narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer
Bio
I am an expert in understanding narcissist and psychopathic behaviors. I have over five decades of experience surviving gaslighting, blame shifting, triangulation, pathological lying, smear campaigns, emotional abuse.
Stories (14)
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Throw Me To The Wolves And I Will Come Back Leading The Pack
Dumping a bucket of water on a wicked witch is like dumping a bucket of truth on a narcissist. The difference is this. You can collect water from any place to dump on a witch. The hose, the sea, rain, the toilet. It doesn't matter. Dump and watch them melt.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer6 years ago in Psyche
Over Time, the Narcissist Exposes Himself and Is Publicly Seen for Who He/She Is
Narcissists and psychopaths lie. They are reliant on the reactions of others to feel alive, be relevant, to exist—they talk continuously. When they are not interacting and getting reactions (supply) from others, they are irrelevant. Think of a phone without a battery in it. That is how they feel. A sense of nothingness.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer6 years ago in Psyche
In Plain Sight
She was not at all what I expected. After reading part of her manuscript, I assumed she would be meek, timid, small and quiet. She was nothing like that. She was filled with happiness, magnetic, joyous yet calm and grounded. She laughed easily and made people feel comfortable in her presence. She was likable and filled with positive energy.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer6 years ago in Families
Narcissists and Psychopaths Cause and Create Chaos
Narcissists and psychopaths manufacture chaos. In part, this is because they are not integrated and chaotic. They also most often were raised in chaotic environments that lacked structure and consistency. They have learned that by creating chaos and confusion, they are best able to portray their victims as "unstable." Normal people do not function well in chaos. Children thrive and crave structure. These folks intentionally create chaos in the lives of children, which lead to the children reacting in understandably negative ways.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer6 years ago in Psyche
Narcissists and Society
In this tragic state of school shootings, women being killed by their partners frequently, constant news of corruption in our family courts and movies and music industries, Child Protective Services, Police, Social Workers, the foster-care system, political offices (all of which serve as processors and purveyors of pedophilia and child sex trafficking), we are desperate for the "reasons."
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer6 years ago in Psyche
Divorcing a Narcissist
Divorce is never pleasant. Divorcing a narcissist is traumatic and causes Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and Complex PTSD. While every person who enters into a relationship with a narcissist is a victim of abuse, I will use the word, "target."
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer6 years ago in Psyche
In the Beginning, Narcissists Do These Things
Narcissists do not come with a warning on their forehead. They do come with a deeply limited repertoire of behaviors and interaction styles that are not glaringly obvious, yet are present from the beginning.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer7 years ago in Psyche
Choose to View Other People in a Positive Light to Maintain Your Own Happiness
When we are describing another person, particularly if we are explaining a difficult or stressful interaction, we sometimes make the mistake of using qualifying words and adjectives that are negative. We say things like, “I have a tyrant boss,” and, “He doesn’t get along with anyone, he's a difficult personality.” We mean no harm; however, we are perpetuating negativity when we incorporate this style. To maintain happiness, we need to be free of this negativity.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer7 years ago in Humans
Flying Monkeys Are Predators in Waiting
Ending a relationship with a person on the narcissistic spectrum is daunting, draining, exhausting and painful. If you were married with children it is much worse as these folks aspire to "win" and children are subject to collateral damage. These folks are incapable of being decent parents due to their own limitations. This shows itself promptly when they file for sole custody, attempting to hurt a protective parent on the deepest level and showing they have no regard for the children, who they view as possessions.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer7 years ago in Humans
The Narcissistic Smear Campaign
There is only one type of person that creates smear campaigns, a character disturbed individual. Think about it for a moment. Have you ever thought, even once, to intentionally humiliate, embarrass or impact the view of a person’s supports by contacting them and saying false things about a friend, family member or loved one? If the answer is “no” it is because you are not character disturbed. This behavioral trait is a hallmark of narcissistic personality disorder and sociopaths/psychopaths but is also seen in other character disturbances.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer7 years ago in Psyche
The Narcissist's Smear Campaigns Say Everything About Him/Her and Nothing About You
There is only one type of person that creates smear campaigns, a character-disturbed individual. Think about it for a moment. Have you ever thought, even once, to intentionally humiliate, embarrass or impact the view of a person’s supports, by contacting them and saying false things about a friend, family member or loved one? If the answer is “no” it is because you are not character-disturbed. This behavioral trait is a hallmark of narcissistic personality disorder, and sociopaths/psychopaths, but is also seen in other character disturbances.
By narcissistic whisperer, Andrea B. Wainer7 years ago in Psyche
