Don't Insult Women's Day By Treating It Like A Valentine's Day

It was a Sunday, and I needed to catch up on some much-needed sleep. I didn’t want to spend time cooking, so I picked up my phone to order some food.

Before I could even open the food delivery app, the notification bar on my phone was exploding with offers.

Buy a dozen cupcakes for your female colleagues or order a box of chocolates for your girlfriend or daughter, reserve a dinner table for your partner or send a meaningful gift to your mom. It was the weekend before International Women’s Day, and these guys wanted us to make our ladies feel special.

Yes, 8th March, Monday is International Women’s Day, but do women really want chocolates and gifts? I am not against celebrating days, but celebrating without understanding the true meaning of the occasion is also a crime, isn’t it?

Why International Women’s Day?

To understand the meaning behind this day, we need to go back in history. It began as a labor movement when 15000 women marched through the city of New York in 1908 demanding better pay, shorter working hours, and the right to vote.

In America, the socialist party declared the first National Women’s Day in 1909. In 1910, the idea of an International Women’s Day was tabled during a conference in Copenhagen. In 1911, four countries celebrated women’s day — Austria, Denmark, Germany, and Switzerland. Women in Russia called for a strike in 1917 demanding bread and peace.

It was on 23rd February in the Julian calendar, 8th March in the Gregorian calendar that the United Nations officially recognized Women’s Day in 1977. They wanted the day to create awareness about women’s issues and talk about challenges faced by them.

Do you understand my frustration behind these celebrations!

Do women today really enjoy equal rights?

It’s 2021, women are still fighting for their most basic and the most primitive of rights. They are still battling the Victorian era mentality, and I do not see why we should raise a toast tomorrow for celebrating women’s day.

Even today, women do not even have basic sexual and reproductive rights in some African countries. Women are still fighting for their right to own choice.

Ninety million women of reproductive age live in countries that prohibit abortion.

Which means a woman is not allowed to make decisions about her own body. She is denied access to health care and contraception. Motherhood is forced on her, and the worst part; there are no exceptions made even in cases of rape or danger to health. These things happen even in developed countries like Malta and San Marino.

According to the Centre for Reproductive Rights, 41% of women live in countries with restrictive abortion laws. Abortion is a human right, and a woman should have the right to decide — whether she wants to have children, when she wants it, with whom, and how many.

Why do countries think that they get to have a say in a lady’s personal life?

The World Health Organization says that 23000 women die every year because of unsafe abortions. Therefore, if you’re looking to help women on women’s day; campaign against restrictive laws, speak up for women’s rights and support a woman’s right to freedom of movement. By the way, most animals have it more than women.

A women’s right to live on her own terms

This is another battle women are fighting across the globe. In Iran, a woman needs to ask for her husband’s permission to travel abroad. In Saudi Arabia, a woman needs a husband’s permission to leave prison if she is detained. In Nigeria, men are legally allowed to beat their wives; the law says, “nothing is an offense if done by a husband for the purpose of correcting his wife’s mistake.”

In El Salvador, a woman can be put in jail if she suffers a miscarriage. 39 countries have laws preventing a woman from inheriting the same proportion of assets as men. In Syria and Egypt, the penal codes allow a milder punishment for honor killings.

So what exactly are we celebrating?

Many women across the world are murdered or forced to take their own lives. I have a few articles which went viral in the past 30 days. Please have a look at them.

1) In Argentina, 18-year-old Ursula Bahillo was brutally killed by her ex-boyfriend. She was stabbed 30 times.

2) In India, 23-year-old Ayesha Banu committed suicide by jumping into a river. She had a dowry harassment case against her husband and his family.

3) In Israel, 35-year-old Diana Raz was shot dead by her police officer husband in front of their four kids in a fit of rage.

4) In Canada, 69-year-old Kathleen Hatcher was murdered by her own son.

What I mentioned above are a few viral stories. There are hundreds like these every day. Violence against women is real.

According to a UN 2017 survey, six women are killed every hour by men around the world. 137 women are killed every single day by their partners or a family member. Femicide has worsened during the pandemic.

According to the World Economic Forum’s Gender Gap report 2020, 45% of women in North Africa and West Asia are victims of physical or sexual abuse. South Asia’s situation is nothing better; 38% of women here suffer physical or sexual violence, North America-32%, Sub-Saharan Africa- 31%, Latin America and the Caribbean- 27%, and Western Europe its 22%.

So if you’re looking to champion women’s rights on 8th March, dump the flowers instead, call out those who think it’s normal to abuse women, call out the families who attack women, encourage women to speak up for themselves.

Most women choose not to because they do not have an option or any support.

Fight for their education and independence

When a girl is born in my country India, parents prefer saving for her marriage. Why invest in the girl’s education? While this is changing over the period of time, but still exists in a lot of orthodox families.

This not only for India. We have equal partners across the globe. According to Unicef, only 66% of countries have gender parity in primary education. In upper secondary education, the numbers drop to 25%.

While some refuse to send girls to school, there are others who attack girls for going to school.

On 9th October 2012, Malala Yousafzai was shot by the Taliban. She was only fifteen years old. Her only fault was that she was a too outspoken girl for Pakistan’s Swat valley.

In Afghanistan, more than 210 girl schools were closed down in 2016. In Mali, girls have been sexually abused for failing to follow the dress codes mandated by armed groups. In Somalia, girls were kidnapped from their schools and hostels to become wives of Al- Shabaab fighters.

According to UNESCO, at least 132 million girls are out of school. They’re being denied a future, financial independence, and the very basic right to education.

On this women’s day, support girls win the war waged against their education.

Women and politics

When women in America were given the right to vote in 1922, one woman celebrating the constitutional amendment had said, “we cannot change the psychology of the world in a day, but that change will be profound and lasting.”

One hundred years have passed on paper. Every woman today has voting rights, but does she have a voice? Let me quote a few real-world examples and statistics.

Kuwait’s parliamentary committee for women has all male members. Council for Foreign Relations states that “it could take eighteen years for Pakistan’s to close its gender voting gap.” In Afghanistan, many women do not vote because of the mandatory photo screening at polling stations.

Women get paid 77% of what men get for the same work; this is according to Amnesty International.

The United Nations Women’s organization observed that women do not hold enough positions of power. Only 25% of parliamentarians today are women the world over. There are only 21 women Heads of State or Heads of government. Only fourteen countries have 50% or more women in cabinet. The funny part — The UN Women’s organization has its website name as “unwomen.org”. The UN itself has never had a woman Secretary-General. The position has changed nine times, but all have been men.

This is not about competence or tokenism; there are enough and more competent women leaders; this is about equal opportunity.

Where is equality this women’s day?

How will we have women-centric policies if women do not have a say in politics? How will the world achieve gender equality? We have what is called the right to equality only on paper.

Surprisingly, there is already a UN convention that adapted a paper in 1979 on the elimination of all forms of discrimination against women. But in reality, women are discriminated against both at home and at work.

While only six countries give men and women equal legal rights, thirty-six countries have made marital rape legal, including my own country — India.

Please understand, women do not want flowers; for them, their basic human rights are more important.

As the saying goes, “it’s time for a change, some meaningful change.”

So vow this International Women’s day that instead of a fancy candlelight dinner or a box of chocolates, instead; start a movement to provide equal rights and respect to the women of this world.

I wish you all a Happy International Women’s Day!!