foot came in contact with something hard and metallic. There was an edge of something poking out of the dirt. Lucas gingerly brushed the dirt off of what seemed to be some kind of handle. As he tried to pull it out of the ground the ground became loose and freed the metal box. The box was heavier than he anticipated, and he fell once again with a thud.

To his surprise, there was no lock on the box and just as easily as he had pulled it free from the earth, he was able to open it. Surprise pulled its second prank of the day, when Lucas finally came to realize what the box contained.

Despite being weathered and dirty from being buried in the ground for who knows how long, the contents of this box were anything but. Crisp and neat, the bills were lined up like sleepy babies in a nursery, peaceful and safe. He could not believe any of the events that had occurred. How could a seemingly ordinary day conclude like this.

There was only one course of action that had to take place after a day like this, after that, he would go back home to Nubs and forget all about the little black book and what he had experience today.

The man gave one last look at his little thieving friend. At first, he had planned to use the book for the boys one demise but thought he would allow to dig his own grave. He had been pleasantly surprised that it was not a grave the boy had carved out, but a ship. One fille with the sweet taste of youthful hope. Had the boy decided to allow his greed to succeed, his fortune would be a slightly colder and lifeless one. However, as he had watched the boy drop the metal box at the feet of the woman and her children, he knew it was not yet the boy’s time. The boy did pocket $200 but the man decided he would allow it. He had been there all along anyways, in the cold gust of wind that had chilled the woman and her children, in the fire that ravaged the apartment building, and in the reflection of the old man’s eyes as he gave his last breath. He smiled a quick crooked smile, he had found what he had lost, and he closed his eyes.