Word of the Day: 坊主

I... I don't know, I haven't been emotionally super upset but I feel like, instead of doing that, my body died or something and lost all energy. It is a struggle to even get up and sit here.

I think I am subconsciously wanting to take Eric up on his offer. But I feel like my hand is being forced here because, well I mean, I wasn't necessarily looking for what he was looking for.

I am just going to keep writing here so I can get my mental health figured out. I am just typing nothing.

Either way I'd have to live with it.

My back is starting to hurt a bit. It is completely dark outside at the moment. I need to sort bags and stuff and figure out what I am going to wear today. I don't really want to look in my clothes because two of my favorite pants had holes in the crotch so it means I have to buy another pair. I feel like just ordering the same ones again or something similar online. But I feel like that would just be repeating the process.

It sucks that I will have to take an L on math but, I think it will be better to wait until the end of my associates to tach

tach?

The best men are not those who have waited for chances but who have taken them; besieged chance, conquered the chance, and made the chance the servitor. -- E. H. Chapin

I saw a psychologist woman who was disappointed that a fellow psychologist didn't show his ethos online on his social media platform.

The subject matter was sort of... derogatory towards females in a certain way, saying that Calm = Safe for women. That qualities.

Well, yea in general it represents a lack of immediate danger, but it isn't always good in the long term.

I have to take a shower but, I feel I must write this. As I am listening to some sort of Slavic language at this moment. It is very haunting and beautiful. And sometimes there is the thing of.. something being too backwards to the point that, it can't be forgiven or... that you have to accept separation.

Then I see Yulia's... ah, yea I am probably crazy already at this point. I keep on talking about Yulia or thinking of Yulia. Yulia... middle name.. I don't believe in middle name.

I will have to make a choice soon. About what I need to do. I feel like I am going to die soon. I don't know what Tami is coming up with but, I mean, if there is nothing then she shouldn't call.

I guess I have to focus on my task of writing and completing enough to earn at least 10 minutes of freedom after that. God, I am time bankrupted right now. I guess I am wanting to bitch about her being 23 minutes late. But I usually cancel after 30 minutes. So I will give her until then then I will resume getting ready for my next appointment.

I do feel very weak. I feel like the music is making her not come but.. yea it is too pretty not to listen to right now, also I don't want to think about something more beautiful than right now. I want to just think about being in the sun and enjoying the day. After this. I am sure that is what I will do.

Somehow I managed to make it to Japanese class but I need to study a bit.

Wow.