“The Not-So-Pleasant King” - song
For the Harmonic Verses challenge
A song written for the challenge and for funsies (I'm not a professional songwriter). Sound wise: think rock. Or perhaps wacky rock. There will be no video or audio attached - I've had enough embarrassment to last three eternities already (sorry). Hopefully the tone comes out in the lyrics.
*
[Verse 1]
My throne is made of the finest material
Of leather from afar, of gold and steel
No one can take this from me
You think I care about your sheep or family?
Why not bow and pay me a thousandfold
Your complaints are getting old
I'm not ignoble, I'm just right
You may kneel, peasantry, for I am quite the sight
*
[Chorus]
I am the king, your king, the one and only
The dais isn't high enough for my greatness
I am the sovereign, the ruler
Sculpt another statue in my likeness
One gold coin is worth more than all of you
With millions in my treasury, it’s only getting taller
You all shall offer up your due
There is no escape, pay the toll
Dear peasants, I was born for this role
*
[Verse 2]
Bring me my wine, the finest drink
Let's raise our glass to our venerable leader with a clink
It's me, your loveable king, dear follower
Come on, don’t make me fold my arms and tap my feet
For you gaze upon someone so much greater
My robes are a hearth of delight
Pray to me now or embrace the winters fright
*
[Verse 3]
My serfs are here for me
I’m sure we can all agree
As are all of you, the people who matter not
In the grand scheme of our plot
I will eat your food with a laugh so hearty
The guards will protect me, but I’ll be docking their salary
When I’m done, you’ll love my many heirs
Hey, what’s with all the swords and glares?
*
[Chorus]
I am the king, your king, the one and only
The dais isn't high enough for my greatness
I am the sovereign, the ruler
Sculpt another statue in my likeness
One gold coin is worth more than all of you
With millions in my treasury, it’s only getting taller
You all shall offer up your due
There is no escape, pay the toll
Dear peasants, I was born for this role
*
[Verse 4]
With hand to mouth, I am gobsmacked
The respect of my people untapped
I am the king, did you not hear?
This cell won’t hold my personage
You’ll soon be seeing the rear end of my image
Imagine me, the greatest king fleeing
When I return, those taxes will be increasing
*
[Bridge]
Driven out of my home, my land
This is going against all I had planned
The ownership remains mine
Now and forever until the end of time
You give yourself temporary freedom
One fatal mistake
I still live! Ha-ha!
*
[Chorus]
I am the king, your king, the one and only
The dais isn't high enough for my greatness
I am the sovereign, the ruler
Sculpt another statue in my likeness
One gold coin is worth more than all of you
With millions in my treasury, it’s only getting taller
You all shall offer up your due
There is no escape, pay the toll
Dear peasants, I was born for this role
*
[Final verse]
With barque full of gold
I sail the seas, my greatest story still untold
I will return, my glory, my power
Everyone will kneel, every soul has a price
There is sometimes more to gold: there is someone's life
A bribe, blackmail, I will have what is mine
Oh, it will be so very, very divine
*
[Chorus]
I am the king, your king, the one and only
The dais isn't high enough for my greatness
I am the sovereign, the ruler
Sculpt another statue in my likeness
One gold coin is worth more than all of you
With millions in my treasury, it’s only getting taller
You all shall offer up your due
There is no escape, pay the toll
Dear peasants, I was born for this role
_________________
Author's notes
Disclaimer: I am not the king.
About the Creator
Euan Brennan
UK-based. Reader, writer, gamer, idiot. I love creating stories. Working on some long fiction.
Taking a little break from Vocal~
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Comments (10)
Very cleverly written… excellent condescending tone. I especially like: “Bring me my wine, the finest drink Let's raise our glass to our venerable leader with a clink It's me, your loveable king, dear follower Come on, don’t make me fold my arms and tap my feet”🙃
I like the unexpected rhyme that is between these words, 'from me' and 'family' Definitely giving me that grungy vibe, also the fact that the lyrics were pleasantly unexpected. Lol, the chorus is brilliant. With a touch of humour, but a gloomy undertone. We are tied to paying our dues, even if it means we shrink and the king grows in power and wealth. Verse 2 is making it even more clear how clever it is to write from the prospective of the king, the bitter taste in the mouth, comes through perfectly this way. Damn, the bit about the tax increasing. Boy are we doomed. This was a delightful read, lovely to sing along. PS, I don't believe you're not the king, lol.👌🏽
The Arrogance and the ego of the king is a masterpiece. Adding my own funky tune to this. I can totally strut around wearing a crown and robes
I absolutely love the cockiness of the king! Like Komal said, zero self awareness 😂
ha, lol, reminds me of a Bard song, absolutely wonderful
This was an absolute riot! I could picture a guy in velvet robes with a glittering crown and absolutely no self-awareness strutting around the stage. No audio needed—this song already plays loud and proud in the theater of my mind. Rock on, Your Majesty! ✨😊
Love your disclaimer!! Ha! Oh god I loved the serf and pleasant lines so much! Great stuff Euan.
"The guards will protect me, but I'll be docking their salary," & "One gold coin is worth more than all of you" are my favorite lines. The king sounds much like another modern-day leader, but I shall not name any names! Nice job, Euan!
Whoaaaa, I sang this to my own wacky rock tune and I had a blast! Also, your disclaimer hahahahahahahaha. Loved your lyrics!
"I am not the king" 😄 But all jokes aside, it's a little scary how many people came to mind in place of the king. The "I know I'm a jerk, what'cha gonna do?" attitude is quite popular in the world right now. I like how you put it all together!