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The Money Rule My Immigrant Parents Taught Me That Changed Everything

How a Single Principle Shaped My Financial Journey and Mindset

By Mutonga KamauPublished 9 months ago 5 min read

The Money Rule My Immigrant Parents Taught Me That Changed Everything

How a Single Principle Shaped My Financial Journey and Mindset

Growing up in a household led by immigrant parents, money wasn’t just a resource, it was a lifeline. Every coin had a purpose, every pound was accounted for, and every financial decision carried the weight of hopes, sacrifices, and the dream of a better life. While friends at school spoke casually about shopping trips and holidays, our family dinners often centred around budgeting, priorities, and contingency plans.

My parents didn’t speak the financial jargon you might hear in a seminar or read in a personal finance book. They didn’t hold degrees in economics or access to wealth-building courses. Yet they handed me a financial rule that has proven to be more impactful than any formal lesson:

**"Spend less than you earn, and always save something first."

**

This rule, simple yet profound, became the cornerstone of my financial philosophy. And it transformed everything.

A Foundation Built on Frugality

When my parents arrived in the UK, they brought with them nothing but a few suitcases and the weight of responsibility. They took jobs far below their qualifications and worked tirelessly to provide stability. Luxury was not a concept in our household, security was.

I remember my mother washing and reusing freezer bags, and my father cycling to work even in the dead of winter. To an outsider, these may have seemed like extremes. But to them, these were choices made from a place of empowerment. Every pound saved had a purpose: a utility bill, a school fee, a little fund for when times get rough.

There were no designer clothes, no flashy electronics, and no eating out for convenience. But there was warmth, there was consistency, and there was a future being built quietly, one frugal choice at a time.

Learning Delayed Gratification

As a child, I often felt frustrated. I wanted the same toys my classmates had. I wanted the family holidays I heard others talk about. But each time I expressed these wishes, my parents never shamed me. Instead, they gently explained our priorities. "We’re saving for something more important," they’d say.

This constant reinforcement helped me develop the concept of delayed gratification. Rather than feeling deprived, I slowly began to appreciate the value of planning. My first big lesson came when I was fourteen. I wanted a second-hand laptop to help with schoolwork. My parents agreed but insisted I save half the cost. It took me a year of small chores, birthday money, and saying no to temptations.

When I finally made that purchase, it wasn’t just a laptop. It was a tangible reward for patience, consistency, and goal-setting. That feeling of earned accomplishment stayed with me far longer than the machine itself.

The Rule in Action: "Spend Less Than You Earn"

This part of the rule sounds obvious, perhaps too simple to be profound. Yet, in a world driven by credit, lifestyle inflation, and impulsive spending, it is often overlooked.

When I got my first job, the temptation to spend freely was real. Suddenly, I had access to things I once only dreamed of. But my parents' rule echoed in my mind. I decided early on to live beneath my means. I chose a modest flat, skipped the latest gadgets, and cooked at home more often than not.

I wasn’t aiming for minimalist perfection. I simply made conscious decisions to prioritise long-term peace of mind over momentary pleasures. As a result, I built an emergency fund, paid off my student loans faster than expected, and eventually started investing.

"Save Something First", The Power of Paying Yourself First

Saving was never treated as what’s "left over" after spending. It was treated as a non-negotiable. As soon as income came in, a percentage went into savings, no exceptions.

This act, though sometimes challenging, became a ritual of self-respect. It was a commitment to my future self. I started with small amounts, £50 a month. Over time, that amount grew, and so did my confidence in managing money.

Saving first meant that I always had a cushion. It meant I could afford to take risks like switching jobs or pursuing additional training. It meant I could help my parents when they needed it. Most importantly, it meant I slept better at night.

Emotional Security Through Financial Boundaries

What my parents really gave me was not just a rule but a foundation for emotional security. Money wasn’t a source of chaos or fear in our home. It was a tool; one we learned to respect, manage, and use wisely.

Of course, there were tough times. There were medical emergencies, job layoffs, and unexpected expenses. But because of that foundational rule, we were never in freefall. There was always a plan, always a safety net, always a way forward.

This emotional steadiness carried into my adult life. I don’t panic when unexpected expenses arise. I don’t compare my life to others based on material things. I feel in control, and that is more valuable than anything money can buy.

Passing the Rule Forward

Now that I have children of my own, I see the beauty and depth of what my parents taught me. I’ve started talking to them about money early, not in fear, but in empowerment. We discuss needs versus wants, the joy of saving, and the freedom of choices that come from discipline.

I don’t expect them to follow the same exact path, but I hope they carry forward the spirit of the rule. I hope they understand that money doesn’t define them but how they manage it can shape their lives.

Conclusion: A Legacy of Wisdom

"Spend less than you earn, and always save something first."

This rule, passed down quietly over dinner tables and daily choices, has changed the course of my life. It has given me stability, resilience, and a deep respect for what money can do when handled with care.

In a world filled with complex financial advice, my parents’ simple rule remains the most powerful tool in my arsenal. It taught me not just how to manage money, but how to live with intention, humility, and hope.

Their story, and now mine, is proof that profound financial wisdom doesn’t come from wealth, it comes from values.

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About the Creator

Mutonga Kamau

Mutonga Kamau, founder of Mutonga Kamau & Associates, writes on relationships, sports, health, and society. Passionate about insights and engagement, he blends expertise with thoughtful storytelling to inspire meaningful conversations.

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