Daniel Bradbury
Bio
Big fan of long walks in the woods, rye Manhattans, Spanish literature, jazz, and vinyl records.
Lover of all things creepy and crawly.
Stories (23)
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Welcome to MIM!
Congratulations on your acceptance to the Department of Memetic Infrastructural Management! We appreciate your commitment to safety and secrecy. Listed below are tips and guidelines to help you as you settle into your new role. MENS PURA, MUNDUS TUTUS.
By Daniel Bradbury2 days ago in Fiction
The Guitar
I decided to learn to play the guitar out of spite. My parents had bought one for me, years ago, but two separate instructors had been determined to use it as a means of teaching me to identify key signatures via Mary had a little lamb, London bridge is falling down, and various beige flavored compositions by other music tutors. I lost interest quickly. All of that changed on the night of my fifteenth birthday.
By Daniel Bradbury4 months ago in Beat
The Slasher Problem. Top Story - September 2025.
Imagine you're reading a story about someone who's trapped in a room with a hungry tiger. As a normal, comparatively weak human being they have no hope of besting the tiger in a fight. However, in the far corner of the room is a high-caliber hunting rifle: the perfect defense against a dangerous predator, if they could only get to it. Through trickery and careful maneuvering, the protagonist finally manages to secure the rifle. They turn it on the tiger, aim, fire, and the shot hits the animal directly between the eyes. The tiger immediately falls to the ground. It's a wound deadly enough to kill anything, after all.
By Daniel Bradbury4 months ago in Horror
Mr. Crowley
A good conman can fool an audience. A great conman can fool a nation. A master of the art can fool even himself. As he sat alone, staring into the fireplace embers at Netherwood boarding house, Edward Alexander Crowley was haunted by a disturbing thought. He no longer knew which category he belonged to.
By Daniel Bradbury7 months ago in History
Goose Games. Honorable Mention in Absurdist Awakening Challenge.
It had been a long week. A long week at the end of a long month. Eighty percent of Marc's paycheck had been dumped into bills, gas, and groceries. The boss was crawling up his ass over a shipment of lawn flamingos that hadn't arrived at its destination on time. (How urgent could lawn flamingos be? Apparently very.) The cherry on top of the shit sundae was that he had failed to compliment Zach's new haircut with the requisite enthusiasm the other day. A grave sin which he would not soon hear the end of. Marc checked his bank account. Two hundred bucks with four pending charges. By his calculations that gave him about sixty to screw around with. But what to do? Sixty was enough for a nice dinner and a couple of drinks, but he didn't really feel like trying to placate Zach with a date. Especially after he'd stirred up an attitude tsunami over something so stupid. You want a genuine compliment? Maybe don't pay three hundred bucks to shave a portrait of Mao Zedong smoking a blunt onto the side of your head. Sixty dollars could get him thoroughly wasted and purchase a burger, but Marc didn't like the sound of spending Saturday in recovery. What he was really craving was comfort. Nostalgia.
By Daniel Bradbury10 months ago in Humor
The Procedure
"The first time I heard about the procedure was in the summer of '46, and to be frank with you I didn't believe it. You hear things, collect anecdotes from posts or articles online but nothing ever seems to come of them, you know? Somebody's figured out how to turn dirt into gasoline, some schmuck achieves cold fusion in their garage, you think "wow!" and then you never hear anything about it again. This one was even less believable. We've been trying to answer that question ever since we figured out how to write shit down, probably before that too. Kings making deals with wizards, tech moguls subsisting off of rare fruit and injecting themselves with sheep plasma, every religion on earth all motivated by the promise of avoiding death and not one of them ever got it right. Can you really blame me for thinking it was nonsense?
By Daniel Bradbury10 months ago in Longevity
Howling. Top Story - January 2025.
"Oh my god, isn't she precious?" Jeannie cooed. Marcus had to admit she was right. The dog was awfully cute. She was tiny, couldn't have been more than a couple of months old. Dark brown fur and ears way too big for her body. There was a little sheet of laminated paper taped to the window with the pet store logo and some basic information, a kind of doggy dossier.
By Daniel Bradburyabout a year ago in Horror
I Love Resident Evil 4
I was a sheltered child. R-rated movies were placed under strict embargo in my parents' house. Comedy Central, South Park, and The Simpsons were all banned for being too crass. Power Rangers was determined to be too violent, and the stories were "too lowbrow". A litany of cartoons and anime were ousted by the censor's pen for crimes like women with low necklines or rude language: "stupid", "dumb", "dude", "freaking", "jerk", and the phrase "you go, girl" for some reason that still escapes me. Video games (rated E for everyone) were begrudgingly allowed to take up space in the entertainment center due to concerns that a child growing up completely removed from the influence of the outside world might have a hard time relating to other kids.
By Daniel Bradbury2 years ago in Gamers
