Please Do Not Put an Advertisement in a Comment on Any of My Stories

I know I am not a very popular writer. Never have been, and likely never will be. Most of my stories get very few views. Out of those very few precious reads only on the rarest of occasions does someone take the time to post a comment. Because I get so few comments I take them very seriously and read and (try to) respond to each and every one. At the very least I like to say thank you to the person who wrote the comment. The fact that they took time out of their busy schedule to read something I wrote is cause for thanks enough, but adding a comment takes that to a whole other level of dedication. You don't comment on something unless it really strikes you in some way. Unless it has some sort of emotional or intellectual impact. For something you read to have an impact on that deep a level requires that you actually engage with the thing you are reading. You have to pay attention to it, and think about it, and that requires real dedication and commitment. I very much appreciate that and therefore believe it is appropriate and necessary to say thank you to readers for taking something I wrote and published so seriously. This applies even if the story itself is the opposite of serious, as are many of the things I write and publish.

Because I take reader comments so seriously I was more than a little annoyed recently when a "reader" left a comment on a story I wrote which was nothing more than an advertisement for some vaguely topic related publication. It was obvious from the comment that this "reader" had not actually read my story at all. They had seen the title of the story, noted that it aligned with their publications area of focus, and then proceeded to shit out an advertisement for said publication in the comments. Helpfully to no one the com-ad (new word alert) provided a link to to their publication, but provided zero commentary on my story, nor did it provide anything else of interest or value to the greater universe as a whole. Look, I have no problem with people linking their shit in comments to my stories. In fact, I encourage and support it. Just because it is a complete waste of your time to link your stories in comments to my stories from a readership perspective, does not mean it is a waste of time from a greater good of the whole perspective. Unlike the com-ad which is a complete waste of time and space from every perspective available for perspecting (new word alert 2).

With all of that said, let me say this one more time so I can be crystal clear. Please, do not put fucking advertisements in the comments to my stories. If you do I can guarantee you of one thing. I will mercilessly mock the shit out of you until you start to cry and have to go call your mom to tell her how some mean bad internet guy made fun of you online so much that it made you cry and wet yourself. Do not fucking do it. Please. For the love of God. And, finally, fuckin-A Vocal can you please end this stupid fucking six hundred word count minimum bullshit already. It is really pissing me the fuck off right now. This story is done. It is over. And yet here we go again with me having to go on and on in some bullshit fashion about some bullshit for no good fucking reason. It fucking sucks. End it already. Damn.