Commertisements

If you are a shitty writer like myself, and if you are regularly publishing here, you probably are. It is also highly like then, that, like myself, you have a fragile ego, which constantly needs reassurance in the form of positive comments on your works in order to prevent you from sinking into the deepest and darkest of depressions. Further, you no doubt tend to respond to comments which stroke said ego preferentially to those which do whatever the opposite of stroking is, or have little effect on it. If you are at all like me in other ways, almost certainly you are not, however, it still may be true that you make an effort to respond to every comment anyone posts on something you publish. You do this because you are genuinely thankful that someone, anyone, would take time out of their busy schedule to not only read something you published online, but also then to comment on it. Reading something takes very little effort or commitment, but reading something and thinking about it enough, or for it to have enough of an impact on you, that it inspires you to actually say something about it, for good or ill, is pretty darn amazing in my book. Of course my book is about as popular as the rest of my writings, and no doubt just as full of run on sentences and unusual or ungrammatical constructs plus loads of made up words like ungrammatical, so what the fuck do I know. Obviously not very much, however one thing I do know is that fucking with the sanctity of the comments section on my writings really pisses me off. And using them as a place to insert your shitty advertisements for whatever stupid shit pisses me off even more. Using my own fragile ego against me really seriously pisses me off. So, what am I going to do about it you may be asking yourself if you have not long ago clicked away to watch a cat video on You Tube or anything else more interesting then this. This is what I am going to do about it. Bitch and moan about it like a big fucking crybaby. That is my preferred method of dealing with most things that piss me off, and many things do. Much to my wife's unending dismay. I guess ultimately my message is please stop wasting my time with this shit in my comments. And, what do you think of the new word I invented? Pretty cool right? A little on the nose but whatever it gets the job done. One of these days I am going to compile all the words I have invented over the years and publish them. I shall call it a dictionary. Dan's dictionary. Wow. I am sure it will be at least as popular as all my other written works. Amazing when you think about it. Don't think about it. I try not to. It is very depressing.

It is also depressing that I need to continue writing words down in order to meet the arbitrary 600 word count minimum needed to publish this in the Vocal writing community where I think it would fit best. I am actually not sure if that is true any longer or ever was, but I am way too lazy to take the time to find out so it is just easier, and more fun, to sit here and shit out a bunch of stupid nonsense until I hit 600. At which point the magic happens and all of a sudden a bunch of dumb words strung together for no reason become an actual story worthy of being published and read by at least one or two actual humans, and at least a few bots that will scan it for offensive content. Yeah, I did it! I am so proud of myself and you, the reader, for having made it this far. Congratulate yourself with a well deserved pat on the back or whatever thing you like to do when you want to congratulate yourself for something. Most probably a self pat on the back is not it. I don't judge, do whatever you want. Seriously go do it, now. Unless it is to write a commertisement. Or to program a bot to do so. Do not do that. Ever. Please.