Maria D

Joined September 2021

52 stories

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Just someone who enjoys to write, and explore her mind. I love to read, especially when they turn into movies in my head.

Stories (52)

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Happy Birthday Baby
I apologize I know how much of an inconvenience it must be for you that I have trouble talking about my feelings and expressing my emotions especially towards you. Since I was younger I've had trouble connecting emotionally, talking about how I feel, even when I was happy trying to express it was just awkward. I really hope this letter gives you an idea of what you mean to me, and how I feel about you.
By Maria D4 years ago in Humans
Crystal Clear
I sat on the ground inches away from his lifeless body thinking and contemplating whether or not I should end my life at this very moment or spend life in prison with my tail between my legs like a scared puppy, watching my back and alienating myself to a small space and the anxiety attacks that were destined to follow. I took the knife to his chest and stabbed him right in his heart so he could feel the pain I felt when he tore mine apart. Twelve times exactly, one for each time he hurt me, abused me, and cheated on me. The anger built up inside of me allowed me to follow through and end his life not only to feel at peace, but to enjoy watching him slowly bleed out and fight for his life up until the very last gasp. It wasn't always this way I remember when we were just kids ourselves. We used to save up coins we would find on the ground until we had enough to share a cheeseburger at the nearest Mcdonald's. Sometimes we would even walk when our parents were to busy to drive us. The teachers hated having us in the same classes it was the class clown and the best friend who couldn't shut up about how funny he was. Once we hit high school right before college something between us sparked. One night we were down at the port where we used to sneak out to relax, enjoy the water and to fish. I used to love throwing the net and catching the cutest little fishes and crabs, he used to laugh because I used to get so excited for the little fishes that weren't technically all that special especially to people out there fishing for a big o'l red, or something they can take home and whip up for dinner. So we were sitting at the edge of the bridge dangling our feet over the water, fishing poles in our hand when the moon light set and starting reflecting over the water. It was so beautiful, it was a quiet night so the sound of the waves made it all just a bit more perfect. We started reminiscing and talking about when we were younger and what was going to happen when we graduate and move away to different cities. I looked him in his eyes. " You know nothing can ever really separate us right? Your my soul mate dude I love you so much promise me you wont forget about me?" I felt his hand suddenly reach over and clasp onto mine overlapping our fingers and caressing each others thumbs. " I love you" is all I heard right before finding myself with my eyes shut, lips on lips, it felt as if we were the only people in the world right now. I swear fireworks went off in that very moment, or something like it because the sparks we felt were very much real. That night we decided we could not ever end this friendship and that meant making sure we stayed glued to each other one way or another, and it worked out. We were infatuated with each one more than we had ever been, even being a state away at different colleges the bond was strong. We used to video chat, call, text, every single day. We never missed that goodnight call and kiss. It was pretty much like that through out our whole college years but it was worth it. Fast forward 5 years later living in a one bedroom apartment in Chicago, with a one year old daughter named Bella. She was our everything at this point life was perfect, and it was with the perfect man.
By Maria D4 years ago in Fiction
Life to Reality
There are so many things going on in the world right now ranging from Covid-19, the Government, debt, murders, sex trafficking, it's such a scary world we live in. It's gotten to the point where i'm scared to go outside so many people are dying in the comfort of their own homes imagine what could happen outside. My anxiety is at it's all time high the highest it's ever been. My boyfriend and I, who have been together for 5 years wanted to bring a child into this world, but lately, we've decided to hold back on that. It's been our dream for a while now, you can imagine how bad it felt to decide not to do this because of the world we live in today. Family, and friends are killing each other, if they can do that with no regret, no pity, no remorse, imagine what they will do to others. This old man was shot, and killed on camera because the gunman was having a bad day. That is sick, and sad. People do crazy, absurd things for the internet to gain a couple moments of fame, it's honestly dumbfounded. Children are being killed by their own, being kidnapped, our daughters, sisters, cousins are being used for sex trafficking. It hurts to even imagine the pain and suffering those innocent children go through. Kid's are literally being raised by kids, with no respect, no manners. Imagine them in a couple years when the world has gone mad. Life used to never be like this, if only i was born in the 1900's. Maybe around the 60-70's. I like to think things will go back to the way they used to be, the world will be a bit safe, but that's my imagination talking. I've decided to prepare myself for many things in this life, and I kept trying to avoid death, but let's be realistic. I hope we make it out of this era, out of the slum. If only people were willing to make a change. It starts with us, but not every one of us cares. The amount of evil in humans is unremarkable and the fact they feel the need to hurt others, including innocent people, even animals. Now, it is easy to say we want to make a change but doing something about it is the tough part. How do we even begin when everyone takes everything as a joke, especially the generation that is going to lead the future generations if you ask me, it’s a scary thought. Now that students are attending school online due to covid it seems as if no one cares to attend their classes. Schools are at an all time low, parents are not pushing their children to focus on academics. If I’m being honest sex, drugs, money, and fame have tooken over the minds of our people. It amazes me the stupid things and lengths people are willing to go through to be liked by thousands of people on the internet. Maybe it’s the big payout they receive, but I wonder. Is it worth it? I hope one day the world will change and be a better place. Also, I think it’s very important to state how important it is to have safety to keep you and your families safe. Maybe a gun, or a taser something that you can put into plan when it comes down to it. These are just my thoughts and opinions and many may and will say I am afraid and that’s okay because yes. I am AFRAID. The world we live in today is such a scary place.
By Maria D4 years ago in Confessions
Who You Are
There is no place I can think of that makes me sane, no place that I know will make me feel safe. That was until the day I met you.
By Maria D4 years ago in Poets
Love Yourself, Literally
My best friend and I are very close we can talk about anything, which one of those things being masturbation. I know that might sound a little weird but it's a natural thing and being able to talk about tips, tricks, it's a good feeling. I really don't understand why people are so afraid of their own body and the thought of masturbation. I personally love it, and I think it's great. I also think being comfortable with yourself is a key in having a happy successful life.
By Maria D4 years ago in Filthy
The Desire of Fire
The wood is on fire like my body for my desire, as it burns it keeps me warm. Eventually it will slow down before being blown by the wind
By Maria D4 years ago in Poets
Love Is To Die For
I remember the first time he told me he didn't love me anymore. It felt as if someone had took a knife to my chest. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep it felt as if a part of me had been chunked away at the speed of light and it was too fast for me to catch it. The second time he told me he didn't love me, it hurt. It hurt so bad, but it was much easier to digest. Finally the third time was my wake up call it was what I needed in order to see that I needed to leave. I am worth much more than this, and no one should ever treat me less of what I am. So I did. I left. I packed up my stuff got into my little beat up 99' car and hit the road. I didn't know where I was going, I stole some money from his savings it's the least he could do. For the first time in a long time I had adrenaline, I was excited. I had the windows down, hair going crazy, but I was smiling. I was smiling bigger than I had ever smiled in the whole life that I could actually remember. My first thoughts were to go back home to ma and pa, but I wasn't ready to face everyone just yet. I needed some time for me, to find myself, they would hear about me leaving of course but no one is going to know where I go where I end up. It's a new start to my new life wherever I end up tonight is where I will begin my journey, I just kept on driving.
By Maria D4 years ago in Fiction
Forgotten Sophie
I could no longer breathe as my lungs started to fill with smoke, my eyes were now glued shut, all I could do was listen. I kept hearing those pleading cries, children yelling in distant "Help, Help! Help us somebody please!" I yelled back, and reassured them I was here, but it seemed as if no one could hear me I was becoming desperate running further into the agoning fire. "I'm coming, i'm coming where are you?!" I plead out as loud as I can. The closer I got to the children screaming the most horrible painful yells the more faint they became. I was starting to lose it, I needed to help those children!My life depended on it! I could not let these children die, I have to save them! My chest started to tighten up I could no longer think or breathe, I felt as if that very moment I was dead. I was fighting so hard to catch my breath until I woke up. I woke up from that nightmare, the same nightmare I had been having for the last couple months. It started when I moved in to my new home, which was in the outskirts of a quiet town in deep South Texas. I lived down the block of a few Hispanic families, who have become some of my really great friends. One night I specifically remember them telling me myths and folktales, and how they really do believe in spirits, and things you would have thought were only in movies, and books. They talked to me all night, and had all these different stories. So many legends it was hard to keep up, but they were interesting. They even told me some of their very own experiences which made me really believe I was being haunted. Maybe I did something in my past life i'm not proud of, maybe I have a curse, but I just don't know why this would be happening to me. I decided to do some research on recurring nightmares. I even googled what it meant to dream about children yelling in a fire, myths, legends. It was until I randomly had this thought to google my home, the state, and that's when I spotted something that stood out to me, so I had to click the link. " Family stunned, 4 children dead in Texas house fire” I couldn't believe it, it was a picture of my home, it looked different. I would have never known this house was once covered in charcoal and burnt pieces of someones life, someones children. I was devastated and my heart sank. I was also so afraid, if this happened so many years ago, am I being haunted? Are these children bad, or did I already know about this and that's why I keep dreaming about it. My mind was all over the place, and i was scared. I didn't know what was going on, when suddenly I hear a knock on my bedroom door. I closed my eyes, and prayed it would stop! I ran and hid under my blankets, as if that would save me. " dear god, if you can hear me please forgive me .."I started to pray so hard, and begged god to make the knocking stop, and it did. I reached under my bed and grabbed my gun right before dialing 911. I was alone, there’s no way someone should be knocking on my bedroom door, I tell the dispatcher as she let's me know someone is on the way. I sit and try to stay calm and not hyperventilate I don’t want to be heard. " This is the police open up!" I hear downstairs, I was too afraid to say anything, and if there was an intruder in my house I didn't want to get caught. My bedroom door was not locked so I dont undertsand if someone was knocking, why they just didnt open the door, but whatever I’m glad they didn’t! The police finally reach my room and asks if anyone is in here, and I slowly uncover myself. "me.. me, im here" I say scared, I know they could hear the fear in my voice. They ask me what's going on, and I tell them I thought someone broke in. "Well ma'am there are no signs of forced entry, up until we had to knock the door down. We checked every room, door, window, maybe you just heard something happens all the time." I nod. An older officer approaches me and proceeds to ask me if i live here alone. "Yes, yes i do.. Why? is there something wrong.?" He proceeds "Well no, but haven't you heard the stories about this very house? I used to get calls from a couple who lived here a couple years back. They used to hear things, see things we honestly thought they had gone crazy. They were nice people, but sadly one day they died in a fire, here at this very house. Some say it was suicidal, others say they used to fight like wildcats, no one ever knew what really happened that night." "a couple?" I ask, "What about the 4 children that died here in the 80's? I read about it online, and didn't know much about it until today " Officer Kingsley took off his sheriff hat held it against his chest, looked down and was hesitant to speak. " yes ma'am that actually used to be a foster home, a home to the Mildrege family. They used to foster them kids left and right. Sweet people, too bad they weren't home that night. They had left the oldest, Abigail in charge of her younger siblings, see they didn't like to separate the children that came in pairs or more. It would cause a toll on the kids. They had gone out to the grocery store, and when the returned the house was in flames. Cops, firefighters everyone was already on the scene. We were too late, we couldn't save them sadly. When we reached the location, every door, every window was shut when we finally broke down the door it was bad. The fire had spread like a wildfire, it was full of smoke, and our men went in there, and barely made it out. One of the men said it was like he was in hell, the walls were closing in, he couldn't breath but all he could do was hear the yells of those innocent children." Chills filled my body from my feet up to my head. I couldn't believe what I just heard. I was hesitant to go back inside, but I knew I had too. I mean this was my home after all. I checked all locks, put on some tea, and went to my bedroom. I was afraid to fall asleep, to dream. Luckily the tea made my sleepier than I noticed.
By Maria D4 years ago in Fiction
Christmas Delight
I love the snow and the comfy clothes the hot chocolate, and the marshmallows the smell of gingerbread cookies, a hint of peppermint too
By Maria D4 years ago in Poets
Ms. Greene and My Johnny
I could never really tell if he loved me or if I was just another bump in the road, but whatever I went with it. I needed protection, a safe space, reassurance and he was all those things. We met when we were in high school, and as many would say it was love at first sight. His name was Johnny, and of course I was the sweet o'l Mary Bell. See, he was a cowboy, and I had always wanted one of those, but he was different. His smile used to light up the whole room, shoot, even the teachers would drool over him even though they were too smart to slip up I definitely noticed all the side eye attention he received. Well one Sunday afternoon Johnny and I decided to go for some ice cream, and call it a date. We went to this nice little cafe around the block called The Coffee Factory, and it was our favorite little spot, up until one day Ms. Greene showed up looking all cute and what not. I wasn't a jealous person but I could tell when someone wanted what belonged to me. She went up to us and we all exchanged a few words but I couldn't help and notice when she said goodbye she was sure to rub his shoulder, not just any rub, she rubbed it like she was desperate, desperate to let him know how she really feels. In that moment I thought I could kill her, but I kept my cool and pretended like everything was okay. Johnny had to use the men's room, so I sat at the table and just was enjoying the view from the coffee house to the park next door. I turned my eye for a second and I notice Ms. Greene standing by the men's room and what do you know there he was my Johnny, and what seemed like a phone number exchange. I was shock, I wanted to go up to them both and sock them in the face, my body was hot and I know for a fact my blood was at a boiling temperature. He returns and pretends like nothing happened, like he didn't just give that whore his number. I was livid inside but I decided to pretend like I didn't know either. The next day at school I keep a close eye on them both, and how they are using their phone at corresponding times, smiling at each other, I knew she up to something I had to stop her. My first reaction was to tell somebody about the inappropriate relationship, and that better work. Sure enough the next day she isn't in class, I let out a sigh of relief. Comes in a substitute and let's us know our teacher is feeling a bit ill and will be out for a few days. I go on about my day and notice Johnny is still engaging in messages with this woman. He still had no clue I knew, how dumb can boys be, I mean really. I decided to take matters into my own hands, I loved this boy and no one was going to tear us apart we are meant to be forever. So, the day she returns to school I decided to follow her home after. I follow her just enough to see where she lives, what routes she takes, what kind of car she drives just the usual stuff you should know about a person. She was nice, I can admit that but she was posing as a threat to my relationship and we can not have that. I give them a few days, maybe she will realize what she is doing is wrong, and she will stop talking to my man. WRONG. Boy, I was so wrong. Although Johnny just turned 18, he is still a student. A student with a GIRLFRIEND. A week had gone by and they were both still clueless, so I followed her home. I waited outside for about 20 minutes before I decided to get off, and look around her house. I noticed right away each time she got home the bedroom light was always the first on one, so I waited for her to turn it off and go into a different room before sneaking around. I walk towards then window, and I am shook when I see my boyfriend laying there, on her bed butt naked. How did this happen? I think to myself. He must have came in through the back so no one would see him. That was my final straw, I could not believe I let it go this far, I knew then nothing could break them apart. I had to do something, and quick too. After sitting in my car all night until Johnny left, I decided to head in. I had a knife in one pocket, and a gun in the other. Just in case, It was my dad's gun but i'm sure he won't notice, I've had them in my car for about a week. I got off ran towards the bedroom window and peaked as much as I could. Obviously she was there in bed, naked, asleep. as if she had worked out, she did, just with the wrong partner. I slide open the window, knowing it won't make a sound as I have tested it before. I slowly climb in, and right as I am starring at her asleep, I load the gun and aim it straight at her head when the door swings open. It's Johnny. We stare at each other and I know he is in shock not one word has came out of his mouth, but he was definitely trying to say something his mouth was hanging to the floor. "DON'T MOVE!" I say as I stay aiming the gun at Johnny, and now have the knife aiming at Ms. G. "What are you doing ?!" "What you didn't think I would find out? Ya'll think ya'll are so slick?!" I was furious. I was sad, so many emotions were going through my head when I see Ms. G I reacted so fast. I couldn't believe it. I just shot my love, the love of my life there he was standing lifeless. I did that, look what you made me do I yell at his whore. This is your fault, all your fault! Tears were rolling down my face, and I could tell she was scared, she wanted me to put my weapons down, I just couldn't. "YOU TOOK ADVANTAGE OF MY BABY!" I express my feelings as I release another bullet.
By Maria D4 years ago in Fiction
Living With Anxiety
Everyone is starring at me, I just want to get out of here! Oh my gosh, I'm going to throw up. I feel nauseous, I feel like I look so stupid. I'm pretty sure those girls are laughing at me! I want to leave, can you hurry up and get whatever you need, I tell my very loving boyfriend. I hate coming to the stores, I hate going out in general. The cashier was nice, thank god. My heart was racing, and I kept thinking about every thing that could go wrong in this situation. Maybe I will say something I shouldn't, what if she is rude? What if they racially profile me? I'm honestly so nervous. I'm just trying to buy groceries and go straight home. I can't stop replaying that situation in my head, I could have said this instead, or that. She probably thought I was stupid.
By Maria D4 years ago in Humans
Clyde
No where to go. No where to run. I look at the sky and watch the clouds go by. If someone where to find me, I would have no where to hide. I don't feel safe. If the lady from the place told you otherwise, it was a lie. She makes me stay here, even when I yell and cry. The big bad man always hurts me, and tells me not to move or i'll die. My mouth is shut, and I don't even know why. I'm a good girl. I listen and I clean. I promise I won't be a problem, I won't even be seen! The days and night's started to go by, when one day I met a tree and named him Clyde. I know he isn't real, but when i'm sitting under his shade I feel my scars start to heal. I talk to him, and he talks back. He told me about his childhood, and how he became a tree. He used to be real, just like me. When a bad lady who looked like a witch cast a spell on him, and before he knew he started to feel buried in. Starting to grow out of the ground, poor Clyde, he couldn't even make a sound. Even if he tried, no one would hear. He cried for years, and years, until the day I came by. We found each other, and we both know why. As I got older I never forgot. I still come back and catch him up on a lot. He might not talk back anymore, but I hope he knows he'll always be my home. Forever and always Clyde, you where there when I thought I was alone.
By Maria D4 years ago in Poets

Maria D

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Happy Birthday Baby

Crystal Clear

Life to Reality

Who You Are

Love Yourself, Literally

The Desire of Fire

Love Is To Die For

Forgotten Sophie

Christmas Delight

Ms. Greene and My Johnny

Living With Anxiety

Clyde

Stories (52)