A Hopeless Crush

I know I have lots of life left to live but I want to share it with someone special. That’s not to say I need a significant other because I am extremely independent, however, it would be nice. The worst part of being single is that I’m a hopeless romantic, so every person I find attractive or develop minor feelings for my heart will go crazy. Once this happens I’ll start to fantasize about what it would be like to date them. It seems harmless because it’s all in my head but when I do this I always end up disappointed because my crushes never become anything more. Even though this is true it doesn't ever stop me from developing a crush, which leads me to my current hopeless crush. I won’t reveal too much about this person because I am afraid they will see this even though that most likely won’t happen, I’m not going to risk it, so for the sake of this story, I will call this person in august after all that’s when I met them.

I met august in a class I have, it’s a fun class but there aren’t many opportunities to talk with other students. I kid you not the first day of class my heart went crazy for August. All it took was for our eyes to meet once and my heart was hooked, which has never happened to me. The glance lasted for about .002 seconds and that was enough! Ugh, this heart of mine is so hopeless. Anyways I don’t see this person’s face often because we are always wearing masks but their eyes are beautiful to me. If you were to see them you’d probably think there is nothing special since August’s eyes are dark brown, but when our eyes meet I can’t help but smile. It hasn’t been only one glance though I catch August looking at me from time to time and when our eyes meet it’s almost like they’re confessing their feelings for me. I love when our eyes meet because my heart starts racing and I get butterflies in my stomach. I wonder if august also experiences these feelings. I really wish that happens. I wish they could confess their feelings for me in the rain or through a song, or pull me in for a kiss and say “from here on out your mine”. Oh, how my heart would explode from excitement. How romantic would that be! That only happens in movies though and in my heart’s fantasies, but you can’t blame me for wish something so beautiful would happen.

The sad thing is I don’t know this person that well but from what I can tell August is kind and thoughtful or at least that’s what my heart wants to believe. I can’t truly know unless I get to know august but I’m not bold enough to start a conversation with them. As a hopeless romantic you can imagine how frustrating it is not to be able to pursue my crush. Honestly, my hesitation to pursue August is because it’s hard for me to differentiate my fantasies from reality, so I don’t know if this person has any real interest in me. For all I know this person could be the exact opposite of what my heart has imagined and if that is true my feelings are not for august but the idea of them. I want to get to know this person better, but I don’t want to make things awkward if august doesn’t see me the way I see them, still, I would be more than happy to be their friend so maybe I can start there.