Time Machine?

If there ever is a time machine built in my life I hope to use it. I must go to the past. I think I have lived a good life with ups and downs but there are some regrets. I would like to go to the past and try to rectify them.

I would definitely want to spend more time with my dear mother. I did spend a lot of time with her but in recent years before her death I did not spend as much time as I would have liked to. She was in a nursing home for more than 15 years and I would go two or three times each week to see her. I now feel I should have tried to go one more time each week whenever possible. It definitely would have been nice to spend more time with her.

I remember living in Indonesia when I was eight years old. I was there for a year. My dad had a great job working for a multinational company. Afterwards we had to return to India because he was transferred to work there. However, the year in Indonesia was so good. Personally, I find it ‘criminal’ that we could not live there for a longer time. I would want to go back in time and spend at least two or three additional years there. I remember the people were so friendly. The places we used to go were so nice. By the time I had started liking Indonesia we had to move. I know for months I was sad about leaving Indonesia.

I also wanted to spend more time with my baba (paternal grandpa). I distinctly recall it was December 1991 and after two weeks or so of vacation I had to return with my mother and sister to Dehra Dun from Lucknow in India. That time was the last day I saw my dear baba as he died a few months later in March 1992. The final day in December 1991 my train was in the evening. I saw baba in the morning and then went to play cricket with my neighbourhood friends. I was having a great day batting as I recall hitting three sixes off an uncle’s bowling (he was a neighbour who we played with; since he was closer to my dad’s age we called him uncle); I probably hit five or so fours off his bowling as well. As much as I loved batting it was rare that I batted so well. I had so much fun playing cricket that day and spent hours doing so. I was not able to spend those hours with baba. If I could use a time machine I would go back and have such great batting on the second last day of my vacation so that I could spend more time with baba on the last day of the vacation.

I remember the first time I told a girl I loved her. This happened in November 1993 in school in India. I felt heartbroken that she did not feel the same way towards me. However, I would have liked to go back in time and express my love in better words and longer than I did. Her reaction could be still what it was or (if destiny really smiled on me) it could have been in my favour. In any case, I just want to go back and live that moment again (albeit in a better way).

There are multiple such moments/times in my life that I would like to go back using a time machine. I know it is not possible but if there was a way I would like to definitely use such a machine for sure.