"Out there, I wonder how the world loves each other."

**Is your day going well today?**

There will be times when you may not want to answer this question, but I will still ask until you truly feel okay. In essence, it often starts with questions based on the method of first principle thinking. This approach provides you with multidimensional perspectives on various issues in life, and to truly live with a good spirit, let’s explore together.

**What I cherish about you is not just my own self; it's much simpler than that. What I cherish is your own self, a self that is loved in every aspect.**

The first lesson I learned about love was from my parents. What is love, Dad? When you were penniless, Mom still agreed to marry you, that is love. What is love, Mom? Even when Dad had everything, he still loved you like he did from the beginning, that is love. But what about outside? How do people love each other out there?

I see that people come together when both have nothing but youth. What sustains them through the days are promises; what keeps them together are acts of affection. The sweat-soaked locks of hair, fingers stained on their slender shoulders—they are infatuated with each other, feeling each other as something special, something they must pray to obtain every night. When two people are in love, nothing else around them seems to matter. But love often fails in the face of reality.

Tonight is what number of nights now? I don’t know anymore. We hold each other and breathe under the starry sky, those wonderful stars, but he cannot reach them. He can never pick them for you. You lean on me. Lean on the bitterness. Money not only decides the architecture of a home but also affects family life and marital harmony. Poverty and hardship are not empty words. We choose to be with someone because we feel happy and joyful in their presence. But this is in a carefree state without worrying about money. Once both are burdened with debts or face a deadlock in life, their mood will inevitably change from the beginning. Then I see two people begin to be silent; she chooses not to share, and he chooses not to ask. One day, a week, then a month—they drift apart. Once silence sets in, it means they no longer want to try. Perhaps some relationships can only go this far; perhaps some people are only suited to live in memories.

Out there, I see a young man captivated by a young woman from the first meeting. She seems to radiate an aura of splendor. He is fascinated by her stunning appearance and has thoughts like “It would be great if she were my girlfriend.” First impressions are often hard to erase. They become an obsession with an idealized image of the girl as the best creation, and he must have her. But later, when they are together, daily life brings about grievances. The image he had of her collapses as he realizes she is not perfect. In the movie *You Are the Apple of My Eye*, Shen Jia-Ning talks to Cheng about her flaws, saying she is also quite messy, moody, and unpleasant for no reason. I’m just normal; perhaps the person you like is just the person you’ve imagined when in love.

When people are in love, they still need admiration for their partner. But sometimes we confuse affection with admiration. Affection and admiration bring about similar feelings, such as pleasure, excitement, and a desire for attention and exploration of the partner’s inner world. However, they differ greatly in terms of longevity. True affection can withstand the ravages of time, something momentary admiration cannot.

Outside, I see two people with their hearts scarred. I see them tired and sometimes wishing for life to end. Yet, amid countless possibilities, they met, saw each other’s full, scarred selves, and wanted to be with each other because they found peace and comfort in one another. They truly wanted to do something to make the other feel at ease.

Out there, I see an elderly couple walking hand in hand through a hospital garden. The elderly woman complains about the cold, while the elderly man remains silent, tightly holding her wrinkled hand. One of the places I fear most is the hospital. Every time I enter, I see countless stories of hardship. But that afternoon, amidst the countless sorrowful faces of the sick, I witnessed a beautiful love. One hand of the old man held a bag, and the other held his wife’s hand as they strolled through the corridors, descending stairs slowly, with him turning around to help her step down. The afternoon shadow stretched long, but in my heart, there was a feeling of indescribable tenderness. Their intertwined fingers bind their lives together.

People often say that love in the past was simple and precious, which is now hard to find. They also say that old couples stay together more out of obligation than love. Love no longer holds any meaning for them, and their marriage is now just a matter of duty. But I don’t think so. Even though responsibility is one of the things that keeps us together, love is what binds these two people together for a lifetime.

Love has no specific definition. Though there are many ways to express love, ultimately, love is a combination of many elements. According to Sternberg, an American psychologist, love is described through a triangular model with three corners representing its components: intimacy, passion, and commitment.

1. **Intimacy**: This includes feelings of closeness, connection, and understanding.

2. **Passion**: This involves intense emotions, affection, and physical attraction.

3. **Commitment**: This entails the decision to stay together and work towards common goals.

From this triangle, we derive seven types of love:

1. **Liking**: This is a form of love based on intimacy without passion or commitment. It’s more like a close friendship where people feel safe and warm with each other but lack romantic passion.

2. **Infatuation**: This type is based solely on passion and physical attraction, lacking intimacy and commitment. It’s often fleeting and may not develop into a deeper relationship.

3. **Empty Love**: This love is characterized by commitment without intimacy or passion, often seen in arranged marriages or relationships where love has faded.

4. **Romantic Love**: This combines intimacy and passion but may lack commitment. It involves emotional closeness and physical attraction but may not yet have a firm commitment to a future together.

5. **Companionate Love**: This consists of intimacy and commitment without passion. It’s often seen in long-term marriages or deep friendships where the initial passion has faded but a strong bond remains.

6. **Fatuous Love**: This involves passion and commitment without intimacy. It’s characterized by whirlwind romances or hasty marriages lacking deep understanding.

7. **Consummate Love**: This ideal form of love includes intimacy, passion, and commitment. It represents the ideal relationship but is challenging to achieve and maintain.

Life is about experiencing different types of love, so it’s better to enjoy the present moment. A young man once asked a wise man why he couldn’t meet the right person. The wise man replied that the young man should go to a field and pick the most beautiful flower he finds, but he must keep moving forward without looking back. The young man found a beautiful flower but wondered if there was a more beautiful one ahead. As he continued, he noticed that the flowers he had passed were now more beautiful than those he was seeing. He returned empty-handed, having missed the best flowers while seeking something better.

This is a common mistake people make: searching for the perfect person and missing out on the best one they had. The truth is, no one is perfect, and no relationship is perfect, but we can create wonderful things each day within our relationships. Love and a good relationship are built from small daily actions—a morning greeting, a goodnight message, a call to check in. Even if nothing is happening, your partner will not mind spending time with you, listening, and patiently uncovering your story. They accept that it takes time to reveal who you are. They don’t dismiss you with a quick “poor thing” and turn away. Instead, your vulnerabilities are safe in their hands. You will feel grateful for them, knowing that they love you unconditionally.

Love is the hardest thing to grasp in life, easily missed, yet one of the most sought-after things. Because it’s hard to grasp, it’s hard to find and even harder to keep. Once lost, it’s best not to regret it. Let the clouds of the sky drift away and the falling flowers go with the water. Everything comes and goes by fate. Life is a journey back to nature, back to our origins. The few years of this life are a blessing to be with someone, and finding a soulmate to share love is never easy. Therefore, cherish and nurture them while you can.