I See You, Grief

Grief and I go way back. I can feel grief's presence, but it's not always right beside me. Sometimes it's just a in the background, barely noticeable. Other times, it's suddenly at my doorstep, catching me off guard. When it does get close, that hollow feeling in my chest returns, and the familiar weight settles on my shoulders.

I figured out a while back that trying to fight it is useless. It's like trying to hold back the tide - you'll just get swept away. And running from it? Forget it. Grief's got a way of finding you, no matter where you hide.

I sit with it, bringing compassion and understanding, gently holding it with dignity. I approach it with curiosity, like I'm trying to understand a language I never wanted to learn. And I remind myself that this feeling, no matter how deep, won't take me under.

There are months that grief doesn't tap on my shoulder. But I've learned that grief isn't trying to erase my happiness or weigh me down constantly. Grief may resurface unexpectedly, but it doesn't have to overshadow everything else. I can feel joy, even with grief as my companion. It's not about getting comfortable or uncomfortable - it's about understanding that both grief and happiness can coexist in my life.

I know its visit will be brief, and surprisingly, a sense of love often accompanies it. There's even a glimmer of hope in these moments. Grief isn't here to erase my happiness or cast a permanent shadow. I've learned that I can laugh and cry in the same breath. I can miss someone terribly and still enjoy a beautiful sunset. Life's not simple anymore, but maybe it's richer. Grief, love, hope - they're all jumbled up together in this crazy journey called life.

If you're dealing with this too, know that you're not alone in this journey. We're all trying to figure it out, one day at a time. Some days are tougher than others, but each day is a new chance to practice being compassionate with ourselves, grief and all.

I'm Victoria, co-founder of the Healing Arts Center in Virginia Beach. My personal experiences have shaped my approach to healing and self-discovery. Through a combination of mindfulness techniques, somatic practices, Reiki, hypnotherapy, and breathwork, I guide others in their own journeys of self-compassion and growth.