A reason to betray a friend

Betrayal is a powerful and often painful act detested across the board, even evil persons and people who betray others hate it all the same. There isn’t a feeling quite as unique as being betrayed by a loved one in whom we’ve put all our confidence and trust, no amount of words can describe that feeling. Loyalty is valued by pretty much everybody, we expected it from friends, family, and even people we barely know to some extent, this is one of those rare instances where there is a clear-cut preference between two antagonistic feelings. I can’t imagine a person ever saying they love being betrayed. While betrayal is generally viewed negatively, understanding the scenarios where one might feel compelled to betray a friend can offer insights into the complexities of human behavior and loyalty.

I say all this so you measure just how important loyalty is and how much everyone detest betrayal, even by people who betray others. Now the question becomes, could it ever be justified? It can certainly be explained, but is there a legitimate reason to betray a friend?

The tenets of our relationship

Our relationship with literally everyone is based not just on the common emotions we share, but also a common understanding of the basic values we’ve agreed upon. A phrase which transcribes this clear is “birds of the same feather, flock together”, which means that we share the same emotions, values, principles, and rules which govern our behavior and interactions. This explains why there is a level of reciprocity which is expected in every relationship we have, because if I can give to you, I assume you should also have the same desire (or principle) to give back to me.

Betrayal is always so unexpected because it breaks this basic tenet, you do something which is unexpected in the relationship. It's difficult and quite impossible for you to be betrayed by a person you have no relationship with. You will just see it as their character since you don’t know them, but betrayal happens when a person does something quite unexpected there by breaking the basic tenets of your relationship.

The extent of loyalty

How far does your loyalty go? That’s a question we never ask ourselves until our relationship with someone is being tested. Generally, the closer we are to someone, the further we are willing to go for them. Loyalty is directly proportional to the love we have for that person. This goes even further than just the relationship we have with a person, sometimes we grant so much importance to loyalty to the point where we refuse to betray others just out of principle no matter what. That’s why even now it might be difficult for you to ever imagine a scenario where you would justify betrayal, meanwhile it happens all the time.

A reason to betray

There are many reasons which justify betraying a friend, we might not like it, but sometimes we have to put our feelings aside and do what is right.

Personal Gain or Protection

A time might come when you’ll have to make a choice between your interests or those of your friend, and in such a scenario, choosing yourself over your friend isn’t something crazy to do. Certainly this can get messy based on the scenario, but this is something we do all the time. Right now, you have a friend who could really use your help, but you decide to ignore them because you are focused on yourself. That’s not bad, that’s normal actually, everyone does the same thing, even that your friend.

Evolving

There are many species on this planet, some who had the chance to evolve and others who died out because they refused to evolve with the others. It might also happen that a person refuses to evolve with you, they decide to stay the same and do the same things which hold them back in life. In such a case, you’ll have no choice if you really want to evolve than to betray them and to move on with your life.

Broken tenets

Like I said earlier, our relationship is based on tenets which need to be respected by both parties, so when a person breaks those tenets then it comes as no surprise if the other person betrays them. This happens so often and people never really understand why, no matter how close I am to a person. Once they start breaking the tenets of our relationship, it's harder for us to be friends because I don’t recognize them anymore.

To use an extreme example of this, you can imagine having a friend who decides to become a burglar or to mug people, would you remain loyal to that friendship meanwhile your relationship didn’t start on that basis? certainly not, you’ll have no other choice than to betray your friend. In the same way two muggers who meet on that basis can easily get along because that was the tenet of their relationship.

Certainly our daily lives don’t get to these extreme, more often than not we have to put up with the mess our friends create and decide whether we are okay with it or not. It's only when it becomes unbearable that we take the stance of giving up on our friendship with that person. There are a lot of celebrities I admire and respect based off of the personality they portray publicly. But when I get to learn about their character, I am instantly turned off because it doesn’t match the tenets of the relationship they established with their public persona.

Consequences

A fear of consequences might push you to betray a friend, if they get into trouble so big it might affect you as well, you might opt to betray your friendship to protect yourself. A good example of this happens with our friends who are struggling financially, to avoid getting caught up with their problems we opt to move away.

Conflicting loyalties

You might have to choose what is much more important for you, especially in the modern era where, people often get caught up in scandals. Is your loyalty much more significant than your core beliefs and principles; respect, honor, decency, justice and much more. Your relationship might be tested when your friend decides to break one of these principles you hold dear. Imagine catching your friend stealing from an old lady, would you uphold justice or stand with your friend?

External influences ….

Conclusion

Even though we don’t like betrayal, there typically comes moments when we have to betray each other in order to ensure our personal interests. It's definitely nothing nice for the person who gets betrayed, but it's necessary for the person who does it. I am not here defending betrayal or saying you should do more of it, but at least with this you can understand why it happens.

Betraying a friend is a multifaceted issue with various underlying motivations and scenarios. Whether driven by self-preservation, conflicting loyalties, perceived injustice, or external pressures, the act of betrayal can have profound effects on relationships and personal integrity. Like many things in life, it's never just black and white, but a nuance we have to accept.

Thanks for reading ☺️