Jealousy: A silent killer for all relationships

Jealousy, an emotion has the power to destroy even the strongest bond. The results of jealousy would be disastrous, and your relationship would be ripped apart. It's funny right, an emotion having so much power.

Jealousy can lead to constant arguments and a distance will be formed between you and your partner. The main reason for being jealous is that you are insecure in this relationship. If you find yourself having this uncomfortable feeling then start asking yourself Am I insecure? If the answer is yes, then ask Why? Most of the time the answers we seek lie within ourselves. Try to evaluate yourself, instead of taking your feelings and frustrations on your partner. That’s what this nasty feeling does, you get angry and frustrated easily and who do you take your frustration on? The answer is simple your partner of course. Thus, a journey of constant arguments and fights begins for you and your partner.

Try to ask yourself, did your partner give you a reason to feel this? If not, then get out of your head. If your partner did not give you a reason for this constant worrying then try to clear your head and think only happy thoughts. If you were cheated on in the past, then yeah it would be hard not to be so worried. If you had a bad past, talk it out with your current partner and be open about it, express yourself. If you shut your partner out completely then you are bringing up your past hurt to the current relationship. I don’t that’s fair, blaming your current partner for something your ex did.

I cannot express myself the importance of talking things out about your feelings and what’s bothering you.

Remember endless worrying will only weaken your connection

Constantly snooping around your partner’s phone and always checking up on them and calling them and asking where they are going 24/7. This jealousy will soon turn into some sort of control over your partner. You will keep tabs on your partner and you will expect your partner to tell you where he/she is going every second of the day. This will be the beginning of a toxic and unhealthy relationship. The moment you think that you have some sort of control over your partner, then it is game over. This relationship is doomed.

The most common reason when it comes to jealousy is the fear of abandonment and the worry of not truly being loved. You will find yourself being paranoid about what your partner is doing and what he/she has been up to. Constant worrying and restless nights will frustrate you further. You need to learn to manage these insecurities, otherwise you can kiss your relationship goodbye.

Unfortunately, it is common for couples to interpret jealousy as love. Unhealthy jealousy has the power to wreak havoc on a relationship as the jealous person will start to be more controlling day by day and this relationship will be entering its abusive phase.

As Katie Schubert, PHD and couples therapist once said :

“Communication will become more strained and tense because partners will be on the offense and defense instead of coming to a conversation empathetically.”

A jealous person will constantly make demands and question the other person. Slowly, jealousy will result in resentment.

If you are struggling with jealousy then think why. Are you struggling with low self-esteem? or are you afraid your partner will leave you someday? Try to find answers to these important questions, then only you can properly deal with these feelings.

Some tips that will help you deal with jealousy :

Have open communication about your feelings with your partner.

It is best that you recognize that jealousy is a sign of being insecure in a relationship.

Try keeping a relationship journal

Before you start pointing fingers and blaming your partner, look inside for an answer

Identify your feelings and get the answer to all your whys before talking to your partner.

Remember, just because you are feeling jealous that doesn’t mean your partner is doing anything wrong.