Brianna Lopez

I’m pregnant, mom

Growing up, there’s nothing a child wants to do more than to make their parents proud. Duh. At some point I thought it would be me to do so. I have 3 other siblings, my brother has the kindest soul serving for our country, my sister is a real estate beauty, and my little sister is the epitome of beauty and brains. Me? The hardest thing I had to do was crush my mother’s image of me. Of who she wanted me to be. I kept hidden for 4 months that I was pregnant, still in high school, at 18 years old, with no plans, no future. She cried to me about my options but I was already attached to my baby. In one of our biggest fights, I said everything and anything but I forgot to tell you one thing. When I found out I was going to be a mother, it took me back to the days where you gave up your food for me and my siblings. When you had to sleep on the floor so we can sleep on the mattress. Or when you made the extra effort to buy us something we wanted even though the price was a little on the higher end. Being a mother means to be selfless and yes I am scared. I’m scared I won’t be a mother like you, there’s no one in this world I want to be like more than you. I know the news was hard for you, it took you a while to come around. I’m glad that you did. I wanted your support more than anything in this world because I know you can make me feel okay. Like I’m a little baby again. As I get older, as YOU get older, all I want to do is make you happy, give you everything you deserve, and pay you back for being the best mother. Talking to you about my feelings hasn’t been the easiest after the news about the baby. I hope we can continue to grow our relationship, now that we will both be mothers.