Word of the Day: ぱりぱり

So today is Leo in Mars, it is supposed to be a great day and so far it has at least been interesting so I am glad about that. Though I am probably going to get a drink and draw tonight because this is too much of an adulting day or whatever. I am just annoyed at this point but my faith in this being a good day is still high.

The fish tacos last night were pretty good but I didn't really need to eat. I think i am going to fast on Saturday so I can enjoy Sunday's meal with no worries.

I was going to submit something to the challenge on Vocal last night but I didn't want t rush it and I was 500 words behind so, I gave up on it. I will save the story until I finish it naturally.

It was pretty much just my automatic writing so that is why I couldn't rush through it. It requires me to be in the zone and I just was not zoning last night thinking about today.

I found a new song I really like from the 2010's that is from Montenegro, a country I never heard in my whole life but I guess it is Balkan? Mm, yes. It is called Fali mi ljubav.I love the Balkan pop/electro music.

I am just trying to think of what makes me happy but I do think I need to be more sensible going forward. I don't think I'll ever care what people think of me with the more frivolous things but, I do need to consider what is good for me and what is not. There are natural consequences...

Like I don't think it is bad learning Russian in general but, it is natural that if I start to learn Russian, I will start to think of Jahon, maybe I'll look for a Russian boyfriend again, so on and so on, because why would I be learning it? I mean I know Japanese for no reason... I guess I can learn it as a memento for that. To prove to myself I was honest with my thoughts, but maybe it is too naive.

In general it is not bad, but maybe I got to think of my personhood and what is good for me as a person..

I guess I can continue to learn but not really put too much pressure on myself to learn.. Maybe. I am not sure. I guess also I don't know if I will have time to learn anything going forward.

I am a bit regretting not bringing my book to learn, I have a whole hour to work and I am probably going to finish this within 20 minutes... I guess I can try to see if I can squeeze some writing for that one challenge before she pops up.

I am definitely buying an alcoholic drink when I get home.

I am just tired already because I slept early yesterday and woke up at the crack of dawn this morning. Now that it is midday, I am just crashing. The tea I bought is barely doing the job keeping me awake. I am glad i asked my mom to pick me up after this meeting.

I don't think I am going to go crazy, I am probably only going to buy one or two. I much prefer weed but I don't think I am going to go back down that road again.

Ah, not too bad. 30 minutes left until the meeting. I guess I'll get over being jittery.