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Help Is Not a Right! Here’s Why the World Doesn’t Care About Your Problems

The Brutal Truth About Why People Help or Ignore You

By Nova Aji NugrohoPublished 11 months ago 3 min read
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In this harsh world, help is not given freely. People judge whether you are worth helping or just a burden. Personal relationships play a major role in this decision, and psychological and emotional factors determine everything.

1. The Reciprocity Principle: What Do They Gain from Helping You?

No one likes being used. If someone believes helping you will benefit them in the future, they will do it. If not, don’t expect them to care. One-sided relationships, where you only take without giving, will eventually push people away.

2. Emotional Closeness: How Important Are You to Them?

If you are not an essential part of someone’s life, they won’t bother helping you. People only care about those with whom they share a deep emotional connection. If you’re just an acquaintance or someone who only appears when in need, don’t be surprised if they ignore you.

3. Are You Worth Helping?

Humans always judge. If they see that your struggles result from your own foolishness, they will walk away. But if they believe you are a victim of uncontrollable circumstances, they are more likely to step in. Lost your job due to layoffs? They might sympathize. Lost your job because of laziness? That’s your problem.

4. The Emotional State of the Helper: They Have Their Own Problems Too

Don’t expect people to always care. If they are overwhelmed with their own struggles, stress, or exhaustion, your problems are not their priority. Only mentally stable individuals have the energy to help. If they don’t, you are simply not their concern.

5. Fear of Being Used: No One Wants to Be Exploited

People learn from experience. If they’ve helped someone before and felt betrayed or exploited, they will be more selective in the future. If you only show up when you need something and disappear afterward, they will recognize the pattern and stop caring.

6. Culture and Environment: Do You Live in a Society That Cares?

Some cultures encourage helping others, while others are more individualistic. If you live in a place where everyone only looks out for themselves, then you are on your own. No one will care if you struggle. You must build strong relationships to ensure there’s someone willing to help you.

7. Balance in Relationships: Are You Always Taking or Also Giving?

In friendships or romantic relationships, help only flows when there is balance. If you only know how to ask but never give, people will start to pull away. Healthy relationships are about mutual support. If one side always gives while the other just takes, eventually, they will stop.

8. Trust: Once You Betray It, Don’t Expect Help Again

Trust is expensive. If you have ever used or betrayed someone, they won’t forget. Someone who has been disappointed once won’t be foolish enough to fall into the same trap again. If you have a reputation for lying or manipulating, forget about being helped.

9. Social Influence: If Others Aren’t Helping You, They Won’t Either

Humans are social creatures. If people around you don’t help you, others will follow their lead. No one wants to be the only one who cares about someone that everyone else ignores. On the other hand, if your environment shows concern, others may feel compelled to join in.

10. Personal Motivation: Some People Only Help to Feel Good

Some people don’t help because they truly care but because it makes them feel better about themselves. But if they don’t see emotional benefits from helping you—such as feeling appreciated—they will stop caring.

Conclusion: If You Bring No Value, Don’t Expect Help

In this ruthless world, help doesn’t come free. People assess who deserves their help and who doesn’t. If you don’t build strong relationships, prove your worth, or contribute anything in return, don’t be surprised when people walk away.

If you want to receive help in personal relationships, make sure you also give, be someone trustworthy, and build deep emotional bonds. Because, in the end, no one wants to help someone who only knows how to take without ever giving back.

relationships

About the Creator

Nova Aji Nugroho

"Tired of shallow takes? Same. I write with wit, bite, and just enough heart to confuse people. It’s not about being right it’s about being real. If that’s your vibe, welcome to the club."

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