Divisional Playoff Recap: Josh Allen is a Choke Artist, Stop Pretending He's Not

As long as I can remember, I've always really loved the Divisional Playoff. The Divisional Playoff was originally the opening round of the merged NFL's playoffs, officially born in the same year that the merger happened: 1970. Since 1978, the Divisional Playoff has been the second round, and it's the round where the teams on bye are introduced. In addition, the Divisional Playoff serves as the final week to feature Saturday games, and also kicks off the "set bracket" portion of the playoffs.

Eight teams remained entering this weekend, with the winners playing for their respective conferences, while the defeated teams would get picks 25-28 in the draft. So let's look at the results:

Bills @ Broncos

No. Just... no. There are no excuses. Not this time. There shouldn't have been excuses during each of the previous two failures, but there are definitely none this time. This was supposed to be Josh Allen's easiest chance, remember? No Mahomes. No Lamar. No Burrow. This was Josh's conference to lose, and he did lose it--all on his own. Lost two fumbles, and threw an interception, but thanks to the All-Pros who delusional crybabies claim are nonexistent, they made it to OT. Speaking of bullshit excuses, remember four years ago when Bills fans said, "If Josh Allen had the ball in OT, they'd win"? Well, the league decided to move the goalposts and change the OT rules, so Josh Allen would get the ball, even with Denver winning the toss. Even better, Josh got the ball after Denver went three-and-out, so all he had to do was get to field goal range.

Guess what? Another interception.

Broncos got to FG range, made the kick, got the win. 33-30 was the final score in Denver's favor. Four turnovers for Josh Allen; two lost fumbles, and two interceptions, including one in OT. Lamar Jackson has been skewered for much less than that. Josh Allen choked this away on his own. Seriously, anyone who is still making excuses for Josh Allen even after this is both delusional and racist, because again, the same people moving the goalposts every time Josh blows it, are the same ones who hurl the phrase, "Playoff Lamar," for way less. The Josh Allen apologists just hate Lamar because he's Black. Plain and simple.

49ers @ Seahawks

This was over just 13 seconds into the game. The game started with Rashid Shaheed returning the opening kickoff 95 yards for a touchdown, and honestly, it was all they needed. The rest of the game was followed by the Seahawks tearing it up, including Kenneth Walker III scoring three times. A 41-6 victory for the Seahawks, with Sam Darnold being the equivalent of "Luigi wins by doing nothing." For the Niners, the dream of playing the Super Bowl in their home stadium is over, which is what happens when you don't have a QB.

Texans @ Patriots

Cold weather was the theme for Sunday's action, beginning with the New England Patriots hosting the Houston Texans. The weather wasn't the only thing that was cold. CJ Stroud's penchant for turnovers continued in this outing, and unlike Wild Card Weekend, the Texans defense could not bail him out. Granted they did take the ball from Drake Maye twice, but they just couldn't do a thing. The Patriots were too much, and CJ threw four interceptions in the first half.

Patriots won it, 28-16, and for Houston, the drought continues. The Texans remain the only team to have never reached the Conference Championship, and there are major questions surrounding CJ Stroud. The magic he had in 2023 is pretty much gone now. As for the Patriots, they are playing for the conference for the first time since 2018, and they'll be facing a Broncos team with their top quarterback out for the year. Yikes!

Rams @ Bears

Divisional Playoff Weekend ended in an even colder climate: Chicago. The Bears played host to the Los Angeles Rams during a weekend that saw the home teams win the previous three games. The Rams made things challenging for the Bears, as they intercepted Caleb Williams twice, but it was still close. Down seven, the Bears were in close goal to go range late, but they went four and out thanks to the stupidity Ben Johnson. Despite this, the Rams ended up punting, giving Chicago another chance. It looked like it was over, until Caleb did that thing again. 4th down and 5 on LA's 14. Caleb was pressed and running backwards. 26 yards backwards! Despite this, Caleb launched a bomb to a wide open Cole Kmet! Good grief!

Overtime in this one, Rams had the ball and they go three and out. Bears have the ball next, with OT now in sudden death mode. Their drive ends with Caleb's third interception, and that gives the Rams a chance to win it with any score. They get to field goal range and Harrison Mevis nails it! 20-17 is the final score in the Rams' favor, and the Bears became the lone home team to lose this weekend. Remember the motto, kids: the Bears still (and always will) suck.

And then there were four. The Final Four. The Conference Championships are all set! In the American Football Conference, it's the Denver Broncos hosting the New England Patriots on CBS. In the National Football Conference, it's the Seattle Seahawks hosting the Los Angeles Rams on Fox. That has to be hell for Niners fans. One of their division rivals will be playing in the Niners' place on February 8. Both games will take place on Sunday, January 25, and will be the last games for both CBS and Fox, as NBC will air Super Bowl LX.

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