Holes in my Clothes
What did you get in to fight with Lawn Mower?
Marry was going on a girls night out with her girlfriend Sue, they planned on going out for dinner and bowling at the Rex bowling alley. So she got ready. She got in the shower at 4:00 pm. She put on a pale green western button up and she put on lady wranglers her boots and she braided her mid back length hair and put her makeup and was ready to go. Sue had done the same, they were really looking forward to this day. They both had went off to college. Sue went to a local college to take a writing coarse and the other business in it was online. However, they were so, busy with work and college that they had lost touch with each other. They would call and swap stories about what they were learning and what they had planned to do after college. Sue want to be an author and she finished in two months and was already writing she said that she was writing a comedy story call What the Hell Bobby? a story about how lazy that the government employees have become. While Marry had to go through 2 year to get her associates degree. She was not to happy about it but she needed to know the essentials of business. Marry had just graduated and they were celebrating. She got there and Sue was all dressed up and her makeup was done but there were holes purposely placed in her blouse and jeans. She thought to herself What the hell bobby? Have woke up in the twilight zone or something. I know that I have not smoked some funny stuff. She kept quite all through the drive and through dinner. They bowled and she bit her lip she did not want to offend her friend and risk the friendship that they had since kindergarten. She kept getting funny looks and then this young cowboy about 26 years old holler at her and said.
"What did you get into a fight with a lawn mower?" There was another one that asked,
"So, tell me honey how is the draft, do you need a jacket and new pair of pants?"
" It is the latest fashion, what are boys not into fashion or something?" Sue lashed back
"Not that kind of fashion, like I said earlier, what did you get into a fight with a lawn mower? By the way this is my best friend Grant and I am Tom and I will show you what we fashion we are into tell your friend to stand up." Marry stood up and they pointed at her.
"You see that, you see how she has no holes in her shirt or pants you cannot see any holes. We feel the same way when we see short, short but we joke behind there back and called it now that a new way of showing your ass. Also know as being an ass. What the Hell bobby? go change your clothes and do not tell me that hole in your clothes is the latest fashion. Those are work clothes that have met and end and need to be replace. Sue ran out crying her eyes out and Marry ran out after her and she thought well at least was not the one to break her heart. Marry told her,
"You know, there are some fashions that are just flops and apparently this one of them and to be honest I wanted to say the same thing. You are an author now. Let go shopping for new clothing, please!"
She said okay and when they were done she looked like a professional business woman.
About the Creator
Funny Kay
Hello, my name is Connie Goethe. I live in Killdeer, North Dakota, I am married, I have a dog and cat, I love coffee, meditation, yoga, and belly dancing. My pieces are parody, satire and sarcasm, I am studying old school. I am a poet too.
Keep reading
More stories from Funny Kay and writers in Confessions and other communities.
My Uncle is my Father
Hello, my name is Connie Goethe. I would like to tell you about my father. My birth father left before I was born, my Grandmother Dorthy and Uncle Cliff were there for my birth. My mother after I was out of the hospital, in Pocatello, Idaho. I was in there for 3 months, I was three month premature. My mother Hannah, could not afford the rent so she moved in with my Grandmother Dorthy and my Uncle Cliff he was trying to find customers, he was a carpenter and he had picked up work. My Grandmother was a nurse for Ivinson Memorial Hospital. While I was there as baby, I my uncle put me on his hand that I was the size of. He would be watch a football game and try not to wake me while he was watching a football game growing up was great. My and grandmother had moved to Craig, Colorado, after my Grandmother Dorthy had lost her job after drinking on the job. Because, she was taking care of a couple that had fell asleep with a cigarette in their mouth they did all that they could to save them. But they died on the table. My grandmother got a job as a waitress and my mother the post office. My uncle would always come to visit me and we would watch the Broncos play football. At the age of five the whole family and the neighborhood kids would play tag football. I would always take off walking and I would always be visiting the neighbor's dog Coca. I lived with my mother until I was molested at eight and was put into foster care and then my Aunt Carol and Uncle Cliff adopted me. They put through children's therapy. I was working along side my uncle who was now my father on my Aunt Johnny's ranch and she taught me that if you fall off a horse get back on a ride again. I fell off of Joe when I was gathering cattle for branding day. By the age of ten years old I had little brother that was cute as button and helped take care of him. I hated change diaper, I always asked Micheal
By Funny Kay4 years ago in Confessions
I Learned Too Early That Life Does Not Wait for the Poor
I learned very early in life that time moves differently when you are poor. For some people, life feels like a wide road with many choices. For people like me, it felt like a narrow path where every wrong step had consequences. I grew up watching adults around me struggle quietly, carrying heavy responsibilities on their backs while pretending everything was normal.
By On that6 days ago in Confessions
How to Succeed at the Benson Directory®
Congratulations and welcome to the Benson Directory® employee #22391! As our newest call handler, you will have the privilege of speaking with dozens of unique and interesting people on a daily basis as well as the opportunity to earn bonuses for high performance. Contained within this handbook you will find a set of ease to follow instructions designed to help you settle in to your new role and begin paving the way to success.
By S. A. Crawford3 days ago in Fiction
Comments
There are no comments for this story
Be the first to respond and start the conversation.