Memoir | Savvy Supervisor | Part V of VI

Throughout my international adventures as a representative of the U.S. Department of Prominence, I had the honor of working alongside Mr. Sam Hertzberg, my supervisor and a high-ranking government official.

I greatly valued his forthright approach during our trip briefings and debriefings, as well as in our open discussions whenever I contacted him during difficult circumstances overseas.

This is a small tribute to him.

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Here are some of his unforgettable remarks:

 “Mia, we got a complaint about your unprofessional manner. You cannot swear at one of our employees who accidentally grabbed your buttocks.”

 “She did what?! Okay, I hoped you kissed her back if that is what it took to get you into that country.” My reply: “There’s no way I kissed that woman. I pushed her off me and shook her hand. I adore men, not women.”

 “Mia, what happened to your lips? Did you take the doxycycline drug a week before you traveled to West Africa?”

 “Mia, how did the airline lose your luggage? Okay, go shopping with the government credit card to buy some clothes. Be sure to pay the bill when it arrives. Just don’t buy a car with it.”

 “Mia, we will not send you to the Middle East. A man must always be with you. You cannot speak to a man. The men must speak. I don’t think you can handle that. You are now scheduled to travel to China.”

 “Mia, please remember to conduct yourself responsibly during your time in China. Let’s avoid any potential diplomatic mishaps. And in the unlikely event that something does go wrong, rest assured that the U.S. will be there to assist you.”

 “Mia, do not buy cigars while in Cuba; it is illegal to bring them back to the U.S. Although, I would love to smoke a Cuban cigar.”

 “Mia, we would like you to become a permanent global traveler beyond the two years you have been assigned. You have the street-smarts that we like.”

 “Mia, how did you get yourself out of that difficult situation? No, don’t tell me, we are glad you did, and is okay.”

 “Mia, you cannot save everyone in Africa, so stop giving away all your money.”

 “Mia, we did not know there was an uprising in that country, and all flights were canceled in the region. Come back to Washington. You watch cable news more than me.”

 “Mia, you will be flying over the Bermuda Triangle, also known as the ‘Devil’s Triangle.’ Tell your pastor to pray for you.”

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(Copyright © 2025 by Mia Z. Edwards. All rights reserved.)