A Romanian Grandmother’s Untold War Stories

My grandmother’s eyes had a hint of mischief when she told me from time to time about her experiences during World War II. I can’t remember exactly what prompted her to tell those stories, but she never went too much into details anyway. What I know is that she was a young woman of about 20 at the time, living in a small village in southern Romania. She lived through the Soviet occupation and witnessed the tumultuous events that crushed various parts of Europe. The people who lived in those times were deeply marked for life and also transferred their traumas further to the next generations.

Romania’s role in World War II was complex and shifting. Initially, the country was allied with Nazi Germany. In November 1940 though, Romania joined the Axis powers, under the leadership of Ion Antonescu. However, as the tide of war turned against Germany, Romania switched sides again, in August 1944 and joined the Allies in their push towards Berlin.

During these chaotic times, my grandmother met soldiers passing through her village. I always get a bit anxious thinking about life in those times. As my grandma recounted, these men, likely Soviet troops advancing westward, would stop to ask for food and directions to Berlin. She said they were normal people, a bit rugged yet determined. My grandmother would recount how she liked to give directions, because it made her feel useful, even though she didn’t know exactly about Berlin. In her own modest way, she felt she was contributing to a greater cause. I wonder now how much she knew about the displaced people across Europe and the atrocities that had been committed.

Life in Romanian villages near Bucharest during the 1940s was uncertain and full of hardships, and lack of food, while at the same time many people wanted to help the cause. The war brought economic strain and the constant threat of violence. In the summer of 1944, Soviet forces advanced into Romania, fought, and eventually overthrew Antonescu’s regime.

For young women like my grandmother, the war came with challenges and dangers. While she may have been safer than women in occupied France or other parts of Europe, she mentioned that the presence of foreign soldiers and lack of food supplies and information during wartime made her feel afraid and vulnerable.

I haven’t even thought of asking if her brothers had been drafted for war at that time. I still have so many questions I wish I had asked!

My grandma’s wish to help somehow in the war proved that humans always have the desire to control something while surrounded by overwhelming forces.

I wish I had asked for more stories from my grandma and it pains me to feel this hole in the memory of my family. Her stories though, have given me the courage to resist injustice and fight for the right cause. I also became very curious about my family’s history and how it was affected by Romania’s past.

I plan to learn more about how history shaped my family’s trajectory.

What intergenerational blocks am I carrying still? These stories, which are missing from the current memory I have about my family, are howling inside me and I need to release them somehow. I need to find people who could tell me more.

I want to preserve and share my family stories, to honor my ancestors, and also to learn more about my identity and values. I plan to write about all the stories and collect them in a family book for my kids and the future generations.

Interesting historical fact: 80 years ago, the Soviet Red Army was entering Bucharest and started an occupation that lasted until 1958. Photos and article in Romanian here. Just looking at these photos made my stress level rise higher than normal, and I received a reminder on my Garmin watch. This confirms that I need to work deeper on these unresolved intergenerational war traumas I have been carrying.

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This is my response to the October writing prompt of ‘Autumn rituals’ from May More and Diana C. at Know Thyself, Heal Thyself. I originally published it here, with my pen name.

I wrote this story inspired by the following prompt, which triggered some deeper memories and feelings about forgotten traumas.

Honoring Ancestors — Connect with past family stories. Consider lessons learned and how they resonate with your life.

Author’ note: I wish my grandma were still alive, so I could ask her more details about how she felt during those times and what hardships she had to go through. I cannot imagine living through a war and a Soviet occupation without experiencing some trauma. My grandpa, from my mother’s side, fought in the war in the same war in the Tatra mountains. No wonder, I have been deeply triggered by any mention of atrocities and fighting against people in the countries where war is happening right now. I cry a bit every time for those people, while I learn how to deal with this intergenerational trauma carried on forward... until when? I don’t know. I hope writing will help.