Jennie Fontaine
Stories (2)
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Sobriety.
So yesterday I hit 70 days sober. I am very proud and feel amazing. I feel great physically and mentally more each day I wake up. If you know you know. My anxiety and depression has eased and calmed down, somedays I feel "normal". I've struggled for years and with COVID this year my drinking became out of control. I'm not ashamed of it but not proud, and hopefully I'm able to help someone someday that has gone throught the same situation. It was to where I wouldn't even eat or drink water in the morning I would just start drinking. Some days more and heavier than others. I have gone through a crazy amount of life events in the past year which lead up to the drinking I'm talking about. Personal events that I'd rather not mention because it's too painful to remember them but I got through it.My last night of drinking though I fell on my face and fractured my nose, that was a scary wake up call. I'm still here, healthy and happy. I thank God, the universe and my willpower. I honestly don't know what would happen if I had continued and it's not something I would want to know either. My partner, family and friends have been supportive big time. I did lose a couple friends but clearly they were not friends but 'drinking buddies' and I'm totally fine with that. I don't need negative people in my life when I want nothing but positivity. The new path I'm on is super exciting and has so many new surprises and doors opening. Unexplainable feeling. It's almost as if I feel everything is perfect! I have everything I ever wanted in life and that's what's a bit scary because not many people can say that or will recieve that. I never want to be that person again now that I've escaped. I was such a sad, lost and angry person. I wanted to give up but I knew there was more to life. More happiness and freedom just waiting for me to find it. I had to be strong. I am strong. You really have to want it in order to succeed. I find for me anyway that's the only way it works. I love the fact that I inspire others, puts a smile on my face. I have people who inspire me, it's a great circle. Being sober is something I'll forever be proud of. Now I am able to focus on the good things, all the things that were there the whole time. Little things that I forgot I liked. Painting, puzzles, word searches, taking pictures, etc. Waking up knowing what I did last night is a plus too. Not hurting people with words, not hurting myself, or losing touch with family. I promise myself I will never let that happen. It's not always easy but I got this. And if this is something familiar to you then I'm cheering you on 100 percent. Don't let yourself fall.
By Jennie Fontaine5 years ago in Psyche
Entering my 30's.
On March 17, 2020 I turned 30 years old. I must say it was a strange way to enter my 30's as it was my very last day of work and very last time everything seemed normal as COVID-19 came around. As it was already around I guess this is when it starting to have a high number of cases and was worrisome. I tend to call it the month the world changed. I was so excited to enter a new decade of ages in my life. I'm lucky enough to mention I was able to enjoy my birthday but still seemed weird knowing it would be the last night everything was going to be open for awhile. With social distancing it starting to become lonely. At first it didn't seem as bad. But the more and more it became the normal situation to avoid being around people was tough to get use to. Wearing of the mask wasn't bad when it started out but now it's a must absoutely everywhere. It's now almost the end of November and nothing seems to have calmed down or chaged. Seems to be getting worse before it gets better I suppose. If this is the new normal then we have no choice but to get use to it. I'm sure in time it'll get better again but for now we just have to be safe and stay home. Don't be selfish, what if it was you with a weak immune system or a family member. I know some think it's all a hoax and that's fine. Everyone has their own point of view, their own mind, etc. It's not a time to worry about what people think right, just as long as you're following precautions. I pray the new year has better things to come. Stay positive everyone, we got this! A good outcome for myself with this year is I became sober, best decision I ever did. I found myself while I lost myself. In a way this year has showed me how much better life is. I appreciate family more, friends, health and freedom. Where would I be without any of that? The importance of the things that make you who you are is the key to being happy. My happiness was there all along but I needed to find it, and this is what opened my eyes. I broke free from the horrible dream I was living in. To think I was living that way thinking it was fun scares me. My life is so much better in just the 2 months of becoming sober. Was I really going to drink my 30's away? I basically wasted my 20's but you know what it is never too late to change. I have many things to look foward to in my life. The best is coming and I am so excited so live it up. Thankful. Thankful is the word I will use because it's what I feel. Thankful and blessed and I want everyone to be able to feel that. Everyone deserves that. So instead of trying to find anything negative I only want to see the positive. My 30's will and are going to be the best days of my life. Glad I took the right path for once. I am looking forward to sharing the best memories in the making with everyone.
By Jennie Fontaine5 years ago in Motivation
