What Went Wrong: You Reap What You Sow

Karma's a bitch, Dallas. Not as big of a bitch as your coach, though.

The Dallas Stars' 2025 playoff run saw the referees do everything possible to make sure they got far. In Round 1, they handed out power plays to Dallas in the same fashion that Oprah was handing out cars, falling for every dive and acting job the stars committed, while actual penalties against Dallas went ignored. Round 2 was more of the same, though it also helped Dallas that Connor Hellebuyck was in Jekyll and Hyde mode in that six-game series.

The Western Conference Final saw me do the impossible: they made me feel sorry for the Oilers. The Oilers! A team known for being power play merchants actually gained my sympathy, because not only was Dallas getting away with shit, but actual calls against them drew the usual ire from Dallas' cueball coach. Even so, despite the big deal they made during the season, and the refs helping them advance so they could get two of their best players back, what did it get them? Another third round loss. One less game than last year, and it was the Oilers... AGAIN.

Time to get the shovel, because it's buryin' time!

Jason Robertson

Here's the thing: I actually like Jason Robertson. He's a huge part of representation in this great sport. However, the refs did their best to make sure that Dallas would actually get the chance to have Robertson back in this run. Robertson was supposed to be out for all of Round 1. If that series was officiated right down the middle, we wouldn't see Robertson until October. So what did ol' Robo contribute in this run? 11 games, six points. Granted four of those points went in the net (including two in Game Five), but still. This is what the refs worked for: so Robertson could return and underperform.

Mason Marchment

Mason Marchment. I despise this fuckface. The NHL equivalent of Draymond Green. Dirty as hell, dives, and bitches to referees when he doesn't get his way. In one game, he actually intentionally hit one of the refs with his stick. He received no penalty! Refs were making it painfully obvious that they were in Dallas' pocket. I've seen Nathan MacKinnon get unsportsmanlike conduct penalties just for looking at refs the wrong way, yet Marchment intentionally strikes a ref and they swallow their whistles. OMG...

Mikko Rantanen

Ah, Moose. Mikko Rantanen started out very slow, but when he was needed, the points came in bunches--especially the goals. Hat tricks in back-to-back games. Yikes. In Game Three against the Jets: goal and two helpers. After that, well, that's another story. In what would be the final eight games of his wild season, Rantanen couldn't find the net. And in that instant, Avs fans went from being all over the place in frustration and regret during Moose's tear, to saying, "See? This is exactly what we've dealt with." That is true, BTW. There have been moments when we had Moose where I've begged for a goal from him due to his dry spells. Even so, Rantanen finished with 22 points (9G/13A), leading the team during this run, but he was supposed to be the magic piece that would lead to Cup #2 for Dallas.

Jake Oettinger

Literally the only one on this team I actually feel for is Jake Oettinger, and it's not the first time. I remember his 64-save performance three years ago in Game Seven, which his teammates lost because they couldn't piece two shots together. Game Six of this series against Edmonton saw Otter give up two goals in as many shots. Apparently, that was enough for Otter to be pulled--just over seven minutes into the game. That's quite odd. I've seen goalies do worse and stay in longer. What happened next? A minute later, it's 3-0 Oilers. Seriously, Oettinger can't be happy with this. In a game Dallas needed to win, the team's star goalie gets pulled after a brief hiccup.

Which brings me to the main catalyst of this whole thing:

Peter DeBoer

I absolutely, positively despise this guy. In 2021, back when he was coaching the Vegas Golden Knights, Peter DeBoer had the nerve to bitch and moan about a correct slashing call against Vegas in Game Two against the Avs. The call was made in OT, and we won in OT. Ironically, the goal scorer: Mikko Rantanen. I still, to this day, say that DeBoer basically intimidated the refs into never calling anything against Vegas, and here it is, four years later, and he's still doing it. This egghead bitches about the refs when they're actually being fair, and his intimidation leads to refs kissing a ring that DeBoer will never win. Zebras back down, and they fall for every dive.

And let me make one thing clear: the "egghead" comment is ironic. DeBoer thinks he knows everything. The only thing that idiot has going for him is buying off the refs against my Avs. That's literally it. It takes a special type of stupid to pull your top goalie in an elimination game after a few hiccups. Even worse, DeBoer doubled down on the decision and threw Otter under the bus, saying, "Well, Oettinger's lost six of his last seven to Edmonton." And that's Otter's fault?! Seriously?!

Peter DeBoer: the NHL equivalent of Brandon Staley. Thinks he knows everything, actually knows nothing, and has the nerve to wonder why he hasn't won. Your pink slip is waiting, Pete.

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The acquisition of Rantanen made this year Dallas' best chance to win, yet here they are again, eliminated in the Final Four for the third straight season. The window has to be closed after this, and if it's not, it's almost there. Four times in this decade, the Stars were one of the final four teams remaining, and they've only reached the Final once. I was wrong all this time. I said that the Stars had avoided the typical Dallas team trait of getting in their own way. Nope. I think they're even worse than the Cowboys when it comes to self-sabotage, and this year definitely proves it. That 1999 Cup is going to be quite lonely for a lot of years.