Ariana GonBon
Bio
29yo bi Xicana. There's always more to write about, in more interesting ways than white men.
Instagram: @arte.con.ariana
For more stories unapproved by Vocal: colochosdeflores.wordpress.com
For entertaining tidbits: xismosaxit.com
Achievements (12)
Stories (125)
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Weighed Down
How do I even get out of here? There are no chains holding me down. The recesses so dark that they have their own kind of glow. But this is my nest and my cavern where not even bats will join me. They aren't blind you know, just really bad at sight. As am I, especially in foresight. I should have seen this coming, should have been able to track this decline.
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
Ghost Realms
I don’t listen to ghost stories. I believe in them too much. I think it’s better to leave them alone. I lived in a room where a girl died, no one remembers how, nor how true it is. I not-lit a bundle of rosemary in my smokeless room, telling her that I wouldn’t mess with her realm if she didn’t mess with mine. We all know I would have lost, but I thought I might as well respect her realm. She did end up respecting mine, although some things happened that she couldn’t help. See: the nights I woke “myself.”
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
Seven Weeks
I knew we would fall in love the moment I shook his hand. I convinced him to join me. He was reluctant. He went quiet during my spring break, my stomach shrinking away from the inevitable. He broke it off the day after I was sleeping in his shirt. I screamed and rocked and cried and he stared as this confirmed his feelings. I couldn't taste my Nana's cooking for a week, my tongue dying in solidarity with my gut. Once I was his age, I couldn't blame him, but I could still hate him for making home food bland.
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
Cleaning Day
It's just dishes. It's just floors. It's just dusting. It's just laundry. It's just vacuuming. It's just mopping. It's just switching laundry. It's just picking up. It's just cleaning the desk. It's just mail. It's just folding. It's just dishes. It's just wiping down the bathrooms. It's just cleaning tubs. It's just making knee pads from towels. It's just vinegar and short shoulders straining. It's just scrubbing toilets. It's just picking up. It's just sitting down. It's just watching shows you don't even like. It's just dishes, again. It's just Saturday. It's just your only day off. It's just work tomorrow.
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
Scabbing
I keep picking at our story, letting it scab over only to open it fresh again, thousands of blood cells coursing to the top for each moment together. Every time its scab over again, it's for a little longer, and a little more skin is formed, and the wound gets smaller. It’ll scar, new light brown pink cells showing off, proud to have beaten my impulses. I doubt you have a matching one. You started dating someone else before we stopped. You penciled me a letter so I could be as easily erased from your life. I’ll burn it someday.
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
Brazos De Mar Y Luna
I have come to love my room, where I am my own enemy and hero. My altar is in the corner, La Virgen (another Xicana), painted under Her aura, is there. All the different ways She can be portrayed look over me while I sleep, along with the letters from my grandparents, from a lost love, from current romance. She sees me fighting with myself to sleep.
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
I Chose Me
I chose me I chose me I chose me I CHOSE ME I CHOSE ME I CHOSE ME I CHOSE MY LIFE / I CHOSE MY LOVE / I CHOSE ME / I CHOSE ME / I CHOSE ME / I CHOSE MY BODY / I CHOSE MY JOY / I CHOSE ME / I CHOSE ME DESPERATELY / NO LONGER NEEDLESSLY LENDING MYSELF OUT / I CHOSE ME / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW I CHOSE MYSELF / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW IF THIS IS A MISTAKE / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW I CHOSE MYSELF / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW IF I AM HAPPY CHOOSING MYSELF / I WAS DESPERATE TO LOVE THEM / I AM DESPERATE TO LOVE MYSELF / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW I AM WORTH LOVING MYSELF / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW I AM MY OWN FRIEND / I AM DESPERATE TO BE MY OWN FRIEND / I AM DESPERATE FOR A SIMPLE ANSWER / I AM DESPERATE FOR THE SIMPLE ANSWER THAT I CHOSE MYSELF AND I CHOSE TO LOVE AND I CHOSE TO LEAVE AND I WILL ALWAYS LOVE THEM AND I CHOSE THE NEED TO LOVE ME / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW THAT I CHOSE ME / AND WHERE WILL CHOOSING ME LEAD BESIDES TEMPORARY MISERY AND MAYBE SOME REGRET / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW HOW MUCH REGRET I WILL HAVE / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW IF I WILL REGRET CHOOSING ME
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
I Am My Own
I am my own I am my own I am my own I AM MY OWN I AM MY OWN I AM MY OWN / I AM MY OWN LIFE / I AM MY OWN LOVE / I AM MY OWN / I AM MY OWN BODY / I AM MY OWN JOY / I AM MY OWN / DESPERATELY / NEEDLESSLY LENDING MYSELF OUT / I AM MY OWN / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW I AM MY OWN / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW IF THIS IS A MISTAKE / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW IF I CAN LEAVE / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW IF I CAN BE HAPPY / I AM DESPERATE TO LOVE THEM / I AM DESPERATE TO LOVE MYSELF / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW IF I AM WORTH LOVING MYSLF / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW THAT I AM MY OWN FRIEND / I AM DESPERATE TO BE MY OWN FRIEND / I AM DESPERATE FOR A SIMPLE ANSWER / I AM DESPERATE FOR THE SIMPLE ANSWER THAT I AM MY OWN AND MY OWN NEEDS TO LOVE AND MY OWN NEEDS TO LEAVE AND I WILL ALWAYS LOVE THEM AND I NEED TO LOVE ME / I AM MY OWN / I AM MY OWN / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW THAT I AM MY OWN / AND WHERE WILL BEING MY OWN LEAD BESIDES TEMPORARY MISERY AND MAYBE SOME REGRET / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW HOW MUCH REGRET I WILL HAVE / I AM DESPERATE TO KNOW IF I WILL REGRET BEING MY OWN
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
Allergies
I used to decorate my apartment with dahlias, chrysanthemums, daisies, carnations, roses, Queen Victorias, sunflowers, and lavender. He is allergic to flowers. He came into my life and he is not his allergies. He moved in with me, and he colored in the places that could not be filled by dying plants in old vases. He made me origami ones, let me paint the walls whatever crazy colors, and got me mugs with all different kinds on them.
By Ariana GonBon8 months ago in Poets
