Why can't it be both?

"Teachers are in it for the outcome, not the income," someone in the club remarked. My education honor society in college, Kappa Delta Pi, was trying to develop a shirt design. This seemed to be the winner. It was a quote loved by the group of soon-to-be-educators. The goal was to raise money for school supplies to donate to a local classroom.

Oh boy, how naïve us undergraduate education majors were.

This familiar quote that once in the occupation quickly realized was incredibly toxic. Day-in and day-out, teachers sacrifice who they are to better the world for young minds who've yet to see even a quarter of it.

That is the teaching profession.

We teach young minds, not just in content areas. Let's be honest, are you really going to remember the difference between the present perfect continuous versus present continuous verb tense? I barely recall the difference myself, and I'm an English teacher! Besides, most content taught is literally a tap away or the beck and call of their voice, "Hey Siri, who fought in the War of 1812?"

No, teachers are not here just to teach content; we're here to educate the person. To provide life skills and experiences on what it means to be human. Who cares if the mitochondrion is the powerhouse of the cell – who is the powerhouse of the student? The student should be their own powerhouse. Teachers are the ones who help get them there.

"Those who do, do, those who can't, teach," so such another toxic phrase goes. I think it needs to be changed – "those who can't teach, do it, only those who can teach, teach it." It takes a particular skill set to be a teacher. In a world less focused on factory assembly lines and threats of a dunce hat or a ruler beating, the focus is more on creating a free thinker. How do we get students to question everything and make their own decisions supported by strong, sound reasoning? It's not simply logos, ethos, and pathos.

The path to get there is filled with distractions: media, mainly social media. No longer is there the distraction of just the rumor being passed on a piece of paper. Instead, in the distraction of going viral for the wrong reason – who even came up with the TikTok "devious lick" challenge? If somebody smacks me, am I protected if I practice self-defense or stand there and do nothing?

On the note of self-defense, has our society become so worried about not appearing weak? "My daddy told me if somebody hits me, I better hit them back, or I'm not going to be allowed to come home," a student remarks in my advisory class. This class focuses on teaching social-emotional learning. My only response – "you fight fire with fire, all you're going to get is a bigger fire," after all, when have you ever heard a fire chief order for more fire?

These challenges add to the load teachers have in teaching the student to be human. Let's not forget the other hats we must wear from a social worker, counselor… bodyguard. I'm just saying, the day I'm given a gun to "defend my classroom," I will quit.

And we expect teachers to effectively do their jobs?

But despite all of this, teachers still do the best they can. They effectively give and give and give. Teachers make their own "Room 203" spending their own money – I spent probably $1,200 just this year on my classroom buy supplies for students and make the space comfortable and "Pinterest" worthy since that seems to be a deciding factor of the teaching and learning cycle evaluation. But hey, thanks for the extra $100 public school system – now I just need to pay $1,100 of this current credit card debt. Let's not forget the rest that's yet to come!

What about our personal lives? I know of some teachers who spend more time with somebody else's child than their own – who worry about somebody else's child… more than their own. I may not have children of my own yet, but my husband promptly reminds me that he does exist. He's supportive of me but does get frustrated with the amount of work I do at home when I'm supposed to be "off the clock." He would make a great teacher – he's great with kids – he promptly tells me, "No thanks!"

"But, hey, I get off in the summer?" Said no teacher ever.

Most teachers pick up extra work (those school supplies don't pay off themselves). I happened to be one of the few teachers who "tortures" myself by teaching summer school. Last year was the first year I didn't – that's because they couldn't provide time off for my wedding. I became a summer camp counselor instead.

I love my job, though. The impact I get to see and hear from my own students. The genuine appreciation they express years after I have taught them. I even had seen the growth and knew the impact when my former 8th-grade students were so excited when they learned I would be their 11th grade English teacher. I'm reminded when I hear them say, "I remember this from 8th grade. This helped me so much!" or when they feel comfortable being able to open to me about their life. These are awarded to me.

I'm excited to see how they support one another in class. I have the confidence in my students to have mature conversations with one another, knowing they're not talking over each other. They're genuinely interested in what each person has to say. And listening – they really know how to listen, and that's a complex skill to come by nowadays.

"Teachers are in it for the outcome, not the income," yes, maybe part of that statement is genuine.

We're in it for the outcome of the student. We're not just in it for the mastery outcome based on state or common core standards written up on my board.

But here I am, staring at a negative bank balance. A bank balance of -$432. I am waiting on my next paycheck to fill in that negative balance and bring it to about $500. Then we're off to the imaginary races to see it go down to that negative amount before the next paycheck. Overdraft fees are just the icing on the top – I wish banks gave a teacher discount.

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This story is part of a series highlighting both the hardships and the celebrated moments of what it means to be a teacher. A series focused on the "ah-ha" that unfolded during the first five years of my teaching profession. I am working toward beating the stat that says 44% of teachers quit within the first five years of their careers. My goal is to help better educate the public on why that stat is so high, so perhaps we can lower it. My goal is to be there for other teachers and shine a light to show that they're not alone. My passion goal is to eventually compile these memoirs together into an advice book for new teachers.